


Fatal Burn

by ruskarmelita



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Star Wars Setting, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Amputee Darth Vader, Anakin Skywalker Has Issues, Anakin Skywalker Needs a Hug, Car Accidents, Caretaking, Character Death, Cultural Differences, Dark, Dark Anakin Skywalker, Darth Vader Needs a Hug, Developing Relationship, Dimension Travel, Doctor/Patient, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Roller Coaster, F/M, Flashbacks, Force Choking (Star Wars), Force Visions, Forgiveness, Gentleness, Healing, Heavy Angst, Hospitalization, Hurt, Hurt Anakin Skywalker, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, Intimacy, Lack of Communication, Medical Inaccuracies, Medical Procedures, Mentioned Padmé Amidala, Midi-chlorians (Star Wars), Mild Blood, Mild Language, Misunderstandings, Mystery, Near Death, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Original Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Female Character, Pain, Physical Disability, Post-Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith, Quote: The Force works in mysterious ways, Reader-Insert, Sad, Sad Darth Vader, Self-Acceptance, Self-Harm, Self-Reflection, Slow Burn, Some Humor, Suffering, Suited Darth Vader, Surprises, Suspense, Telekinesis, Telepathy, Terminal Illnesses, That's Not How The Force Works, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, Tragic Romance, Uncertain Fate, Universe Alteration, Weird Plot Shit, What Have I Done, What-If
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:48:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 38
Words: 78,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25417192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruskarmelita/pseuds/ruskarmelita
Summary: An unidentified man was brought to the hospital you were interning to be a doctor. His case - the worst the hospital had ever seen. Found after the car crash, still strapped to the driver's seat, burned to the crisp until his features were no longer recognizable, his limbs severed, he was placed in the ICU care, strapped to the machines that took over his normal body functions. How he managed to stay alive was a mystery to all, yet everyone believed the man would die within the next 24 hours.Today was the day you'd be given your own patient under your care in your last year of an internship. Yet something drew you to the case presented to you of the burned man, his features oddly familiar to you, whatever you could recognize of his mangled flesh on his face. You believed the man would survive, and you wantedhimto be your patient. Where would this path take you? And who was this man?
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker/Reader, Darth Vader/Reader
Comments: 574
Kudos: 461





	1. Internship.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so very sorry. I don't know what prompted me to start another story on top of the one I'm currently writing, but this idea had been bugging me for the past few years and I've finally decided to write it down. I am by no means knowledgeable in any medical procedures or hospital equipment (even though I'm a dental hygienist so I guess that makes me sort of a health professional right?) so forgive me if I mess up some terminology or procedure, although I'll be heavily relying on google for help.
> 
> This won't be updated as frequent as my other story but I _will_ try to post at least once a week with much shorter chapters. Also, this story will not go the way you think (I'm still not sure how it will end) but I have a clear idea of how I want it to progress. Will it be a romance? It certainly will, just in a twisted way. And it will be painful and agonizing because I love making Anakin suffer. 
> 
> Once again, don't hate on this and I hope you will enjoy it enough to leave kudos and comments <3

You were running late, again. This was the second time you’ve missed the bus, now hastily running through the crowded streets of your little town, trying to make it on time to your internship. You couldn’t miss it. Your whole career depended on you taking on a patient at a hospital you were interning in. This was the last year of your internship, one year away from becoming a doctor. And today was the day you’d be given your own patient, critically ill or perhaps disabled in their own way. After all, you wanted to specialize in tough cases, leaning towards neurosurgery, sports medicine or neuromuscular medicine and physiatry. You had years of experience tucked in under your belt and you were sure you were ready to take on the big role. You’ve been under great care of many doctors and nurses for the past five years, watching them treating the patients and assisting with surgeries. Now was your turn to take on that role and help someone with their life. You barely made it inside the hospital before the clock struck eight in the morning.

“There you are,” one of the nurses greeted you when you stumbled inside the employee room, changing out your street clothes into scrubs and a white jacket. “I thought you weren’t going to make it.”

“How could I possibly miss this?” you smiled, hastily pulling your hair into a bun. “How do I look?” you asked, hanging your stethoscope around your neck as you clipped your ID card to the outside of your jacket. 

“Like you are ready to take on the world,” the nurse smiled and you simply nodded before running off into the restricted area of the hospital, allowed to be accessed only to those that had the clearance. Here was where some of the most critically injured patients were located, and you’ve met almost all of them. You hastily approached Dr. Omar, the head surgeon of the hospital, his back turned to you before you cleared the throat. 

“This is the second time you’ve arrived late,” Dr. Omar turned around to give you a pointed look. “If you’re not serious about this, then perhaps we can reassign you to a different department—”

“No, please,” you exclaimed, hoping the pleading look in your eyes would soften the man’s heart and his decision. “I’m sorry. It would never happen again, I swear. _Please_ , I really want this internship.” 

Dr. Omar stared at you before sighing, looking down at the clipboard in his hands, his eyes sweeping over some information that was written on there. 

“We have received a new patient a little over five hours ago,” he slowly started and you perked up at that. “Critically injured, with all his limbs severed in a car crash, over 85% of his body burned by third degree burns. One of the most severe cases we’ve ever come across.”

You exhaled, the said information making you uneasy. “And he is still _alive_?” you slowly asked, having a hard time believing that someone would survive something like that.

“Take a look for yourself,” Dr. Omar handed you a pad and you scrolled through some images taken at the scene of the car crash, the car looking unrecognizable through the wreck, its interior and exterior burned, leaving only the metal carcass of the vehicle. And amidst all that you recognized a silhouette of a body strapped to the driver's seat as the EMT tried to take him out of the car.

“He was inside of the car the whole time it burned?” you exclaimed, your eyes widening at the images of a body unrecognizable, covered in charcoal skin, all the clothes melted off with the skin, some parts of the body blackened beyond what was considered normal, as though you were looking at wood logs burned by the campfire and not someone’s skin. The sight of his missing limbs doing nothing to help the situation. How this person was still alive was beyond you. 

“He is still alive,” Dr. Omar confirmed your earlier question. “But for how long that is the question I cannot answer. The surgeons spent most of the last few hours patching him up the best they could. There is not a lot they can do for someone in _that_ state.”

“Why was he not transported to the city?” you asked, frowning. “Wouldn’t the bigger hospital have more equipment and more resources to help him?”

“Because we believe the man will die within the next 24 hours,” Dr. Omar sighed. “On top of the exterior injuries, his interior organs had also been damaged. His throat and vocal cords are burned, his lungs are ruined, he is on a ventilator as we speak, his heart failed three times and had to be shocked to keep him alive. He is now hooked up to the pacemaker, along with other equipment to keep him alive. No human can survive something so horrendous as being burned alive.”

You continued reading the details, each information more shocking than the other. Yet something stirred at your heart when one picture focused on the man’s face, miraculously less burned than the rest of his body, with prominent scars running down his hollow cheeks and his head, now bald and scarred from the burned hair. He looked so _young_. 

“What is his name?” you asked, taking in his appearance, the curve of his nose and the strength of his jaw captivating you. You felt like you knew this man before, had seen him from somewhere but you couldn’t place where. 

“We don’t know. All the identification that he had on him, if he had them with him at the time of the crash, had been burned. No one had claimed him as of yet. Perhaps soon his family would hear of the tragedy and let us know of his identity.”

You took a shaky breath. “I want him to be my patient.”

“[Y/N], this man will not survive more than a day,” Dr. Omar told you with kindness in his tone. “You can pick any other patient on this floor.”

  
You shook your head, your mind already set on your decision. “I want _him_.”


	2. Patient.

Sounds of harsh wheezing breaths were the first thing that your ears picked up on even before you fully stepped inside the room, the sounds overriding the steady hum of the ventilator machine and the pacemaker, along with other medical equipment surrounding the bed. You thought you were prepared for what you were going to see, but nothing prepared you at the sight of a human body, barely recognizable under all the wires and tubes sticking out of it, the body itself wrapped around in sterile gauze, except for the patient’s face.

But even uncovered, his face was hidden from your view from where you stood at the end of the bed, the breathing tubes sticking out of his throat and nose, with a clear mask covering half of his face, along with the nasty bruises and blistering swells covering the top of his head, making an overall quite a gnarly appearance. You were the only one in the room, all the ER nurses and doctors had finished dressing him up and hooking him up to the machines only an hour prior to you arriving at the hospital. You slowly made your way to the side of the bed to take a closer look at him. 

You could see where his limbs were amputated, a necessity after his own were crushed in the accident to avoid infection and necrosis of his flesh, his stumps heavily wrapped around in tight seals, covered by plastic to prevent more blood loss, but still you could see that the bandages would have to be changed again pretty soon as the blood started to seep through the material. Your eyes swept past his abdomen where part of his pacemaker pump was inserted through the hole in his stomach in order to connect the tube to his heart to supply adequate oxygen and assistance to his weak heart, after he’d already had three heart failures back to back. Multiple IVs were inserted through his veins either on his upper arms or through his neck, supplying adequate fluids, necessary antibiotics and drugs to keep him as much pain-free and sedated as anyone could in this situation. He had another hole cut out in the front of his neck, a tube running through it and inside his trachea in order to supply his damaged lungs with forceful puffs of oxygen and necessary nutrients through a feeding tube. A pulse oximeter was attached to him, relaying all the needed information on the display in front of you and you frowned when you looked at his oxygen level. It was too low. He could certainly end up with brain damage should he survive the first night. 

You looked down at your iPad you carried with you, reading all the supplying information on this patient. His age and name were yet to be known yet you presumed he was in his early twenties, a few years younger than yourself and you shuddered from the uncomfortable feeling that thought evoked from you. He was so young and yet his life was already a hellish nightmare which had just begun if he were to pull through. The recovery of such a horrific accident would take years. He would most likely need constant assistance, not just with the ability to move but things such breathing on his own, or even eating. He had many complications ahead of him and you vowed you'd help him through with any of it if he survived. 

A noise on the heart monitor startled you and you looked up to see a sudden spike in blood pressure, earlier reading much lower than normal. You looked down and almost dropped your iPad when you saw the patient's eyes wide open, the corneas in his eyes bloodshot red and swollen, his pupils wide and unseeing as he tried to move and gasp for breath. You shrieked in horror, immediately drawing his attention to you and you froze in complete dread when his gaze met yours.  _ There was so much pain in his eyes.  _

He tried to move again, tried to say something but it just came out garbled and raspy, him struggling for breaths as he wheezed, the sound terrifying you as though someone was scraping metal against the glass surface and you instantly snapped to action, leaning over him and trying to appear as calm as you could while you pushed the button for help on the wall by his bed. 

“Don’t try to talk, please,” you said, keeping your gaze on him even though you wanted to turn away each time you looked at those unseen eyes, his corneas all but burned in the fire, his eyes filled with blood and so  _ dry _ it hurt to even think to blink. 

The man refused to listen, his blood pressure spiking up even higher as he wailed in scream, the tubes inside his mouth and throat muffling the horrifying sounds. You couldn’t even place your hands on his shoulders to keep him still, doing so would tremendously hurt him, his skin covered in third-degree burns all over his body, more prominent around his torso and chest. He tried to move his body again and the monitor beeped in warning. He was going into shock. 

“Listen to me,” you tried again, panic settling in your voice. “Everything will be alright,  _ but you need to calm down. _ ”

The doors to the room finally swung open and several nurses dashed in, swarming the patient’s bed as one of them adjusted the IV with his drugs to increase the dose of his anesthesia and pain medicine. 

“Why wasn’t he put to sleep?” you snapped, glaring at the new nurse who had recently started working at the hospital right out of school. 

“We did,” she insisted with a high pitch voice. “We gave him enough to keep him sedated for days. The anesthesia simply  _ does not work _ on him!”

You frowned, looking down at the patient, him writhing in pain and continuing to scream, the machines all around you starting to beep in warnings. He was overloading all of them with his panic attack, and if you didn’t manage to calm him down in time you knew he’d die from going into shock. 

“Boost it up,” you ordered, leaning over the patient as you caught his terrified and pained gaze with your eyes. “You have a tube going down your throat that prevents you from talking,” you calmly said, hoping he could understand you through his own haze of excruciating pain. “Let it do all the work for you, try to calm down. The medicine will soon kick in.”

The man’s eyes, you thought you could see a hint of blue in his irises, stared at you, silently pleading with you to end his pain. You shook your head, giving the man your own silent answer that your job was to save his life not end it. He writhed for another minute, choking back on a sob, his tear ducts swelling up but all burnt away that he couldn’t even cry and you counted down the seconds until the anesthesia and pain drugs would enter his system, making his nightmare go away even for a moment sending him into oblivion of unconsciousness. 

You thought you heard a distinct cry in your head for someone calling out to a name you’ve never heard of. 

_ Padme.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry :( Poor Ani.
> 
> I hope I wrote the medical stuff accurately enough to not deter from the story. I did my google research. And I lied, I couldn't contain my excitement from continuing updating the story so soon. I hope you liked it enough...


	3. Brother.

“Blood pressure is stabilized,” one of the nurses announced and you sighed in relief. At least one problem was taken care of at the moment. 

Your focus shifted to his limbs, or what was left of them, the bandages now completely soaked through with the man’s blood. It was time to change the dressing and apply more pressure on the amputated limbs, something you’ve done before but were dreading to do at the moment. You were scared to touch him, terrified that you'd cause him more pain by peeling off the gauze around his burned flesh and taking off chunks of his molten skin. 

You washed your hands, and with the help of nurses donned your sterile gown and gloves, preparing for the task ahead of you. You spent a good few hours working on the bandages, peeling them off while the nurses applied pressure on the arteries with a tourniquet. The area around the amputated limbs was raw, the skin cauterized around the edges to prevent infection. If the bleeding persisted you’d have to freeze his limbs in ice packs so you kept a close eye on the bleeding while you applied new dressings around the stumps of his limbs, careful in your movements. 

By the time you were done it was lunchtime and you excused yourself to take a quick breath of fresh air. The smell of medicine and burned flesh permeated your senses and clothes, and you choked back on the smell of coffee, its black color reminding you of the color of the patient’s skin. That was another thing you dreaded, washing away the necrotic flesh and dead skin and applying antibacterial ointments to the raw areas. You already knew how painful it would be for the patient, and you hoped the anesthesia would work for the duration of the rest of your shift. 

You made your way back to the room, the nurses finishing up with their duties around the patient, checking the fluid bags and IV pumps and changing out the waste bags while you stood by the foot of the bed, watching the rise and fall of the man’s chest, his breathing still raw and wheezing. It sounded like the death itself had stood on his chest, slowly suffocating the man. 

“Call us if you need help,” the voice of the nurse snapped you from your thoughts and you simply nodded, still looking at the man lying in front of you. There was still no news of who this man was, no family or relatives to claim him and report him missing. The town you lived in was small, so perhaps the man was simply passing through the area when the unfortunate accident happened, causing him to be hooked up to a life support, most likely for the remainder of his life. 

You double checked the ventilator, fumbling with the settings until you felt a distinct pressure in your head and you winced, feeling an onset of a headache. Strange. You shook your head, resuming your work until you felt it again. A twinge. You frowned, shutting your eyes as you felt more pressure in your head, a sense of discombobulation and then a distinct screaming reverberating through your head and all around you. 

You opened your eyes and instantly drew a sharp breath, the setting of a hospital room all but gone and replaced with the one you’ve never been to or seen before. Lava and molten rocks were all around you, the red haze of the area surrounding you, the sulfur suffocating and burning your lungs, your eyes tearing up from hot gases and arid atmosphere. What was this place?

Another scream, someone calling for help. You glanced around yourself and then stopped in your tracks when you saw something at the edge of the rocks by the rivers of lava. No, not something.  _ Someone _ . Someone was burning alive, consumed by the flames of fire, screaming in agonizing pain, their voice carrying across the barren landscape. You tried to move, tried to run to help them but your feet were stuck, an unseen power holding you back and not letting you move. You tried to scream, but even your voice was muffled, a mere whisper escaping your throat, a broken cry for help. 

_ You were my brother Anakin. I loved you.  _

A man’s voice, anguished and broken carried across to you and you watched in horror, unable to turn away or do anything else but stay rooted to the spot and witness the body continue to be consumed by flames, the clothes and skin all but melted, leaving a charred remnants of the man behind. 

You gasped in shock, stumbling over your feet and then the world titled and you fell down, a hard floor of the hospital room jolting you awake. You realized you were crying, silent tears streaming down your face, your eyes wide and staring at the ceiling. What  _ was _ that?

A beep startled you, the heart monitor once again blaring in warning and you immediately jumped to your feet, only to find the man already wide awake and gasping for breaths just like the first time. His eyes immediately landed on you, his gaze much clearer than last time but filled with pain and agony and silent pleading, now more pronounced.

“You shouldn’t be awake,” you numbly said, staring at him with wide eyes, your mind refusing to believe that he was awake from all the medicines being pumped in his system. No one should have been awake from the doze he’d already been given. 

The man moaned, his blood pressure spiking up again and you silently cursed, your body finally moving towards the machines and the IV pump, adjusting his dose with your shaky hands. The dream, or whatever it was, had greatly affected you but you refused to dwell on it. Your primary goal was to get his vitals stabilized and get him sedated  _ again _ . 

You doubled the dose, all the while keeping your gaze on him, his eyes still wide open and staring back at you. 

“Just hold on for a little while longer,” you told him, trying to keep your voice stable. 

The man moaned in response and you shook your head, working with the IV pump. Few more seconds, you told yourself. Just until he fell asleep and then you can figure out what the hell was going on with him and with the dream. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to rewatch the clip of Obi-Wan telling Anakin the same words I put in my story and I teared up :( that was one hell of a messed up scene, so many emotions and feelings in those words. Now I'm going to go to bed feeling all sad.


	4. Impossible.

“Is there anyone in the database of our system by the name of Anakin?” you asked one of the front desk people after your shift was over. It was almost ten o’clock at night and you were thoroughly tired.

“That’s an odd name,” the receptionist replied, looking through the system for anyone by that name. “I would have remembered it if anyone had actually checked in recently,” she continued, browsing through the hospital’s system. The town was small, so most people living here were registered into the hospital’s database.

“Nope, don’t see one by that name,” she replied, glancing up at you. “Why?”

You shook your head. “It’s nothing, really. Just something I thought I’d check first. Thank you anyways,” you tiredly smiled, waving her a goodbye as you were ready to head out home. 

Today had been exhausting and you were craving a good night’s sleep. Just as you were about to head into the staff’s backroom area and change out of your scrubs, an insistent headache started forming at the back of your head, making you wince. You barely made it inside the room before you almost collapsed, your head feeling like it was about to explode. Something did not feel right and you wailed in pain, grasping your head with your hands as you leaned against the wall, corners of your eyes stinging from tears. It  _ hurt _ . 

_ Where is Padme? _

You almost jumped out of your skin, whirling around to stare around the empty room, looking for the source of voice. It sounded strained, broken, barely a whisper and you shook your head, placing the voice as your imagination, most likely a result of the exhaustion you were feeling and the headache that would  _ not _ go away. 

You made it to your locker, reaching for the bag with your clothes, hastily changing out of your scrubs, all the while rubbing at your temples, the headache only getting worse. You gritted your teeth before rummaging through your bag for some Motrin, fumbling with the lid before you heard that voice again.

_ Is she safe? Is she alright? _

You yelped this time, dropping the bottle of pain medicine and spilling its contents on the table. You did not imagine it this time, the voice was much louder and more insistent than before, a hint of desperation in its tone. And it was definitely male. You looked around the empty room, turning around on the spot, looking for  _ anyone _ or  _ anything _ to justify the voice. You must have been more tired than you first thought if now you were hallucinating the voice. 

A beeping sound resonated in the silence of the room and you frowned, glancing down at the device laying on the table in front of you, blinking red and insistently beeping. Your heart clenched, dropping all your stuff as you grabbed the device. It was a call light and coming directly from the room the unidentified patient was in. Someone was signaling for help. But if another medical provider needed help, they’d directly call the hospital line, there was no point calling you directly, especially off duty. Unless it was  _ his  _ doing. 

_ Impossible _ , you thought. He was asleep, had been so since your earlier incident. He had been heavily drugged, much more so than any other ordinary person ever needed. You ensured he’d been given a constant supply of drugs before leaving, placing an overnight shift nurse to tend after him with another on-call doctor on site. 

Yet, you still hastily ran through the silent and otherwise empty hospital, clutching the device in your hands. You only had a few precious minutes to get to him on time. What if it was something serious? What if he was  _ dying _ ? But the closer you got to the room he was in, the less of a pressure you had in your head, your headache lessening until you no longer felt it. You had a growing suspicion that he was awake and waiting for you. You couldn’t shake the feeling that it was his doing, despite how deranged that idea sounded to you. 

You barged into the room, expecting to see at least someone in the room with him, yet it was empty and silent, except for the sounds of medical equipment whirring and beeping in the quietness of the room, accompanied by the raspy and labored breathing of the patient. You looked to the side of the wall, above the patient's head to see a bedside button still blinking red, sending its signal directly to your device that you clutched in your hand. There was no way he could have reached it himself, not with the state his body was in, limbless and bandaged and hooked up with wires and tubes.

But even before you saw his face, you knew his eyes were open, his gaze trained on you standing by the door, trying to catch your breath. You slowly advanced inside the room, confirming your earlier suspicions by meeting his gaze with your own, you two silently staring at one another. 

He didn’t move, not like the first time he’d awoken from his sedated state, his vitals spiking up from his apparent shock and pain. He was more reserved, appearing almost lifeless laying on the bed, hooked up to all the machinery surrounding him, his bandaged chest rising and falling with the help of the ventilator pumping oxygen into his damaged lungs. He didn’t utter a single sound, simply watching you with his bloodshot eyes, making you feel unnerved and unsure of what to do with him. You’ve already exhausted any means to try and keep him sedated, any higher dose would simply kill him. 

_ Where is she? _

You jumped, the voice inside your head much louder and insistent than before as though the person speaking those words was inside the room with you. You quickly glanced around the room until finally settling your gaze back down on his face, his eyes still trained on you. Your eyes widened in shock when you finally realized their source. 

It was  _ him _ . However improbable and far-fetched it sounded, you truly believed it was him speaking with you  _ inside _ your mind. And however impossible it all seemed, your body tensed, shivering from your own shock and fear as you gazed at him with your own wide eyes, refusing to acknowledge the truth, albeit it plainly staring back at you. The man was telepathic.

You never recalled yourself ever feeling such fear like the moment alone in the room with him. All you could do was run, leaving the room in haste and paging the nurse for help as you left him behind, refusing to dwell on the look of his own fear and helplessness radiating in his eyes when you backed away from him, silently pleading with you to come back. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, let's admit it. We'd all be terrified and unnerved if someone was speaking to us using telepathy. I mean what's the probability of it actually existing in our world?


	5. Voice.

“You seem on edge,” one of the nurses had told you when you walked in the next day and you smiled back, albeit a little more tightly.

“Oh, I’m fine,” you lied, deciding to omit the part that you were definitely losing your mind if you heard the patient talking to you through your own mind. Everyone would think you were crazy.

“How’s our patient?” you asked, deciding to switch the subject and focus on the issue at hand. 

“Stabilized,” she replied, gathering the needed supplies to perform a dressing change. You were currently helping her place the needed gauze and other sterilized items in a cart. You needed to change the bandages that had become soiled in the past twenty four hours of the patient arriving at the ICU. No one had said anything about the fact that it was simply a miracle that the patent had survived, although the speculations were going around the hospital as to how long that fact would remain so. No one had enough hope that he would actually survive. No one but you. Something told you he would survive, that he was much stronger than what he appeared to be. You didn’t know where that conviction was coming from. 

You also couldn’t tell anyone that you wanted to avoid him at all costs. After last night you were thoroughly terrified of the man, of his abilities, of what was true and a reality and what was simply your fantasy. How much of last night did you come up with yourself, your tired mind conjuring memories that did not belong to you? Maybe you had an undiagnosed mental illness that you were not aware of— 

“After you left last night we could hardly put him back to sleep,” the nurse’s voice snapped you back to the present. “We’ve tried almost everything. It’s like his body is rejecting the narcotics.”

“Have they done the blood work on him?” you asked, your interest piqued. 

“As a matter of fact, we did,” she replied as you both stopped in front of the door leading into his room. “The lab found an interesting component inside his blood stream.”

“A component?” you asked, entering behind her into the room, relief washing over you when your eyes landed on his face, his eyelids closed. He was asleep. 

The nurse simply handed you the results on the iPad. “Take a look for yourself.”

And indeed, as you scrolled through the lab work, you noticed that this particular patient had a large number of unknown substances circulating through his blood stream. Drugs? Some sort of genetic disorder? Or something else?

“This was sent to the pathologist?” you asked, setting the iPad down. 

“Yes,” she replied, as she donned her surgical gloves, preparing to take down the bandages. “I must warn you that he is simply sleeping. The head doctor decided to stop supplying him with the sedatives. He is just on the pain medications currently.”

You looked up in startlement. “He _what_?”

“His system can’t take much more of the sedatives in his current state. Doing so will inadvertently place him in a coma. He is more likely to remain stable by being supplied with pain medication while being cognitive of his surroundings.”

You shook your head. “That is _inhumane_ ,” you argued. “Just touching him will set him into intense levels of pain. And you want to change out his dressings while he is _awake_ ?”  
  


“Do you have a better idea?” she turned around, her own displeasure written in her eyes. “These are the doctor’s orders. And we must follow them.”

“Sometimes orders are meant to be broken,” you hissed under your breath to which the nurse simply raised her eyebrow, shrugging her shoulders as she resumed her work.

And just as you suspected, his eyes snapped open as soon as you started removing the dressing around his chest and his torso, careful with your movements around all the tubes connected to his body.

“I’m sorry,” you quietly told him, because truly you were very much sorry for his state. He simply groaned, then quietly wailed, his eyes shutting closed as you quietly worked around his broken body. The only response that he was feeling anything at all were occasional twitches of his arms and soft grunts that escaped his charred lips, but otherwise he remained motionless until the nurse started washing his body with an antimicrobial combination of soap to clean off the necrotic tissue. 

His body jerked, setting off the heart monitor in the process, his eyes snapping open as he glared at the woman with an unnatural perceptiveness and anger of someone who was heavily pumped with narcotics. You freezed your own movements, staring at him with wide eyes until his gaze snapped to yours.

_Get rid of her_ , the voice snarled in your head and you gasped, dropping the cloth you grabbed to wash him with in process, staggering away from the bed in haste. 

“Are you okay?” the nurse asked, her voice panicked as she watched you with a concerned look.

“I...I’m—” you struggled with words, your body shuddering from the unnatural chill overtaking you. Yet you refused to formulate a response, your gaze automatically drifting towards his stilled figure, his eyes still trained on you. 

“We better finish this,” the nurse continued, resuming her work as she neared his burned flesh with a sponge. “I’ll try to be gentle, okay? Just bear with me for a few minutes and it will be all over,” she continued, trying to soothe him with her words, missing the murderous look he sent her way.

_Don’t touch me_ , the voice snarled again, this time much louder in your head, making you gasp in pain. You felt a weird sensation overtaking you, a _whirl_ of something in the air as it passed by you, until the cart with the supplies you brought with you had toppled over, spilling everything on top of it all over the floor. 

“Oh my!” the nurse exclaimed, pausing her movements. “I must have knocked it over or something—”

“Why don’t you take a break while I’m finishing up?” you supplied, hoping your suggestion would make the nurse take the hint that she was unwelcomed in the room by none other than the patient himself.

“Are you sure? We just started this. It will take you much longer than if it was the two of us—”

“I’m sure,” you smiled, ushering her out of the door. “I can take care of this. You were up all night, let me do this while you rest up. I’ll buzz for you if I need your help.”

You closed the door behind her, taking a shuddering breath. You were now all alone with him _again_. You could feel his gaze boring into your back and you took time to compose yourself. When you turned around his eyes were still trained on you.

“Did you do this?” you motioned towards the cart still laying sideways on the floor. When he failed to respond you shook your head, becoming aggravated with him. Maybe you _were_ crazy as you thought. Maybe the voice inside your head was all imaginary. 

You sighed, picking up the supplies off the floor before reassembling everything on the cart, pulling out new sterile gauze. Just when you finished washing your hands and donning sterile gloves, the voice inside your head wormed itself back before you could touch him with your hands.

_What are you doing?_ the voice asked, sounding suspicious and angry and you flinched once more before setting your gaze on his face. 

“I need to wash you,” you told him quietly, patiently, with a hint of trepidation in your voice. Even if the voice inside your head was not real, you still wanted to let him know what it was you were about to do to prepare him.

_Don’t bother_ , the voice snapped and you frowned from viciousness in its tone.

“I need to remove necrotic tissue off of you,” you clarified, trying not to sound too exasperated with him. “If I don’t do that there’s a chance it will become infected.”

_Leave it_ , the voice snarled and you felt another twinge in the air.

“I can’t,” you told him, shaking your head. “This will allow for your body to heal, otherwise the skin grafts will never work on you—”

_I said_ **_leave_** _it._

This time you definitely felt like something was holding on to your hand, an invisible grip that you couldn’t shake off and your gaze flickered towards his face to see him glaring at you.

“And I said that I _can’t_ ,” you calmly told him, albeit a little too harshly for your liking, staring unflinchingly into his eyes. “Now please, let me finish changing these dressings on you. You will feel much better once I’m done.”

_I highly doubt it_ , the voice answered, plain sarcasm leaking into its tone. 

It was quiet for the duration of your work, until he finally, surprisingly, fell asleep while you were finishing dressing him up, inadvertently trailing your fingers along his scarred face, smoothing hard lines along the few patches of unscarred areas of his skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eh, Anakin can still be an ass even when the reader tries to help him :/
> 
> I had a writer's block for this chapter and this sort of happened within the last hour so I hope this chapter was presentable enough for your liking.


	6. Memory.

You just finished looking through the reports sent back from the pathologist and you were very addled to say the least. None of the readings made sense, the ‘component’ found in the patient’s blood were life organisms that were part of the patient’s system yet acted on their own, separate from the rest of the circulation system in his blood. It just made absolutely no sense. And what made it worse was the fact that these reports were sent to the CDC to be evaluated. If that ever came back as anything more, you were more than sure the patient would be transferred over to their own unit for further ‘research’. That idea did not sit well with you. 

It’s been about a week since he was brought to the hospital and so far his condition remained the same. It was almost the same routine with him as any other day. He would have his bandages changed at least twice a day with one of the needed baths in between to clean off the sloughing necrotic tissue off of his body and then coated with antibiotic ointments and creams to help speed up the healing process. Some of the superficial burns had started to scab, more around his face and neck where the damage was less severe. The rest of his body did not fare as well, and it would take weeks before the burns would heal completely. Which pushed his skin grafting surgery further out. 

The machines kept doing the needed work to keep pumping his heart and deliver oxygen to his damaged lungs and it didn’t seem like he was ready to be weaned off the ventilator support any time soon. Your main concern was the damage that could be done from repeated forceful intrusion of air into his lungs, which could collapse them even more. Not to mention the threat of pneumonia which he was closely monitored for. Any infection could end up lethal in his case. 

And then there was the issue with his eyes and their damage. You knew he was evaluated by an ophthalmologist, and you knew that his vision was blurred and skewed, making it hard for him to focus on anything beside anything within a foot of distance in front of him. His corneas were burned, but at least that could be repaired by removing the damaged tissue and replacing it with an artificial cornea. But that involved another surgery, one he was certainly not ready for. So for now he relied heavily on some eye drops to help with the dryness and redness, which in the past week had gotten much better.

He refused to talk to you (in your mind) ever since the episode with the nurse and the past week had flown by rather quickly, with you periodically checking up on him and evaluating his signs. He also had refused to look at you, while he laid awake on the bed, staring lifelessly at the ceiling in front of him. Doing so dried out his eyes much quicker, which you had repeatedly told him the last few times you went to check on him, thus needing to give him more of the eye drops. But it appeared he was not even remotely interested in anything you had to tell him. 

You found him in the same state you left him in when you walked back inside the room after your lunch, still staring with wide eyes at the ceiling, barely blinking his eyelids. You sighed as you approached him, already preparing to administer more eye drops. The lighting inside the room had to be kept at minimum brightness ever since he refused to comply with the nurses’ requests to keep his eyes closed. So you treaded cautiously to his bed, while your own eyes adjusted to the dim lights. You were just finishing up with eye drops when his voice finally emerged inside your head, startling you in your spot.

_Where am I?_

Your gaze flickered up to his face, finding his eyes still starting lifelessly up ahead. You weren’t sure why but you felt relieved that you finally heard his voice inside your head after a week of silence. 

“You are in a hospital,” you answered, somewhat tentative with your answers, still unsure if you were imagining his voice inside your head. 

_Which hospital?_

You named the hospital of the town while still watching his face and you caught a slight frown gracing his features at the mention of the name. 

_Which planet am I on?_

Now it was your turn to frown when you looked at him. “Earth, of course,” you answered as though it was the most common knowledge, appalled that he would even ask such a thing. Did he also suffer from a memory loss—

_Earth?_ His voice sounded unsure, a crease appearing in the middle of his forehead in between where his eyebrows should have been, burned by the fire. _Which part of the Galaxy is this_ **_Earth_** _located in?_

Okay, now you were starting to get concerned. “Milky Way,” you answered as you leaned over him. “Perhaps I should have them scan your brain as well to determine a memory loss—”

_My memory is **fine**_ , he spat with such vehemence that you instinctively flinched. It was silent after that and you watched him with concern in your eyes, unsure if you should even continue with the rest of your check up on him. 

Just as you started to gather your supplies you heard him again. _It would be wise for you to contact Coruscant Medical and transport me there. My master expects my return._

You watched him in silence, your mind running wild with many possibilities of what his request could mean. You’ve never heard of this Coruscant Medical he spoke of unless it was located in another country. And what was the deal with him mentioning his _master_? An odd thing to say for sure. 

When you failed to answer him he finally turned his gaze to look at you. _Did you not hear what I said?_

“I did,” you answered, stumbling over your words from the look in his eyes. “And where is this hospital you speak of located? I’ve never heard of—”

_Are you that incompetent to not know of Coruscant? Or perhaps you think playing a fool will save you from my master’s wrath?_

“I don’t appreciate your tone,” you finally snapped, getting fed up with his condescending tone. “I don’t have the knowledge of all the hospitals across the globe. Only the big ones that are located in the United States.”

_The what?_ he asked, sounding confused. 

“United States,” you repeated through your clenched teeth. “The country you’re currently located in. Don’t tell me that your memory is fine if you can’t even remember a simple thing such as this.”

He stared at you with an odd look in his eyes. _What year is it?_ he finally asked with a meek tone, so different from the earlier angry one he used to yell at you. 

You sighed, deciding to humor him. You would still order those brain scans to perform several of the tests. This man was clearly not right in the head. 

“It’s 2020,” you answered which earned you another confused look from your patent. “Now, please try to get some sleep. I will be back later tonight to check on you.”

_Wait a minute—_

His voice sounded panicked, desperate for you to come back but you already crossed the room in big strides to leave him be, intending to do some research about the information he’d given to you in your short span of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anakin reminds me of a snapping turtle.
> 
> Why, you ask? Because his words hurt more than his actions. And plus my dogs are always snapping at each other which is quite hilarious to look at. Thus I call them my snapping turtles.


	7. Visions.

You racked your brain, tugging on your hair as you stared at the screen. In any of your Google's searches there was not even  _ one _ mention of Coruscant, neither a city, a village, nor even a body of water as you looked through the Earth’s geography. Every single time your search came back empty. You sighed again. This made absolutely no sense. 

You were already on your third cup of coffee and the day wasn’t even close to being over. You glanced at the clock, you had to be back at your patient’s bedside in the next few minutes. You had a feeling he was expecting you. 

You reluctantly made your way back to the room, surprised to see your patient actually fast asleep, his eyelids closed and the skin fluttering under his eyes, the shortness of his breaths and the spike in his blood pressure indicating he was having a nightmare. You immediately came over to his side, getting ready to gently wake him up. You didn’t want to risk another episode of his panic attack, or worse, a heart failure from the strain of his nightmares. You barely even touched him when the world tipped over and you were jolted into an abyss with a silent scream.

Voices. You heard voices.

Your head was spinning, your ears ringing. You felt like you were falling, the swift air suffocating you, making you gasp for breaths. 

A flash of light. 

_ Something wonderful has happened. Ani, I’m pregnant. _

A whisper of a voice. A woman’s voice, soft and melodic. It lulled you to its source, your hearing sharpening. 

_...This is a happy moment. The happiest moment of my life.  _

You heard that voice from somewhere before. It was a man’s voice, strong, with a hint of huskiness to it. The same voice you’ve been hearing in your head. Could it be…?

_ It was only a dream… You die in childbirth.  _

A shift, a ripple around you. Something dark brewing on the horizon. 

_ Careful you must be when sensing the future, Anakin. The fear of loss is a path to the dark side. _

_ I won’t let these visions come true, Master Yoda.  _

A pang of pain mixed with joy. You were suffocating.

_ You are strong and wise, Anakin, and I am very proud of you. I have trained you since you were a small boy. I have taught you everything I know. And you have become a far greater Jedi than I could ever hope to be.  _

Another voice, more urgent.

_ Only through me can you achieve a power greater than any Jedi. Learn to know the Dark Side of the Force and you will be able to save your wife from certain death.  _

A cry for help. Broken, mingled with tears. 

_ What have I done? _

_ You are fulfilling your destiny, Anakin.  _

The same scolding hot air was on your skin, the smell of sulphur filling your lungs. You’ve seen this place before. 

_ Anakin, all I want is your love. _

_ Love won’t save you, Padme. Only my new powers can do that.  _

A broken sob, a desperate plea. Your heart throbbed, a painful wave washing over you.

_ Anakin, you’re breaking my heart. You’re going down a path I can’t follow.  _

A white, hot searing rage. Your head throbbed from a headache, a crushing pressure on your skull. 

_ You turned her against me! _

_ You have done that yourself. _

_ You will not take her from me! _

Tears streaming down your face.

_ If you’re not with me then you’re my enemy.  _

The haze cleared, your eyes focused on the two figures facing each other. 

_ It’s over, Anakin. I have the high ground. _

_ You underestimate my power.  _

Everything was repeating itself. The same nightmarish scene started replaying itself before your eyes. You could not look away. Could not move. Could not breathe. 

_ You were the Chosen One! It was said that you would destroy the Sith, not join them! Bring balance to the Force, not leave it in darkness! _

_ I hate you! _

I hate you.

Hate.

Your lungs screamed for air. You heard a distinct beeping noise, alarms going off around you. Your hearing was still muffled, your senses on overdrive. You finally lurched from your spot, the vertigo hitting you with its intense wave that you collapsed on the hospital’s floor, managing to catch your fall with your hands as you gripped the railing of the patient’s bed.

You were wheezing, your face soaked with tears as you coughed up spit, your whole body shaking. This  _ vision _ , or whatever the hell it was, was worse than before. The headache was still there, throbbing pain shooting through your head, making you see hot flashes and white stars, your vision spinning.

And then you felt it. A grip on your neck. Your eyes snapped open, choking on the air.

_ How dare you. _

A voice,  _ his _ voice, inside your head, its viciousness startling you that you didn’t even realize you couldn’t breath, the stiffness around your neck intensifying. 

Your hands flew to your neck, feeling for the invisible grip that was slowly suffocating you. You scratched at the skin, gagging on the air, the lack of oxygen making you lose focus, your vision darkening.

“Your… name… “ you gasped, your voice rasped and broken. “It’s…  _ Anakin… _ “

You were suddenly released, collapsing on the hard floor by the bed, the pressure ceasing its hold on your neck as you violently started coughing, massaging your neck with your fingers, rubbing the tender skin, your mind slowly shutting down as you shook on the floor from your shock and near-death experience invoked on you. 

You didn’t even hear the door to the room opening and several nurses running in, shouting something as one of them tried lifting you up, only for you to collapse back on the floor. You didn’t even remember losing consciousness, just the glimpse of his eyes, staring back at you, the amber in them searing your soul. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone who'd been following my writing style in my other works knows how much I love putting these visions in them and make the stories that much more angsty and soppy. But that's just me. Also, the reader finally learns of her patient's name. Took a few chapters to get to that part but it was worth it :p


	8. Name.

You were apprehensive about going back to work. Ever since the incident with the patient — no, _Anakin_ , you were dreading to see him again, afraid of what else he might be able to do to you. You weren’t even sure if what you saw was true, didn’t even know what happened when the nurses finally dragged you away from the room. You thought you were simply losing your mind, your brain lacking capability to understand how any of what you saw and experienced was even possible.

You voluntarily took a medical leave of absence from work for a week, much to the scrutiny of the head surgeon but it was given to you with no questions asked. Your goal in mind was to clear your head and see a psychiatrist, the latter of which declared that you were mentally healthy and stable much to your own dismay. If your mental health was impeccable, then why were you being tormented by images of not your own and experiencing phantom touches that you couldn’t even properly explain to anyone without sounding insane? 

Your mind was too preoccupied when you entered the hospital to not notice the obvious presence of the police until you were heading straight for the ICU unit in the direction of Dr. Omar’s office until you stopped in your tracks, finally realizing that Dr. Omar was in the company of several police officers standing outside his office. He noticed you first, gesturing for you to come closer.

“Ah, [Y/N], I see you are finally back,” he greeted you once you stopped in front of him, looking at the closest police officer with an interest and a slight frown gracing your face.

“Is there something wrong?” you asked, looking between the head surgeon and the officers. 

“As a matter of fact there is,” Dr. Omar started and before you could quip in he continued. “Officers, this is [Y/N]. She’s been working directly with the patient of your interest for the past month. She’s just returned from her leave of absence. I’m sure she could tell you more on the pressing matter.”

You glanced over at the officer, your confusion discernible with a questioning look in your eyes. “I’m afraid I don’t understand?”

“Mam,” the nearest officer started and your eyes glazed over the man’s name badge. His name was Peter Edwards. “I have some questions about the unidentified patient that was brought to this hospital approximately a month ago. The burned victim found in the car crash.”

“Okay?” you slowly started, still confused as to why the police were involved. 

“We believe your patient was involved in the homicide incident prior to his accident,” officer Edwards continued and you gasped, your eyes widening.

“How — _how_ did you come to this conclusion?”

“The car the man was found in, it matches the description of the one he drove off after committing the murder,” the officer continued, presenting you with the evidence in the folder he held in his hand. “We need your help in identifying the man’s identity.”

You almost scoffed but refrained from doing so, hastily looking through the files presented to you. “The patient is severely burned, his features barely recognizable if not totally disfigured. I highly doubt I’m the right person to help you identify his identity based on looks—” you trailed off, your eyes widening.

In front of you was a page with the man’s information, the one the officers were looking for. Your eyes quickly skimmed through the page, noting the information about the man’s physical attributes.

_Age: 22_

_Height: 6’2_

_Hair color: dirty blond to brown_

_Eye color: blue_

You disregarded the rest of the information, skipping through the parts deemed unnecessary to you, trying to look for the information that would pertain to the patient lying in the hospital bed a few doors down. Until you turned a page, your breathing halting in your chest as you almost choked out a sob.

Staring back at you was the spitting image of the man you saw in your visions/dreams/hallucinations (you weren’t even sure at this point _what_ to call them), his blue eyes starting at the camera that took the shot, his features perfect and beautiful with the smooth tan skin void of any burnt scars and with a plentiful of messy wavy dirty blond hair sprawled around his face, almost as though the wind picked his silky locks when the image was taken. You simply couldn’t believe your eyes. This man looked _nothing_ like the one hooked up to the machines keeping him alive. 

“What did he do?” you hoarsely asked, lifting your head to look at the officer. “What crime did he commit?”

“Killed his own wife by choking her in their own home after he found out she was cheating on him with their best friend. He shot the guy in the chest with a gun,” officer Edwards responded, motioning for you to look further into file into gruesome details of the crime scene. “His wife was seven months pregnant.”

Your hands started shaking, your eyes prickling at the corners with some unshed tears. This all made sense. The snapshots of what you’ve witnessed, the man and woman you’ve been seeing in your wild dreams, the hurt, the betrayal. It all seemed so _real_. You didn’t want to believe it but there was no denying that the man was indeed the one—

Your eyes caught a glimpse of something at the top of the page. The man’s name.

_Alexander Walker._

“That’s— that’s his name?” you asked, lifting your gaze once more to look at the officer.

“Yes,” Edwards confirmed.

“That’s not _his_ name,” you blurted out and instantly regretted it when you saw the looks on the officers’ faces and the head surgeon.

“I beg your pardon?” Edwards asked as he narrowed his eyes. “Had the patient told you of his name then?”

“That’s simply not possible,” Dr. Omar interjected. “The patient is currently unable to talk due to having tracheostomy. And he’s hardly in any position to communicate with any of us.”

The officer turned his head to look at you. “Then what prompted you to—”

“I was mistaken,” you hastily interrupted the officer, avoiding looking at the man in front of you. “But looking at these images I’m afraid it would simply be impossible to identify the man based on looks alone. You would have to implement different measures to prove the man you are seeking is my patient.”

“I’m afraid my intern is correct,” Dr. Omar cut in. “The patient is too unstable at the moment to perform any sort of questioning or interrogation on your part, regardless of how futile I believe that endeavor to be based on his current state. I suggest you come back with a more concrete evidence of his involvement with the murder.”

“Then I will have one of the detectives stop by in the next few days to speak with you again, mam,” Edwards addressed you and you simply nodded, keeping your gaze unwavering as you stared at him. “In the meantime, if you come across any information pertaining to the case, please don’t hesitate to contact me,” he handed you his business card, which you took, pocketing it inside your white jacket. 

“If you’ll excuse me,” you muttered, handing the file back to Edwards. “But I must return back to work,” you nodded your head at Dr. Omar and without waiting for either party to stop you, you headed in the direction of your patient’s room, all too aware of the eyes on your back as the men watched you leave. 

You had much more pressing issues to deal with than worrying if they all thought your abrupt leave and change in your demeanor had anything to do with the name on file. Because it certainly did and you were determined to find out the truth from the man himself one way or another. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not everything as it seems.
> 
> Anyways, Alexander Walker - the name I thought sounded pretty modernized and close to Anakin Skywalker. Also, the stats are a little off, Anakin's height is slightly off, I took the height of Vader after a few inches were added with his cybernetic legs. 
> 
> If this is still too confusing to you, I'm sorry >< but this is where I wanted the story to go to. Bear with me for a little while longer to figure out where I'm going with this.
> 
> Thanks for reading ~


	9. Abnormal.

“Who are you?” was the first question you asked when you barged inside the patient’s room, finding him wide awake as though he was expecting you. His gaze instantly settled on you as you made your way towards his bed. 

“ _What_ are you?” you continued, hissing through your clenched teeth. “Because whatever _this_ is, it’s _not_ normal. None of this is.”

You expected to hear a nasty remark from him somewhere inside your head, instead the only thing greeted you were the sounds of machines working around the quietness of the room, only to be interrupted by the rhythmic wheezing sounds of the patient's breathing. 

“So now you’re not going to talk?” you scoffed, glaring at him. You practically rolled your eyes, this whole madness hardly making any sense. 

You glanced around the room, finding it just as you abruptly left it a week ago. Your gaze settled on the floor beside the bed, where you were found wheezing from lack of oxygen and near loss of consciousness from what felt like a ghost touch of hands strangling you. Your eyes snapped back to the patient’s face, his own eyes still trained on you. 

“Did you really try to _choke_ me?” you whispered, half appalled that he would even try to do something like that and half mortified that you were considering him capable of doing such a feat while strapped to the machines that barely kept him alive. 

“Am I going insane?” you asked out loud, the question meant to be rhetorical in a sense. “Because I feel like I am.”

You started pacing around the room, threading your fingers through your hair as you pulled on the strands. “I can’t believe this. I really am going crazy,” you laughed, a frantic sound escaping your lips. “What was I _thinking_?” you whispered, still pacing in the confines of a small space, barely paying any mind to the man lying in bed, following your every move with his eyes. 

“I should drop this case,” you muttered, talking out loud while trying to convince your inner sense that it was for the best. “That’s right, what kind of a doctor would I be if I continued on in such an unstable emotional—”

_Are species of your planet always so… hysterical?_

You paused mid step, whipping your head in his direction. “ _Excuse me?_ ”

You could have sworn that he _rolled_ his eyes at _you_ , the action so casual on a man that was barely even alive that it stumped you speechless. 

_I do not require a human’s help in my caretaking. You may as well send a droid for my care if you consider yourself unfit for this position._

“What?” you stared numbly at him. 

_A droid_ , the voice in your head replied, annoyance leaking through the tone. _Perhaps I misjudged your character. You appear to be much slower than some other species of your kind._

“Are you… trying to _insult_ me?” you asked with indignation in your tone. 

The look he sent you only confirmed that he indeed was trying to provoke you with his insulting remarks.

“You have a nerve,” you hissed, stalking up to his bed while fuming on the inside. “I’m your _doctor_ . I’m trying to _save_ your life while you dare to—”

_Futile attempt if you ask me_ , the voice cut you off mid sentence, only angering you more. 

“Futile? And why is that?” you asked, practically growling. “Are you that eager to die after what you’ve done?” as soon as the words left your mouth, you realized your mistake by the look in the man’s eyes as well as the unmistakable pressure back on your throat.

_You know nothing_ , the voice hissed. 

“I know _enough,_ ” you choked, trying to maintain whatever semblance of control you had left. “But that doesn’t give you… the _right_ … to do this,” you croaked, trying to take shallow breaths through the increasing pressure on your windpipe. 

_You don’t know what I’ve done_ , the voice growled, and just as swiftly the pressure was gone from your throat. _This is by far the least I could do to you._

You glared at the man, having an internal struggle with yourself to keep some of the words you would have liked to say to the man’s face but refrained from doing so. This man was clearly dangerous and deranged. And most likely a criminal and a killer. You weren’t about to become his next victim. 

“Very well,” you tersely said, spinning on your heels to walk out of the room. “This just confirms everything the police needs to know about your _real_ identity. I won’t be keeping them waiting then.”

_Wait._

You stopped before the door with your hand on the handle ready to flee from the room. Yet something in his tone stopped you. It was a hint of desperation that you unmistakably heard in his voice. 

_I need to know_ , the voice was hesitant, hurt. _What happened to Padme._

You turned around. “Who’s Padme?”

His eyes flickered to the ceiling. _She is my wife._

You stood still by the door with a wild look on your face. “You mean the wife you killed in your own home? By _choking_ her?” you rasped, your heart wildly beating inside your chest.

_What_ ? the voice sounded surprised, the patient's gaze flickering back down to you. _She wasn’t at home, she was with me when—_ the voice abruptly stopped. 

“When _what_?” you asked, your lower lip quivering. 

A ragged intake of breath from the man startled you, his body twitching as though he tried to untangle himself from the wires. 

“What are you doing?” you screamed, running up to him to try and prevent him from moving too much. 

_Is she dead?_ he was looking right at you with a sheen of tears in his eyes, the first you’ve seen in weeks. _Did I kill her?_

The question had caught you off guard, the intensity with which he gazed at you and the emotions behind his words tugging at the strings of your heart. This man truly did not know what happened to his wife. Was he the same man as the one the police were looking for?

“I don’t know,” you answered, your voice barely above whisper. “I can’t help you if I don’t know your true name.”

The man wailed, still struggling to move his broken body on the bed. “Please stop,” you begged him because even if you thought the man was a killer and he deserved some sort of punishment, none of it could compare to the agonizing pain he lived with every single waking moment of his life ever since the accident. 

_Mustafar_ , the voice rasped. _She was on Mustafar. I... I lost control. She shouldn’t have come… she should have never brought_ **_him_** _with her. It’s all_ **_his_** _fault!_

The readings on the screen started going up. “You need to try and calm down,” you calmly tried to tell him, worried that he might cause more strain on his feeble heart. 

_You don’t understand_ , the voice snarled, causing you to flinch. 

“No, I don’t,” you replied, meeting the man’s gaze with your own. “I think it’s best if someone else takes over your care—”

_No_ , the statement was so sudden and final that it made you frown. _You’re the only one who can hear me._

“What?” this revelation left you speechless. 

_No one else can_ , the voice continued. _You’re the only one._

You stared at one another, the world around you zooming on the person laying in front of you, the rest of the sounds muffled as you processed his words. 

“You tried to choke me,” you reminded him, still reeling from that fact that he tried to do it not once but twice.

_I know._

You huffed. “In my culture this type of behavior prompts at least some sort of an apology.”

_Anakin_ , the voice in your head echoed and you frowned.

“What?”

_My name_ , you heard it echo, albeit a bit grudgingly and reserved. _It’s Anakin Skywalker._

You thought that was the most bizarre way to apologize to someone but then you had to remind yourself that nothing about this situation or the person laying in front of you was normal, not even by a long shot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think we're making a little progress, don't you think?


	10. Tell.

“Is that really necessary?”

You had just finished with what you considered to be an interrogation by the detective sent from the police department regarding the case that was still pending. About the missing man responsible for the homicide of two people. And that the police strongly believed the man they were looking for was currently your patient hooked up to the machines next door.

“I’m sorry?” Detective Decker looked up from her notes to give you a questioning look.

“I mean all this,” you gestured towards the paperwork lying in front of you on the desk. “That you would resort to all this in order to confirm the patient’s DNA.”

“Unfortunately this is our only lead,” the detective answered, setting down her pen. “I’ve been told there were no calls regarding your patient, that no family reported someone missing, no one claimed this patient to be someone they knew. I even checked our database, no one fits the description of the male currently being treated at your hospital. But every lead points to the fact that the man we are looking for might be him.”

You shifted in your chair. “But doing something so invasive?” you started, looking at the paperwork. 

“We will have our forensics team take a look at this case first,” the detective reassured you. “You said the male had all of his teeth intact, is that correct?”

You nodded your head. “Then it shouldn’t be an issue in determining his identity based on the dental records,” the detective continued. “In most cases, that’s all our team needs. The last thing we want is to place more stress on the patient if we prove to be wrong.”

You suppressed a sigh. “When can we expect your team to pay us a visit?”

“If not today then tomorrow,” Decker answered. “I’m afraid this is time sensitive. We would like to get the answers we need as soon as we can. This case has been on hold for a month. The victims’ families need to know what happened.”

You nodded your head, feeling a sort of apprehension settling over your senses. “Of course,” you gave the detective a curt smile. 

“We’ll keep in touch,” Decker smiled back.

___

The blisters were healing, forming scabs around the more prominent burn areas. The ointments seemed to help keep the infection at bay. You no longer needed to use wraps and sterile gauze around his neck and chest, most of the focus was now on the lower part of his body where the necrotic tissue kept reappearing almost every day. You hoped he wouldn’t have to go through more surgeries to amputate whatever was left of his knees but there was a high chance the surgery was inevitable. The hospital was planning on conducting one anyways, to repair the damage done to the eyes and also install an implanted pacemaker which would then eliminate the need for the pump that was currently helping the patient pump his own blood. 

While you worked, your mind kept going back to the conversation you had earlier with the detective. Why were you so terrified to find out the truth? What if Anakin Skywalker  _ was _ Alexander Walker, the man that apparently killed his own wife and shot his friend. What if the patient himself was delusional, the emotional and physical damage causing psychological trauma to his brain. What if this whole time he was the one who was crazy?

_ You think too much. _

You blinked, raising your head to give Anakin a perplexed look to see him watching you. “ _ Excuse me? _ ” you weren’t expecting him to talk to you. 

_ I can see it on your face. You always frown when you think too hard or too much.  _

This was absurd. For someone to be in his state and still pay enough attention to minuscule details such as what you looked like when you were concentrating on a task. He was very observant and perceptive. 

You decided to ignore him, resuming your task which currently involved changing out the ventilator’s tubing, which required the utmost attention on your part.

_ Something is bothering you. _

Your lip twitched but you refrained from answering. 

_ Tell me. _

You let out an exasperated sigh, throwing a look his way which indicated your aggravation at the moment. “I never thought you’d be the one initiating the conversation after what happened the last time,” mainly the fact that he tried choking you not once but twice. 

He tried to mimic your look which almost made you scoff. Shaking your head you decided to humour him. “It appears you are going to have some more visitors either today or tomorrow.”

He tried to frown but the action was almost non-discernible on his scarred face. “The police are sending someone on their forensics team to gather some data on you,” you cleared your throat. “Mainly trying to identify you based on your dental records. They believe they uncovered your true identity.”

_ I highly doubt that. _

It was your turn to frown. “What do you mean?”

_ I am non-existent in your world _ , he replied, sounding very haughty and snarky in your head. 

“Right,” you rolled your eyes. “Because apparently you are not from Earth.”

_ I am not _ , he confirmed, his voice carrying across confidently and with a hint of irritation at what you believed to be his way of letting you know he was displeased with your reaction to his admission. 

“Okay then,” you had long stopped messing with the ventilator’s tubing, your focus solely on the man in front of you. “If you’re not from Earth, then where are you from? Where were you born? Lived?”

You didn’t miss the look in his eyes, a certain foreboding passing over his features. 

_ It doesn’t matter where I was born _ , he finally announced, startling you with his answer as you quirked your eyebrow to give him a questioning look. 

“If you won’t tell me where, then how am I supposed to believe that you are telling the truth?”

_ You won’t believe me regardless _ , he replied. 

“Just like I couldn’t believe the fact that you are somehow talking to me  _ inside _ my head?” you asked, giving Anakin a pointed look, not willing to drop the subject.

_ You are simple minded _ , he replied and his comment irked you more than it should have.

“If you haven’t noticed, I am  _ your _ doctor,” you started, your anger seething just below the surface. “Insult me again and - “

_ I only meant it as a way that you barely have any mental shields _ , he hastily interrupted you.  _ And that your mind can be easily accessed by the likes like me.  _

“Like  _ you _ ?” you asked, not missing the broad reference he had thrown at himself. 

He had grown quiet, perhaps realizing he had said too much. You, on the other hand, were already too piqued to drop the subject. After all, Anakin was being very talkative with you today for no apparent reason. 

“I was born and raised here, in this small town,” you started, resuming your previous conversation. “I know what you think,  _ boring _ ,” you laughed, trying to cover up your sudden uncertainness at the prospect of revealing to him even a sliver of your personal life. But would that really harm you in any way? 

“I’ve always dreamt about traveling and visiting other cities and even countries,” you trailed off, shaking your head.

_ Then why didn’t you? _

“Because I was afraid of the unknown,” you whispered. “My whole life, the only place I’ve ever known like the back of my hand was this town, these people. I didn’t want to leave all of it behind.”

_ Sometimes you have to take a leap of faith and trust your instincts _ , he replied. 

“Is that what you did?”

_ No, I never had that choice. It was already made for me, long before I realized I’ve fallen into a trap.  _

You didn’t quite know what to say to that. Somehow you had a nagging feeling that he was talking about the outcome of his life and how he ended up being here, with you, on Earth, strapped to the machines that kept him alive. 

_ It was a desert planet _ , he started and you cocked your head, his words confusing you until he elaborated more.  _ You asked where I was born and raised. Tatooine.  _

You whipped out your phone, Google searching the name of the place he just mentioned to you. And just as you suspected, the results came back nonexistent just like the first time you tried searching for Coruscant. 

_ I told you you wouldn’t believe me _ , he sounded almost accusing as he watched you file away your phone, his gaze lingering just a tad more on the device before it disappeared from his view. 

“Planet?” you repeated, just now realizing what he’d said. “As in there are multiple planets where you come from?”

_ A galaxy wide _ , he confirmed and your eyes widened.

You’ve forgotten all about the detective and the worries you felt prior to checking in on Anakin. Somehow it all ebbed away while you were by his presence, his voice lulling you into a trance. You inched yourself closer to him, setting yourself on a nearby chair by his bed.

“Tell me,” you urged, wanting to hear more of his tales, letting your own fantasies play out in your head. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been addicted to watching Lucifer on Netflix and Detective Decker just stuck with me so here she is in this story :p
> 
> Also, I've considered becoming a forensics dentist before deciding on the dental hygiene path so writing about that and doing some research on it was actually pretty neat :)
> 
> These two are having normal conversation without choking and fainting. I think it's a progress. Hope you enjoyed it ~


	11. Alien.

_What are they doing?_

“Doing an analysis, I suppose,” you answered as you hovered on the outside of the room, watching as a team of forensics performed a variety of tests on Anakin. You honestly had no clue what any of the equipment was or what their protocol was. All you were asked to do was step out while they did their job. The detective wasn’t lying, the forensics team arrived shortly after your meeting with Decker later that day. 

_Why?_

You never actually told him the reason why the police were interested in him, nor the reason why he had his ‘visitors’ as you called them. You weren’t even sure how you were going to breach that subject with him. 

“I can’t talk right now,” you whispered, aware that someone might walk by and overhear you talking out loud to no one in particular. To everyone else, it would appear as if you were talking to a thin air. 

“[Y/N]!” one of the nurses rushed down the hallway towards you. “You won’t believe this!”

You turned around to face her just as she stopped in front of you, in her hand holding what appeared to be a sealed envelope addressed from the CDC. Your eyes widened, your heart skipped a beat. 

“Is that what I think it is?” you asked, trepidation settling over you.

“Oh yes it is!” she exclaimed. “It appears your patient is a wanted celebrity around here,” she half-joked, waiving the envelope in her hands. “Doctor Omar already opened his. The CDC had taken an interest in him.”

You almost hissed. This couldn’t have happened at a worse time. First, the police and now this. You weren’t quite sure which one was worse. You took the envelope from the nurse’s hands and tore through the package, your eyes landing on the letter stating that the headquarters would be sending someone soon to investigate the case. They attached the results of their own lab work, the results matching almost identically to the pathologist’s report. There was undeniably something in Anakin’s blood that was intriguing. Something that none of the other humans possessed. Maybe the stories of him being from another planet, or perhaps even another universe, were true. But then again, who were you kidding? 

“Do you think it’s actually him?” the nurse’s voice broke through your concentration, her eyes observing the action behind the closed door through the small window. “Do you think he’s the one the police are looking for?”

“I don’t know,” you whispered, clutching the paper in your hand. 

___

_Are you going to tell me what_ that _was all about?_ Anakin’s voice was inside your head once again soon after the forensics team departed, leaving you once more alone with your patient. 

“Do you know anything about a certain component in your blood?” you asked instead, carefully observing his reaction for any clues.

He was silent, his expression carefully concealed behind scars.

_You do not possess the Force_ , he finally announced and you raised your eyebrow to give him a questioning look. 

“I'm sorry, _what_?”

_None of you, Earthlings, seem to have it_ , he continued in that same manner of his, the voice inside your head sounding almost condescending. 

You scoffed. “Earthlings? _Really_? That’s the name you came up with?”

_Would you rather I call you something else?_ his eyes shifted your way.

“Whatever,” you shook your head. “What is this ‘Force’ you speak of? And what does it have anything to do with your blood?”

_Everything_ , he answered and you refrained from rolling your eyes. He was having a rather snarky attitude with you, a drawback from earlier that morning when you were discussing planetary systems of his world. 

“Care to explain then?” you settled yourself on the seat next to his bed, waiting for his explanation. 

_It might take time,_ he started and you made sure he could see the scowl on your face. You had all the time at the moment to listen to his version of truth. After all, how else would you be able to explain the presence of the unknown substance in his blood.

_The Force,_ he finally started, his voice a steady hum inside your head. _It’s an energy field. It is created by life that connects everything in my universe, residing in all the lifeforms across the galaxy._

“And apparently we don’t have it?” you clarified.

_No, you don’t,_ he agreed. _I can’t feel anything from you nor from any other beings around me. This may explain why you think whatever you found in my blood is so fascinating to the rest of the Earthlings._

You shook your head. “That still doesn’t explain—”

_Midi-chlorians,_ he interrupted you. 

“What?” you stared at him with mild shock. 

_They are microscopic, intelligent lifeforms that form a symbiotic relationship with the host and communicate the will of the Force._

When you failed to form an answer and just stared at Anakin as though he had two heads, you heard him let out a quiet sigh inside your head, and then something unexpected happened that made you yelp out loud, as the papers you brought with you started floating around the room.

_You’ve seen me do this before,_ he continued and you couldn’t deny the truth in his words. You’ve suspected he was the one somehow responsible for the knocked over cart when you were changing his bandages earlier on in his care with another nurse. And when he was signaling for help through your device linked to his room that first night he was brought to the hospital. But seeing it so close and witnessing as papers were being shuffled in mid air was something else, your mind finally stricken with the fact that this indeed _was_ real. 

“But, _how—”_ you managed to choke out.

_There are people in my world that are born with a higher concentration of these midi-chlorians,_ he continued, oblivious to your distress. _These people are deemed to be Force-sensitive, and they are capable of sensing the Force around them and in others. And with this conscious sense comes the ability to harness it, thus allowing these individuals to access various Force powers. Telekinesis is just one of those powers._

He levitated the papers towards you and dropped them on your lap as you stared with wide eyes in front of you, your mind refusing to wrap around this new set of information.

_My midi-chlorian count is one of the highest ever recorded in galactic history._

“You do realize no one is going to believe this, right?” you finally turned your gaze towards him. “They think you’re simply a… study subject of some sorts. You can’t just spew this nonsense to them and expect them to believe that you’re an _alien_ ,” you exclaimed, resorting to that choice of wording for lack of any better explanation or who or what Anakin was. 

_You have a sample of my blood,_ he simply answered as though that was all the answer you needed to prove his point. _That’s all the proof you need._

“Oh really?” you rummaged through your folder you set to the side, seeking out the page that contained the needed information that you wanted to share with Anakin. “Then explain _this_.”

In your hands you were holding a page from the police’s report on the man they were seeking for the homicide crime, the one that made your breath hitch when you first laid your eyes on the suspect’s picture. The same one you thought looked like a spitting image of the man in your visions that you somehow shared with Anakin. 

“Who is this man?” you asked, holding the picture by his face so he could clearly see the image with his burned eyes.

You certainly didn’t miss the shocked expression crossing over his mangled face, his eyes growing a fraction too wide before he shifted his gaze on you.

_Where did you get this?_

“Answer the question,” you shook the paper in your hand. “Is this you?”

_Why do you have it?_ he continued with his own line of questioning.

“Oh for God’s sake,” you exclaimed, becoming frustrated with the man. “This is the man the police are looking for. The reason why they were performing an identity check on you. Because they believe _you_ are that man. Now answer the question. Is that _your_ picture?”

_That is not my picture,_ he hissed back. 

You were startled by his admission, your shoulders slumping as you were about to let out a sigh of relief. 

  
_I’ve no recollection of ever taking such a picture in my entire life,_ he continued and you tensed once more. _But yes, the man in that picture is me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay! I've been so preoccupied with trying to finish my other story. I do hope you're still enjoying reading this one and I promise once I'm done with the main story this will become my main focus ^^


	12. Wrong.

You stared at Anakin with unseeing eyes, your mind trying to wrap around the new piece of information you just learned from him. You didn’t even realize he was speaking to you in your own head until you felt as something nudged you at the side and only then did you register what he was doing— whatever the hell it was he was doing with the so-called Force— as he tried to grab your attention.

_Are you listening to me?_ he sounded agitated, his voice taking a higher pitch. 

That finally snapped you from your stupor as you jumped from the chair, your palms sweaty as you found his gaze boring into you.

“I... I s-should probably just go,” you stammered, your own voice sounding shaky as you fought with yourself to remain calm. 

_You know something,_ he was unrelenting. _Why are the police involved in this? Why do you have that picture? Who is that man?_

Despite knowing any better, you still answered him as you slowly backed away towards the door, keeping your gaze on him. “You already confirmed that the man in that picture is _you_.”

_That is_ **_not_** _my picture,_ he repeated his earlier words. _I only confirmed that fact that I once used to look like that before—_ he trailed off and you didn’t need for him to finish that train of thought. You understood him perfectly. He once looked like that before the tragic accident. 

Your movements were suddenly seized by what felt like invisible bonds and you let out a small shriek, realizing all too late that this was Anakin’s doing. He was using his Force on you and you could do _nothing_ against it. 

_You are not going anywhere,_ he announced and you tried to inconspicuously ring for help with the device strapped to your uniform only for Anakin to wrench that device from your grasp, flinging it across the room. You helplessly stared at the broken device, your body trembling in fear. Only to think that you were terrified of the immobile man. This indeed was a cruel joke.

_Answer my questions,_ he demanded and you could have sworn the temperature in the room dropped, something ominous passing through you. _Why are the police involved? I won’t repeat myself again._

You willed yourself to not cry as the invisible bonds dragged you closer to his bed, your feet moving on their own until you stood by his side. _Sit_ , he instructed you and you complied, collapsing on the chair as your knees buckled from under you. You still felt his presence around you but at least he let go of his hold on you and you were able to control your movements as you sat stiff and rigid in the chair.

_Talk_ , he commanded, his voice demanding utmost compliance to his requests. You briefly wondered if he ever served in the military. He certainly carried that aura of someone important, someone you should listen to and obey his orders. 

“I already told you why the police are involved,” you started, digging your fingers into the palms of your hands to keep yourself from screaming. “It’s about the case… they believe they found the man responsible for the murders…” you trailed off, drawing a shaky breath.

_What murders?_ his tone of voice was haughty. 

“Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about,” you spat and then instantly regretted it, feeling an unmistakable pressure around your throat. 

_Don’t tempt me,_ came back his response and you almost choked on a sob.

“You said you wouldn’t do that again,” you whispered, because despite everything that transpired between you and Anakin, you believed you were finally getting somewhere with him before all of this. 

_When have I ever said that?_ he taunted, glaring at you with those blood-shot eyes. The sight was truly terrifying and you couldn’t suppress a shiver going down your spine. 

“Please, let me go,” you pleaded instead.

He had the audacity to sneer! You actually saw his lips curl ever so slightly through the transparent mask of his ventilator covering half of his face and then in an instant the pressure from your throat was gone, replaced by another odd feeling of your body becoming heavy and stiff, as though something was suppressing your movements. You looked up in shock, realizing this must be one of the powers he was telling you about harnessed with the Force. 

_What murders?_ he repeated again, and this time you knew if you failed to answer him he won’t hesitate to harm you even if you pleaded with him. You could see that much from the look in his eyes.

You started shaking. “T-The man in t-that picture,” you stumbled with your words, taking shallow breaths. “K-Killed his own wife by c-choking her—” you winced when you registered the look in his eyes but continued regardless, fighting through the lump in your throat. “And t-then killed the guy he caught her cheating with by s-shooting him in the chest.”

It was eerily quiet in the room, save for the beeping sounds of medical equipment and Anakin’s labored breaths. 

“I was told his wife was seven months pregnant—” you should have kept that part to yourself because before you could finish the sentence, the room around you started shaking and you gasped, feeling like something was about to snap. You’ve never been so terrified in your entire life like you were now. 

_That is_ **_not_** _what happened,_ his voice was a hiss inside your head and you shuddered. _She betrayed my trust! She brought_ him _there to kill me._ He _did this to me!_

You couldn’t understand the word he was saying as you started crying. This was madness, all of it. 

_Stop it,_ he demanded, seeing as you were crying, which only had angered him more when his voice screamed inside your head. _I said, stop it._

“You’re scaring me,” you rasped through your tears, unable to stop your tears from freely falling down your cheeks, smudging your makeup. 

The room stopped shaking, the presence of something around you diminishing when you were finally able to move your body again. You didn’t know if you should be relieved or terrified of what it all meant. You didn’t dare to get up from the chair. And even if you could, you didn’t think your knees were going to support you. 

_Your police got the wrong man,_ he finally announced, his voice cold.

“So you deny it?” you whispered, shooting your gaze down to the file laying on the floor with the man’s picture on top of it, mocking you with the man’s charming smile. “You didn’t commit those two murders—”

_I have done far worse than that,_ he harshly interrupted you and you flinched. 

“W-What do you mean?” you couldn’t help yourself. You and your damn mouth and your unsatiated curiosity getting the best of you. This was going to be the death of you at some point.

_I have killed far more than the two murders you keep spewing on about,_ he spat, sounding almost reserved admitting that fact to you. You watched him with wide eyes.

“I... I don’t understand?” you started because you really didn’t. It was like your brain had shut off and you were functioning on an auto-pilot. 

_What is there to understand?_ he sounded angry and you pressed yourself against the back of the chair, trying to place some distance away from him. _Want me to list every single life I was responsible for taking? Perhaps reiterate the circumstances of everyone’s deaths as I slaughtered men, women and even children?_

You couldn’t stop yourself from gasping, nor muffle the sound of soft cry leaving your lips. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Maybe you misunderstood him. Maybe he was suffering from episodes of post-traumatic stress disorder. Maybe you had mistaken his admission for something other than what it truly was.

“You were a soldier, right?” you heard yourself saying, your mind whirling with possibilities of what his admission must have meant. “You were in a war… was it Iraq or Afghanistan? It makes sense why you’d think—”

_I killed them because I wanted to,_ his voice was so calm that you didn’t register the meaning until he continued. _I killed them because they deserved to die. They were like animals and I slaughtered them like animals. I hated them._

This man was _crazy_ . And you needed to get out of here. _Now_. 

_I’m not the man you think I am,_ he was staring right at you. _I’ve done far worse things than you could ever imagine._

“There you are,” the voice of another nurse was so unexpected that you almost jumped out of your skin, the spell that Anakin had over you broken as you tore your gaze away from him to find the same nurse that brought you the letter from the CDC earlier that day standing by the door. “We have some news regarding the forensics’ results. I think you should come and take a look.”

You sat motionlessly on the chair, staring at the nurse with a blank expression on your face. 

“Are you alright?” she cast a worried glance at you and then shifted it towards Anakin, her eyebrow furrowed together.

_Well then, what are you waiting for?_ Anakin’s voice was also unexpected and you flinched, immediately jumping to your feet as you hurried your way towards the nurse. You didn’t even spare him a final look. 

_I think you’ll find your questions answered once you get the report,_ you heard him say as you left the room, his voice trailing behind you even when you placed a good distance away from his room. _You’ll realize you have the wrong man._

He couldn’t be more wrong. 

You were greeted by the police, Detective Decker patiently waiting for your arrival as she quietly conversed with Dr. Omar.

“Ah, [Y/N], thank you for joining us,” Decker greeted you as you entered the office space of the head surgeon. “I’m sorry to tell you this but the results came back identical. The man you’re currently treating is our suspect of two murders, Alexander Walker—” her voice drowned out as you blankly stared at her with unseeing eyes. 

You wished you never agreed to treat that man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't realize this chapter was going to end up being so dark but I very much enjoyed typing it. Anakin is like a walking (or in this case) laying ticking bomb, ready to explode :/


	13. Abandon.

“I want to be removed from the case,” you declared when you were finally alone with Detective Decker. 

She looked up from Anakin’s or was it Alexander’s (you weren’t even sure what the truth was any more) case file to give you an overall look. “I’m afraid I can’t allow that,” she finally replied after she set the paperwork down. “Unfortunately, you’re considered to be his custodian at the time. And from a safety standpoint and your hospital policy, you are required to remain with the patient at all times while the patient is restrained with a forensic restraint—”

“I understand that,” you interrupted her and then sat down in the chair in front of the desk the detective currently occupied. “But the only reason why I’m the one assigned to be his healthcare provider is because I’m in the last year of my internship. I’m not a true doctor, _yet_ . I can’t be held responsible for helping you in this case. I barely even know this man—” that was a _lie_ but you weren’t about to tell the detective about the crazy things you’ve witnessed in the short span of the month treating this man. No one would believe you anyways. 

“We need all the help we can get from the hospital—” Decker started.

“Then by all means, I’m sure Doctor Omar can help you with that,” you interjected. “I just want to be removed from this case. I can give you all the needed information up until this point, but I’m sure you already have the access to my notes on this patient. So please,” you tried not to sound too pleading with the detective.

“Hmm,” she pursed her lips. “I would have to get a statement from you with my department before I can allow you to leave the case. And I’m sure that’s something you and Doctor Omar have to discuss between the two of you as well before we proceed with further actions.”

“I will talk with him immediately,” you raised yourself from the seat, ready to head out. 

“I didn’t get the impression that you so eagerly wanted to drop this case in our earlier meeting with one another,” Decker stopped you with her words. “Can I ask you what changed?”

You swallowed. “Nothing,” you gave her a small smile, hoping your nervousness wasn’t as visible on the outside as what you were feeling on the inside. “I just don’t want to get involved with the police. I’m sure you understand how that would look on my record.”

“No, I don’t,” she narrowed her eyes. “But I understand that you must have your own reasons.”

You nodded your head and then left the room, heading straight for Doctor Omar whom you knew would either be in the break room or in his own office, once the detective was moved to the spare room for the investigation. You tried his office first and caught him right as he was about to leave the room.

“Ah, [Y/N],” he greeted you. “All done with the detective, I presume?”

“Do you have a spare moment?” you started without any preamble. 

He frowned but indicated with his hand towards the chair while he situated himself by his desk. “What can I do for you?”

“I understand this is sudden,” you started, nervously twirling your hospital badge in your hands. “But I would like to have your permission to be reassigned to another department, or perhaps even different location.”

The look of surprise was clear on the doctor’s face as he regarded you. “I’m sorry, but what of the patient you’re currently treating?”

You tried not to wince. “I would like to be dismissed from his case and reassigned to a different patient.”

“If the memory serves me correctly, that was _your_ choice,” the doctor was still confused. “You’re in your last year of your internship. I’m afraid that would be impossible—”

“ _Please_ ,” you interjected. “I can’t— it’s complicated… I wasn’t expecting the police’s involvement and the CDC— it’s just too much—” you were stumbling over your words, hiding the true reason as to why you wanted to be reassigned. _Fear_. You did not want to be within any close vicinity to Anakin. 

“That won’t look good on your report,” the doctor’s face was stern. “As a healthcare provider you took an oath to do good and treat everyone fairly. I don’t see how slight mishaps with the law enforcement and the government should impact your capability in treating your patient just as you would treat any other human being. You’re breaking that oath, [Y/N].”

You bit your lip. “I know that. But I strongly feel I’m not a good fit. And that’s something we all have to consider as well when treating our patients.”

“I think that is a very poor choice,” Dr. Omar sighed. “But if you really think these arrangements won’t work out for you, I can look and see if there’s another department that needs an intern. All the spots are already taken—”

“I am willing to drive to a different location if needed,” you spoke up again. “Actually, I think I would prefer that over working at another department.”

“You’d be willing to drive to a city?” his eyebrows rose up. 

“Sure,” you replied with haste. “Anything. Just… as far away from here as possible,” you tried not to fidget under the doctor’s intense gaze. You knew he must be thinking something was very wrong with you, but you honestly had no choice. If you stayed here, _he_ would find you. He could talk to you across space, in your mind. You couldn’t work under these conditions, let alone function like a normal human being. In order to live your normal life, you had to get away from him. 

“I suppose that can be arranged,” Dr. Omar finally replied. “You would have to give me a few days to figure out the details. You must also fill out all the documents for the transfer and re-apply for the internship position at the other locations once I know they are available.”

“Great,” you jumped from the chair. “I will get to it right away. Thank you so much, really—” you were already leaving the office, followed by the weird look the doctor sent your way before you closed the door. 

You were already sprinting across the hospital, trying to get your belongings and everything else you needed to grab home with you to limit the amount of trips you’d be taking to the hospital so as to not chance the conversation with certain _someone_ . You were almost done packing when you heard _him_ again, almost making you jump in your spot and scream. 

_There’s another nurse here,_ he announced with a nonchalant tone as though he didn’t just admit to murdering other humans a few hours back. _Why are you not here?_

You bit your lip, hurrying your movements to try and stuff everything in the bag. Your hands were shaking, so you repeatedly kept dropping everything on the floor. You were glad no one was around to witness it, otherwise they would have given you strange looks and asked if you were alright. You definitely weren’t. 

_Where are you?_ his tone took a more demanding tone. _And why is the nurse doing your job?_

You finally finished, slinging the bag across the shoulder without even changing from your uniform. To hell with that. 

_Why are you not responding?_ he demanded. _I can hear your loud thoughts. I know you are here._

_Just a little bit longer,_ you thought, briskly walking to the front of the hospital to drop off your badge and leave. 

_Are you leaving?_ he finally asked, an onset of another painful headache creeping in like the first time when he slithered through your head. _Where are you going? Your shift is far from over,_ it terrified you to know he knew your schedule. You never talked to him about your hours, nor your job. You hardly ever talked to him unless you were in his presence. 

_Are you_ **_abandoning_ ** _me?_ he finally exclaimed, or however much the voice inside your head _could_ exclaim as you dropped off your badge to a set of curious eyes of the check-in nurse staring at you as you gave her a small smile and then hurried outside.

_How dare you,_ he seethed and you gritted your teeth. How much distance did you have to place between the two of you for you to _stop_ hearing his voice. 

“You’re a _murderer_ ,” you whispered, shaking your head as you neared the bus stop. You should have just kept your mouth shut.

_You knew who I was,_ he declared and you winced from the loudness of his voice inside your head. _I told you so myself._

“You killed your wife,” you sobbed. “You _strangled_ her. How _could_ you?”

_She_ **_betrayed_ ** _me,_ the voice inside your head roared and you stumbled in your step, drawing curious looks from the passersby on the sidewalk. _Don’t you_ **_dare_ ** _do the same!_

You saw the approaching bus so you increased your pace. Only a few more yards. You prayed to God the voice would stop tormenting you inside your own head. You could hardly see where you were going, the headache turned into a full blown migraine and hurt with each step you took away from Anakin. 

**_Stop_ ** , he commanded as you boarded the bus. _You’re going to regret it,_ he announced and you weren’t sure if that was a promise or a threat. 

  
Only when the bus had taken off and you were a few blocks away from the hospital, did the voice finally recede and you could finally breathe. There was absolutely no way you would _ever_ be coming back to that man. Not even if fate willed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the late update, life has been busy. A shorter chapter, but nonetheless the major step-stone towards progressing the story. You'll see what I mean in the following chapters. Hope you're still enjoying it ~


	14. Nightmare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was only supposed to be a few pages long but it turned into a 10-page chapter cause I got carried away and well... here we are.

You made sure to avoid hospital for the next few weeks as much as possible, only going there to pick up a few things Dr. Omar wanted you to have and drop off some of the signed paperwork that the hospital needed for your transfer. You’ve been given an opportunity at a trauma and shock center at the nearby city’s largest hospital and you were very much looking forward to it. Which meant you had to spend a few hours out of your day traveling by metro and then the bus. You didn’t mind the distance; as long as you were as far away from Anakin as possible. 

You haven’t had a headache ever since you resigned from your post, and you were quite surprised (but mostly relieved) that he hadn’t tried to contact you when you were at the hospital in those rare moments when you had to _absolutely_ be there. You were curious enough to inquire about his condition the last time you ventured near the perimeter of the hospital only to find out that his condition had deteriorated drastically. You were told he was mostly non-responsive and near a state of comatosis. 

You weren’t sure why you were feeling guilty about it but at times it was eating at you at night time when you couldn’t fall asleep, knowing that you abandoned your patient, even if that patient was a murderer and psychopath. You couldn’t help but think of your last conversation with him when he admitted that he’d killed many people just because they deserved to die. Every time you had an onset of guilt creeping close to you, you had to remind yourself that you abandoned your post to protect yourself. He could have killed you too. In fact, he already tried. You didn’t want to ever experience the ghost touch of his hands (or whatever the hell he used) to strangle your throat in his fit of rage. Just like he did to his wife. You tried to reassure yourself that it was for the best. That you had a valid excuse to drop everything and move on, as far away from Anakin as you possibly could. 

So when you went to bed after another long shift at the hospital, feeling thoroughly exhausted and mentally drained, you didn’t catch the slight prickle at the back of your head and an onset of another headache, attributing it to your exhaustion and stress as you succumbed to the much needed sleep. The blankets felt warm around your body, the quietness of the room calming your nerves, and you entered the realm of dreams, floating through the never ending blackness as your brain tried to conjure up some images for you to watch as you peacefully slept.

_Are you an angel?_

You were startled by the sound of a young voice, calling out to you from somewhere close by and when you turned you were surprised to find a young boy sitting on what appeared to be some sort of a stand, the surroundings unfamiliar to you as everything zoomed in on the scene in front of you.

_What?_ you heard yourself ask, but that wasn’t your voice and you weren’t in your own body. None of it made sense.

_An angel,_ the boy continued. _I’ve heard the deep space pilots talk about them. They live on the moons of Iego, I think. They’re the most beautiful creatures in the universe._

_You’re a funny little boy,_ you heard yourself chuckle. _How do you know so much?_

_I listen to all the traders and star pilots who come through here,_ the boy continued. _I’m a pilot, you know. And someday, I’m going to fly away from this place._

You observed the boy. Something about him seemed familiar to you. You’ve never seen this boy before, yet the way your mind conjured up the image almost seemed real to you. It was the most peculiar dream you’ve ever had. You must have missed part of the conversation because the next thing you heard yourself ask had almost made you reel on the spot. 

_You’re a slave?_

The boy’s gaze hardened, his blue eyes locking onto yours. You’ve seen that glare before. But you couldn’t place where you’ve seen it. 

_I’m a person,_ the boy declared. _And my name is Anakin._

All of the sudden you felt dread filling you in and you lurched away from the boy, only for the image to dissipate and leave you in darkness once again. You felt yourself begin to panic, like an onset of a nightmare creeping in and you could do nothing to stop it from happening. You couldn’t even wake yourself up. Were you even dreaming?

The image shifted again. This time you were in some sort of a room, its interior dark, save for the daylight coming through the main entrance leading from the outside. There were many machinery you’ve never seen before in your life, almost out of the ordinary and like in the science fiction movies you sometimes liked to watch, various symbols flashing on the screens and colors giving minimal illuminations to the workstation. 

Amidst it all stood a tall young man, his features immediately recognizable to you from the photo, albeit slightly younger and _whole_. There were no burn marks on his skin, no imperfections, and no lost limbs. His hair was shorter too, and he had a small braid hanging off one side of his head. You tried to stop yourself, tried to turn back, but your body refused to listen to you as you made yourself further inside the room, holding what appeared to be a tray with food. It was like you were replaying a memory of someone else, except you had no control over it and simply reliving the moment. 

_I brought you something,_ you heard yourself say, your voice soft and calm and unlike anything what you sounded like or what you currently were feeling like at the moment. _Are you hungry?_

The man, Anakin, remained quiet, his eyes focused downward on the task in front of him as he worked on what appeared to be another machinery with the wrench he was holding in one of his hands. 

_The shifter broke,_ he finally replied, his voice cracking slightly. _Life seems so much simpler when you’re fixing things._

You placed the tray you were holding on the ledge of another table, listening intently to his words. _I’m good at fixing things,_ he continued. _Always was. But I couldn’t._

You turned around to find his gaze on you and you froze. He didn’t have the hardness around him just yet, or the absolute misery lurking in the depths of his eyes. Just pain, guilt and sadness. He looked much younger than you initially thought. 

_Why did she have to die?_ the question had caught you off guard as you watched his face contorting in conflict. You had no idea what he was talking about. _Why couldn’t I save her? I know I could have,_ the glimmer of tears flashed before you as he struggled to hold them back and then he turned away, walking to the other side of the dark room with his back turned your way. 

You tried pinching yourself, doing anything to wake up from this nightmare. Instead, you followed him in, stepping deeper into the shadows.

_Sometimes there are things no one can fix,_ you heard yourself say. _You’re not all powerful, Ani—_

_Well I should be,_ he interrupted you with such vehemence that you almost reeled back away from him, reminding you of the man at the hospital. _Someday I will be... I will be the most powerful Jedi ever!_

Jedi… you’ve heard that term before. 

He suddenly turned your way, startling you with intensity in his eyes that it forced you to take a step back. _I promise you,_ he declared. _I will even learn to stop people from dying._

_Anakin,_ your voice finally betrayed emotion, your insides seizing with more fear as you watched Anakin’s face twisting in anger. 

_It’s all Obi-Wan’s fault,_ he screamed and you stared with wide eyes. _He’s jealous! He’s holding me back!_ he threw the wrench across the room into the far wall and you flinched, watching as Anakin once again turned his back to you, his breaths long and deep and loud in the quietness of the room. You could see his shoulder heaving through the fabric of his robes.

_What’s wrong, Ani?_ you heard yourself ask, stepping even closer to him while you fought with yourself to regain control over your movements. The last place you wanted to be at the moment was anywhere near him. 

_I—_ his voice cracked. _I killed them. I killed them all. They’re dead,_ he admitted and all you could do was watch, your heart beating wildly inside your chest.

_Every single one of them,_ he admitted, his voice shaking as he turned your way. You watched the crazed expression on his face, his eyes no longer filled with remorse but with anger. _And not just the men,_ your breaths stilled. _But the women...and the children too,_ he was moving closer to you with that same expression on his face. 

_They’re like animals,_ he gritted and you felt like crying, knowing what he was going to say next. The same thing he told you the last time you saw him. _And I slaughtered them like animals,_ his eyes continued to tear into you, burning you with his intense gaze. _I hate them!_ he yelled, and you were powerless to tear your own gaze from him. 

He slumped down in the shadows of the workstation, his back pressing against the table as you stood over him, watching as he succumbed to his own grief. You felt pity for him then, despite your revulsion and fear of knowing what he’d done. He was so _helpless_ with grief. That it forced you to kneel next to him. 

_To be angry is to be human,_ you softly whispered, only then realizing that whatever you felt for him wasn’t out of your own volition. Whoever these memories belonged to, the love they felt for Anakin outweighed the unspeakable crime he’d committed, clouding their own judgment that the man was a murderer, not seeing what you were seeing.

_I’m a Jedi,_ Anakin turned your way, holding you immobile in his gaze. _I know I’m better than this,_ no sooner had the words passed his lips that Anakin could no longer hold back, and the tears fell from his eyes, tugging at your heartstrings as you moved to embrace him, placing your hand gently to the back of his neck, moving it in soothing gestures. He was a conflicted man, a mystery to you, one you felt inclined to uncover as you moved closer to him. What happened to him to force him to do what he admitted to doing? You closed your eyes, still feeling the soft tendrils of his short hair under your fingertips, growing longer under your touch without you realizing until you could no longer hear him crying.

Instead, you felt a scorching heat on your skin and an unmistakable whiff of sulfur in the air, your lungs burning with each intake of your breath. You were no longer crouching, instead leaning into something, or rather someone, as you felt their hands holding you steady, their fingers almost digging into your sides. 

_It’s all right, you’re safe now,_ you tensed realizing whose voice this belonged to. _What are you doing here?_

You opened your eyes only to confirm your fears of where you were and who was holding you. You registered the familiar scenery of barren landscape filled with rocks and lava, red haze and fog filling your vision. But what stopped you in your tracks was Anakin. He was the same one from before but also not the same one as his younger version. This one was older, more mature, taller and broader in shoulders, with longer hair and a new scar on the side of his face. But his eyes gave it all away that something was _wrong_. He had the same look in them, the same one you’ve seen over the weeks in the eyes of the one you were treating at the hospital. 

_I was so worried about you,_ you heard yourself say, your voice panicked. _Obi-Wan told me terrible things._

Anakin frowned. _What things?_

_He said you have turned to the Dark Side… that you killed younglings,_ your voice was an octave higher as you watched his face falling, your anxiety only spiking higher that he wasn’t denying your claims. 

The look in his eyes should have scared you, already did so as you held your breath. _Obi-Wan is trying to turn you against me._

_He cares about us,_ you whispered. 

_Us?_ his face twisted, and you continued with desperation. 

_He knows… He wants to help you,_ your gaze fell down and only then did you realize that the body you were in was carrying a child, a very prominent bump was showing through your clothing that could not mask your pregnancy. You felt bile rising in your throat. These memories were of his wife. _Dead_ wife.

_Anakin, all I want is your love,_ you continued, looking up at him.

_Love won’t save you Padme. Only my new powers can do that,_ Anakin replied. 

_At what cost?_ you exclaimed. _You’re a good person Anakin, don’t do this._

_I won’t lose you the way I lost my mother,_ he fervently replied and then everything clicked in place. You realized with a sinking feeling that the last scene you saw was him talking of his mother. _I’ve become more powerful than any Jedi has ever dreamed of and I’m doing it for you. To protect_ **_you_ ** _._

_Come away with me,_ you raised your arms, placing each hand on each side of his face. _Help me raise our child. Leave everything behind while we still can._

_Don’t you see?_ he smiled but it only made you frown. _We don’t have to run away anymore. I’ve brought peace to the Republic. I’m more powerful than the Chancellor. I can overthrow him._

You slowly started to back away from him, shaking your head while he continued talking. _And together, you and I, can rule the galaxy, make things we want them to be._

_I don’t believe what I’m hearing,_ your voice was anguished, your lower lip quivering. _Obi-Wan was right. You’ve_ **_changed_ ** _._

His face twitched, his gaze growing harder. _I don’t want to hear anymore of Obi-Wan. The Jedi turned against me, don’t you turn against me!_ his voice was laced with anger and hidden threat and you saw a glimpse of his younger version when he declared killing everyone. 

_I don’t know you anymore,_ you felt tears falling down your face. _Anakin, you’re breaking my heart. You’re going down the path I can’t follow._

_Because of Obi-Wan?_ you didn’t miss the glint in his eyes, the hidden threat. He was dangerous, everything about him screamed for you to run away.

_Because of what you’ve done,_ you continued, heaving with your sobs. _What you plan to do._ _Stop. Stop now. Come back. I love you,_ you tried stepping closer but Anakin’s face suddenly twisted in fury.

**_Liar!_** he screamed, his voice laced with pain and betrayal. He was looking at something behind you and when you turned you were surprised, no, more like shocked, to find another person standing behind you in the distance. The same one you recognized in one of your shared dreams with Anakin. You felt dread pooling in, something undeniably wrong as you cried out.

_No!_ you turned around to look at Anakin and then back at the man who was approaching you with careful steps. 

Anakin started pacing, his features twisted with anger. _You’re with him,_ he yelled. _You brought him here to kill me!_

_No,_ you cried out again and then suddenly felt an all-too-familiar pressure around your neck as Anakin raised his hand and curled his fingers into a choking gesture, effectively silencing you as you fought to take a breath of air. 

_Let her go, Anakin,_ the man, Obi-Wan declared while you stared with wide eyes at Anakin, fear radiating through your body, your vision starting to swim as your brain started losing oxygen. _Let her go._

Your vision turned black and you felt yourself falling but not before someone lurched you back and you found yourself staring with wide eyes into the amber eyes of Anakin, filled with loathing, anger and hate permeating the gaze as he stared down at you. You gasped and then tried to step back, only to realize he was still holding on to you, his fingers digging into your flesh as he pulled you closer to him. 

“Do you finally understand?” his face was a sneer and all you could do was watch. “I don’t think you do,” he continued and then you were roughly spun around only to stare at the scene in front of you as though you were watching it replay like a movie, with Anakin and Obi-Wan still facing each other off, with a crumpled form of his wife laying on the ground. You wanted to scream. 

“What is this?” you finally managed to utter, your voice cracking. “How are you doing this?”

He did not reply, instead forcing you to watch the scene unfold in front of you.

_You turned her against me!_ the Anakin in front of you screamed, his face twisted beyond recognition. 

_You have done that yourself,_ Obi-Wan replied. 

_You will not take her from me!_ Anakin roared, throwing off his cloak as he started pacing around the platform. 

_Your anger and your lust for power have already done that,_ Obi-Wan replied, taking off his own cloak. 

“You’re not real,” you whispered. “This is a dream— a _nightmare_. I just need to wake up—”

“You accused me of things I hadn’t done,” Anakin beside you snapped, digging his fingers into your arm which made you wince and cry out. “I didn’t kill _him_ ,” he growled, indicating to the man in lighter robes standing in front of the other Anakin as the two started circling each other, animosity between them clear as any day. 

“If I had the power, I would have killed him,” Anakin spat next to you as you were forced to watch as the two men engaged themselves in a battle with some sorts of lasers drawn into swords as the two slashed at each other. “But he got the best of me. _He_ did this to me!”

The scene changed yet again and now you were on the lower banks of shores down below, on the edge of the lava river. You could see the two men approaching, still fighting and then shouting things at each other. You’ve seen this before. Your stomach lurched and you fought even harder trying to dislodge yourself from Anakin’s grip on you.

“Let me go,” you screamed, panic setting in the pit of your stomach. “Don’t make me watch this. _Please_.”

“ _He_ did this to me,” he repeated yet again. “He left me for dead. He _deserves_ to die.”

“ _Please_ ,” you started crying, the nightmare repeating itself over and over again. But Anakin was relentless as he made you watch as the other man had cut off Anakin’s limbs in one swift movement, as Anakin tumbled down the embankment and rolled to the stop near the edge of the lava, as Anakin tried to pull himself up with just one of his hands (which happened to be mechanical once the material of his glove was burned off) and as he kept sliding back down the black sand. 

_You were the Chosen One! It was said that you would destroy the Sith, not join them! Bring balance to the Force, not leave it in darkness!_

You were earnestly crying now, watching as the older man picked up Anakin’s fallen weapon from the ground and began to walk away. He stopped near where you were, tears streaming down his face. 

_I hate you!_ the chilling voice of Anakin’s voice carried across the air.

_You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you._

You closed your eyes, unable to watch. But you couldn’t drown out the screaming as Anakin burst into flames, being left for dead as he burned alive.

“ _Liar_ ,” Anakin hissed next to you, his voice loud even amidst the gut-wrenching screaming coming off the shore. “If he loved me, he wouldn’t have _left_ me.”

“I’m sorry,” you choked on your tears. “I’m sorry this happened to you. _I’m so sorry—”_

“This is the nightmare I have to relieve every single waking moment of my life,” he hissed and then tugged harsher on your arm as he spun your around and you found yourself staring at him with wide eyes. 

“I’m sor—”

“You _abandoned_ me,” he accused you again and you started shaking with renewed intensity. 

“I didn’t know,” you sobbed, mildly becoming aware that the screaming behind you had stopped. “If you really want, I can come back—”

“It’s too late for that,” he spat and you flinched. “You made your choice and so did my old _master_.”

“ _Please_ ,” you weren’t even sure what it was you were begging for. Your arm hurt where his fingers were digging into.

He sneered at you and once again twirled you around to watch the now charred form of himself crawling up the river bank, his form smoking and unrecognizable except to your eyes. Because that’s what he looked like when he was first brought to the hospital.

“Now you get to remember this nightmare too,” he whispered in your ear, making you shiver. 

“Anakin, please—” you started but were roughly silenced as his hand wrapped around your neck, his touch feeling much more real than what the dream was supposed to be like.

“Anakin Skywalker is long dead,” he growled. “He was a weak fool believing the lies he was fed by those he considered to be his friends and his loved ones.”

You whimpered, your vision swimming in your eyes from lack of oxygen.

“Now there’s only _Vader_ ,” he let go of you and you stumbled, losing your footing as you started falling down the rocks into the river. “You’d do well to remember that,” you heard his voice and then you were falling— _falling—_ and your scream was deaf upon ears as you shotted upright from the bed, heaving and crying as your nightgown clung to your sweaty skin, your sheets drenched from the sweat dripping down your back, making you shiver from the cool air hitting your damp skin. 

You almost didn’t hear the call, your phone vibrating on your nightstand until you managed to even out your breaths. You glanced at the clock, it was past the time for you to get up to head out into the city. You cursed, momentarily forgetting about the nightmare as you answered the call. 

“Hey, [Y/N],” it was the nurse that had taken over Anakin’s care. “Hope it’s not too early for you. But thought I’d let you know about our patient,” you almost hung up on her. Now wasn’t the best time to hear more of the man that you were now having such vivid nightmares of. 

“He succumbed to his injuries earlier this morning,” she continued and you froze. You got up from the bed, your mind reeling as you listened to her talking, not registering any of the words she was saying. The light from the outside hit your bare skin and you glanced down to see already dark bruises forming on your arm, exactly in the place where Anakin was holding you in your dream. You dropped your phone, staring at your arm.

The nightmare was _real_ . Whatever happened in your dream was _real_ . Anakin was _real_ . And now he was _dead_. 

And you couldn’t even say you were relieved. Because you weren’t. Because you still had a splitting headache as though his presence was still nearby and close to you. Because the bruises on your skin was the proof you needed that his death was only the beginning. Because his warning still rang clearly inside your head. 

Anakin Skywalker was dead.

Now there was only Vader.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story will continue on :) Don't you worry ~


	15. Darkness.

_In other news… New details were released about the homicide incident that happened a little over two months ago where a man had strangled his wife and shot a man, which happened to be his own friend, in the couple’s own house. The man, if you recall, was missing and then later identified to be a burn victim after a horrible car crash accident and was found at the nearby hospital. Alexander Walker, age 22, succumbed to his injuries a few days prior in the same hospital while the investigation into the murder was being fully conducted by the police. The police believed the intent to commit the crime was due to Walker’s wife committing adultery with their mutual friend, thus leading Alexander to resolve in ending both his wife’s life, which was at the time, seven months pregnant, and their friend, whom Walker shot in the chest. Now, there have been reports that Alexander was going through some psychiatric treatments only a few months prior to the homicide incident, leading the investigators to believe that Alexander was suffering from some form of psychiatric disorder, mainly the borderline personality disorder, authorities report. The investigation is still ongoing and unfortunately there are no clear answers given to the families of victims…_

“Hey, are you alright?”

Your attention was snapped back to the woman sitting across from you, the nurse you were working closely with during your internship at the smaller hospital before you left a few weeks prior. She had called you for a meet-up on the weekend when you were both free from your shifts, and you were now sitting outside in one of the smaller cafes on the outskirts of your town.

“I— I’m fine,” you quickly glanced down to look at your still full cup of coffee that you had barely touched since sitting down.

“Are you sure?” she pressed. “You’ve been spacing out this whole time.”

You sighed. How could you possibly explain to her what was going on with you ever since your wicked nightmare a few days prior? No one would understand. Even you could not understand. 

“I’m just,” you sighed again. “Do you think it was partially my fault?” 

“Huh? What are you talking about?”

You looked up. “Do you think me… leaving… caused his rapid decline in health?” you didn’t have to elaborate on _who_ you were referring to. She was all too aware of what happened with Anakin/Alexander. After all, she was the one who called you that early morning to notify you that he was dead. 

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she scoffed. “There was no way he could have survived his injuries. It was a miracle he lasted that long. No one could have predicted that a pneumonia infection from his ventilator would have caused his death. I mean it was a possibility… even a probability but still,” she took a sip of her coffee. 

“But he _was_ fine,” you insisted. 

“You couldn’t have known that,” she argued back. “He couldn’t even talk. I mean think about it. What kind of quality of life would he have had had he survived? He would have been jailed. Or worse…” she trailed off. 

You knew all about the CDC’s insistence on requesting more samples. The nurse had told you so. But with the criminal investigation it had to be put on hold. And then something unthinkable happened. When the blood work was drawn only a few hours after his death to _preserve_ the unidentified component, it was no longer there. Gone. You supposed it made sense. Anakin did tell you they were _lifeforms_ . So if their host was dead, then so would the lifeforms. But it still didn’t make any sense that they could not be detected in his blood sample, especially since there were so _many_ of them. It was like they were never there. And you, along with the rest of the medical team and the CDC were baffled by it.

“Hey,” the nurse’s voice drew you back to the present. “It wasn’t your fault. You did what you had to— although I’m still having a hard time understanding why you left so abruptly…”

“It’s… complicated,” you trailed off. 

“Well… I guess you aren’t coming back then?”

“No,” you shook your head. “I’m committed to the placement I’m in now. It would look ridiculous on my record if I were to suddenly switch back,” you laughed but your voice lacked any warmth. 

“I suppose,” the nurse sighed. “Although, I will admit that we all miss you. Even Dr. Omar,” she chuckled. 

“That I don’t doubt,” you smiled back.

___

You weren’t really paying attention. Or you thought you were but your mind was too hazy for you to notice that anything was wrong. You were looking at your phone, absentmindedly scrolling through the emails as you walked towards the bus station after yet another long day at the hospital. You were exhausted. This was one of your longest shifts, a twelve-hour rotation that you had to do once a week. So you really weren’t paying attention. Not until you heard someone shout and a screech of something behind you. So when you lifted your head you only had a split second to realize what had happened.

You were no longer on the sidewalk.

You had veered off to the busy road, still looking down at your phone, placing yourself between the parked vehicles on the side of the road until you stepped into the line of sight of an approaching vehicle from behind.

You didn’t even see it. You felt it as it collided against your body, sending you up in the air and then you felt an agonizing pain shot through your body.

The last thing you remembered was seeing an asphalt in your direct vision as you laid sprawled on the road with a cracked phone tossed next to you, covered in blood. Your blood. You were bleeding to death.

Then you blacked out.

___

A strange sound. A beeping noise. Someone talking. 

Everything was jumbled. Your body felt heavy. You felt like you were drowning. Like someone was pressing a ton of weights on your body and you were suffocating. You wondered if that was what death felt like. 

The noise became clearer. A woman’s voice. A measured tone of someone talking. Non-human. You tried to frown, instead you felt nothing. You couldn’t feel your body. And it scared you.

You remembered an accident. And it only made you more terrified of your outcome. You briefly wondered if you were paralyzed. But then someone had touched your hand and you felt their touch. You squeezed them back, letting them know you were there.

“Oh,” someone cried. “She’s waking up! Just look at that!”

Your head hurt. Buzzing sounds in your ears. The voice was too loud. You didn’t recognize its source.

“I would advise to remain calm,” the measured voice replied. It sounded almost robotic. You wondered why.

“How can I possibly stay calm?” the voice exclaimed. “My baby girl is finally waking up—”

You whimpered, fighting the heaviness in your eyelids to pry open your eyes. The voices hushed as you concentrated on that one task. You just had to open your eyes. Open.

“Oh my!” the voice exclaimed next to your ear and then you felt their warm hands on your face, your vision still blurred to see who was touching you. They call you their baby girl, which was ridiculous. No one had ever called you that. Not since your parents’ death a few years back. The reason why you wanted to go into the medical field. “Just look at you. You’re finally _awake_.”

Your vision cleared enough to see a woman you’ve never seen before in your line of sight. She was looking down at you with tears in her eyes. Only then did you register that you were laying down in the bed, strapped to some machines, reminding you of the hospital setting but not quite right. Something was amiss.

“Miss,” the robotic voice interrupted and when you turned your gaze your eyes widened. You would have screamed had you had the strength. Instead you just whimpered, which the creature interpreted as a sign of pain. No, not a creature. A _robot_. “The senses are on the overload. It appears the patient is stressed.”

“Well, of course she is stressed,” the woman snapped. “She’s been asleep for so long. You’re the one stressing her out.”

“I’m afraid I must distribute more sedatives,” the robot intoned and this time you let out a noise of disapproval. You wouldn’t let anyone touch you, especially not that _thing_. 

“She doesn’t need any _more_ sedatives,” the woman screeched. “Don’t you think she’s been asleep for too long already? Oh for kriffing sake, leave us be. I’m her mother, I know what’s best for her.”

You stared blankly at the woman. She was definitely _not_ your mother. This was beginning to look more like one of the soap operas you sometimes liked to watch. And you had no clue what was going on. Where you were. And who was this woman and the ridiculous looking robot that looked like it came straight out of a sci-fi movie. 

“I must disagree,” the robot intoned.

“Leave us be,” the woman snapped. “Droids, so tactful,” she rolled her eyes as the robot finally rolled away and you stared in amazement after it. It just hovered _above_ the floor. Your vision cleared enough to distinguish other rather odd looking objects in the room. This didn’t look like a hospital room. More like a futuristic set-up of a movie. 

“Do you think you’d want to sit up?” the woman’s voice snapped you back to her. You finally started feeling your body, a sort of buzzing in your veins and an odd sensation traveling through your system. You meekly nodded, glad that you could at least do that. She helped you sit up after some laborious part on her, your body still feeling weak to do anything on your own. You scanned your covered torso and legs under the sheet, everything appeared to be normal. You could even twitch your toes. You definitely were not paralyzed.

“Your father would be so delighted to hear of these news,” the woman continued. “I think even his superiors would allow him to leave his post on the flagship to come and see you. But I think it might be sooner than that! The Empire Day is coming up—” she trailed off when she noticed the look on your face. 

You opened and closed your mouth several times, trying to utter a word. Only a wheezing sound had come out of it and you tried again after the woman had given you some water, holding your hair out of the way as you slowly sipped on the liquid. 

“Feel better, dear?” she softly asked when you finished. “This must be so overwhelming for you. I can’t even begin to describe what had happened while you were asleep.”

She kept saying that. You wondered what that meant. So you tried asking again. Your question came out as a wheezing sound, garbled and broken but she understood what you were trying to ask.

“Oh, my precious,” she whispered, trailing her fingers down your cheek. “I’m so sorry this happened to you. I wish I could give you the years you’ve lost trapped in this place, but I can’t. I’m just so glad you’re finally back, with us.”

You stared blankly at her. She still did not answer your pressing question.

She sighed and then cupped your cheek with a sad expression on her face. “You’ve been in a coma for the past five years, my love.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we are finally at the point of where I've wanted to be :) It's tough writing short chapters cause all I want to do is keep writing.


	16. Error.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I was originally planning on separating this story into two parts and starting this chapter as a new story with new tags... but decided to keep it as one story all together. I suppose I will be a little more secretive with the tags as to not spoil it for anyone who is just now starting to read the story :)

“It’s probably not what you’re used to but it will only last until your father completes a transfer to a new Star Destroyer,” the woman’s voice, your supposedly _mother_ , had carried across the large expanse of the space of what she called to be your temporary _home_. A residence, or more like a penthouse was more like it, extravagantly decorated and spacious enough to be triple the size of what your apartment back home used to be like.

_Home._

You had almost forgotten what it used to be like. Everything to you was like a dream. Perhaps you’ve dreamed your life back on Earth all along, imagining it in your comatose state while you were slowly drifting away in your sleep. How else would you possibly explain what happened to you? Because no matter how many times you’ve pinched yourself, or tried to make yourself wake up, you always ended up _here_ , in this place. And you still had no idea what this place actually was. Only that it differed from Earth in every way imaginable. 

Like the flying cars that you were currently looking at through the large window of the penthouse, different lanes of traffic suspended high above in the air with no roads in between. Skyscrapers and architectures looking back at you, their designs unlike anything you’ve ever seen and nothing like what you ever imagined. This was no New York, or even Dubai, if you could go by the sparse Google pictures you had pulled up and marveled at when you were daydreaming of traveling to other places. Well, you got your wish now. 

“Honey?” the woman’s voice was next to you and you teared your gaze away from the window to look over your shoulder. “Is everything alright? You haven’t been answering me.”

You had learned her name to be Lumiya Dalle during the course of your stay at the hospital, and then shortly after when you were transferred over to the recovery ward where you had gone through both physical and mental rehabilitation post your comatose state, to which Lumiya had insisted on staying with during the past few weeks until you were finally cleared to leave and head home. She had not left your side since then and you were starting to feel trapped, an onset of anxiety creeping in as you glanced at her concerned face.

“I’m fine,” you managed to smile. That’s all you’ve been doing for the past few weeks. Trying to convince this woman, the doctors and the medical droids (you learned pretty quick _not_ to call them robots) that you were _fine_. “This is just a little… overwhelming.”

“Do you… remember anything?” Lumiya asked, her eyes filled with hope. You averted your gaze, pretending to be engrossed in looking over the large penthouse, looking at anything but the woman’s face. You felt yourself crumble under her intense gaze and her pleading eyes. But you had _nothing_ to give her. 

“I’m sorry,” you managed to whisper. You hated lying but even more so hated to pretend to be the person she thought you were. She had called you Elena, several times in fact, until you realized that that was supposed to be your _name_. Her daughter. Someone’s daughter, whose memories were wiped out and replaced by yours. You had no memory of who you were supposed to be, only of the times back on Earth, what you thought were the true memories and not just dreams. 

You had quickly learned to stop denying the identity given to you as to not alert more unnecessary probings by the droids, especially after your first episode of a nervous breakdown when you had screamed and cried and demanded for them to listen to your story, one which they quickly attributed to be vivid hallucinations as a side-effect of your coma, resulting in more injections of drugs and sedatives to keep you calm. A few more tests and scans later confirmed what they thought was the true epitome of your so-called panic attacks. _Amnesia._

“That’s alright,” corners of Lumiya’s lips frowned slightly. “Perhaps a hot shower will do you some good. Come, ZiZi can prepare one for you,” she reached for your hand, tugging you along towards what she labeled to be your own room and you grudgingly followed her behind. You couldn’t deny the need to freshen up, considering that you smelled like chemicals from the hospital. That was one thing the two worlds had in common. 

What you weren’t happy about was the way you were treated, as though you were a porcelain doll, ready to break. You were constantly supervised, even in your most private moments by what you learned to be a family’s personal droid, ZiZi, short name for its alphabetical and numerical identification number: Z-Z1. The droid had been your constant shadow for the past few weeks, a watchful eye for Lumiya when she was not around. You had grown quite tired of the pestering of the droid, even if it’s nature was programmed to imitate that of a doting parent. 

“I would rather like to do this myself,” you cut in before Lumiya had the chance to instruct the droid with her request. She sharply turned around and gave you a look which told you she disagreed with your suggestion wholeheartedly. “I know how to take a shower, _mother_ ,” you continued with an exasperated sigh. Honestly, you were starting to lose patience. 

“Are you sure—”

“I’m sure,” you interrupted her, already walking through the entrance into the fresher. “I won’t be long,” and then shut the door on her, locking her out as you breathed a sigh of relief. You were finally alone, even if it meant that Lumiya or ZiZi would be standing guard right outside the door until you were ready to come out. Which wouldn’t be any time soon. You needed the time to cope with this new reality.

For the past few weeks you had to pretend that everything was alright. That you were who everyone claimed to be. That your new identity was to be Elena Dalle, daughter of the man you had yet to meet but whom you had already heard so much about from Lumiya. Gar Dalle, the Admiral in the Imperial Starfleet, who was in the middle of the transfer to a new Star Destroyer, which you only recently learned was a war-ship, an actual _spaceship_ that apparently could travel at the speed of light. And Lumiya Dalle, who at some point was a Senator representing her home world of Andorn, but had stepped down from her duties years prior when you supposedly succumbed to your illness and fell into a coma. 

You had to pretend, while on the inside you felt like screaming each time you looked at yourself in the mirror. The reflection looking back at you did little to soothe your nerves. Because you weren’t looking at the stranger. No, what you were looking at was your _own_ image, one you’ve familiarized yourself over the years, growing from a robust child into the young woman you had become throughout the years. There was nothing you could find that didn’t belong to you. Same eyes, same hair, same cheekbones, even the slight lines around your eyes and mouth each time you smiled. Everything was the _same_. 

Nothing was ever going to be the same. 

___

“This _is_ Coruscant Medical, isn’t it?” you asked the medical droid a week later when you had come in for your weekly check up. Insistence of Lumiya, of course. Nothing you said to her could ever persuade her from changing her mind once she settled on something. You were quite in shock at the time when you first learned that you were indeed on Coruscant, the place _he_ had told you about. 

“Well, of course it is,” the droid sounded annoyed, or perhaps appalled that you would ask such a ridiculous and obvious question. 

“Right,” you breathed, fighting the sudden apprehension settling over you. “But there isn’t… _another_ one of these places, is there?” you had to make sure. 

“There is only one,” the droid confirmed. 

You hesitated with your next question. “And… do all the patients come here then? Badly injured perhaps? Missing some limbs?”

“This place is divided into sections,” the droid intoned with its monotonous voice. “Higher levels are more properly structured to accommodate severe cases in the Surgical Reconstruction Center.”

You bit your lip. “So the records are linked then? Across the whole center? Would it be possible to make my way up there—”

“There is no necessity that would require you to be up there,” the droid cut you off, finishing up with your check up as it staggered away from you. “I would advise for you to await your results in this room until they are finished,” and the droid promptly disappeared behind the sliding doors, leaving you alone in the spacious room. Exactly what you needed at the moment. Lumiya had let you be escorted by ZiZi, whom you’d left in the waiting area of the building upon your arrival. 

You wasted no time as you hurried towards the monitor and the floating apparatus that acted like a hologram, next to which lay a datapad that you had familiarized yourself with in the last few weeks while spending your time at the recovery ward, quickly accessing the information from the inner network of the whole center. It wasn’t password protected as you guessed. This datapad was used by the patients as well as the staff of the building, so all the sensitive information was still protected and inaccessible by someone like you, unless you had a code. You didn’t, but you had the access to the public network to do your search. You knew that if you were to access anything on the database at home, that it was heavily monitored by Lumiya. You couldn’t risk her suspecting anything and certainly weren’t going to attempt to do any of your scavenging using a private network.

You could hear the beating of your own heart in your ears as the blood rushed through your body when you entered the one name that had plagued your dreams and nightmares all together in the span of the weeks you spend in this world. 

_Anakin Skywalker._

You clicked the search and then held your breath, expecting to see magnitude of information on the man who claimed he was from this world. Except… there was absolutely _nothing_. The search had come up empty. You tried different variations and spellings of the name, even inputting the name he was associated with back on Earth: Alexander Walker, yet still, nothing had come up. It was like the man was non-existent. In your silent exasperation by pressing the search button every time you tried to look up any information on Anakin Skywalker, you had inadvertently caused a lockdown on the system, the datapad locking up on you and flashing an error message. You almost dropped the datapad on the floor when the droid had come back in, eyeing you with disdain (if that was even possible for the hulk of metal) as you apologetically smiled and placed the datapad face down, hoping the error message would disappear before anyone had a chance to identify the cause of the lockdown.

What you didn’t know at the time was that regardless of the network being public, it was still heavily filtered through the system, blocking any inadvertent and consequential information the government deemed was necessary to block from the public’s knowledge. And _Anakin Skywalker_ was one of the many pieces of missing information that was forbidden to be circulated through the galactic network. 

  
You didn’t yet realize the consequences of your actions when the reports of someone trying to access the information on the forbidden file was relayed directly to the person who had foreseen that any information on Anakin Skywalker was wiped out from its existence. And that this someone was going to _personally_ investigate the report, prompting for his immediate return just in time for the fifth year celebration of the rise of the Galactic Empire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to give her a name in this universe and those who read my other story know that I like name Elena *shrugs*. This person had their own life prior to the... incident and well the reader has to cope with this on her own terms. Hopefully it makes sense.


	17. Droid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to post an early chapter :)  
> Hope you enjoy this one ^^

“Oh, would you look at that? You look absolutely stunning!” Lumiya exclaimed upon seeing you in the outfit that she had picked out for you. A silver gown was adorning your body, its shimmering fabric and little jewels sparkling in the light every time you moved, casting almost a serene and mysterious appearance about you. “I wore this dress the first time I’ve met your father,” Lumiya came up to you, looking at you through the reflection in the mirror, wearing a deep blue dress that was complimenting her features. 

Today was the day of the celebration. The HoloNews have been talking non-stop about the event for the past few weeks leading up to the fifth year anniversary of the rise of the Galactic Empire. You didn’t have it in your heart to tell Lumiya that you absolutely had no interest whatsoever in this celebration, nor did you care about all the hype that apparently had been consistent in the last five years. You knew that the only reason she wanted you to come along was to show you off to the society and her “friends”, as well as potentially seeking out a reputable man to court you. You almost scoffed at that thought. If anything, this _celebration_ seemed like something that only rich people and those of high status were allowed to attend. Which meant _gossip_ and _drama_. And you were fairly certain that the only men at the celebration would be some old veterans of war, or the pesky, overly confident and snobbish young men that thought too highly of themselves. 

You were already despising this event and it hadn’t even started. 

“We should hurry,” announced Lumiya, already tugging on the transparent sleeve of your gown. “We don’t want to be late. It would certainly be frowned upon if we were to arrive later than the Emperor himself.”

You were curious enough to see this Emperor in person that you allowed Lumiya to lead you all the way to the private hangar of your suite where the shuttle was already awaiting your arrival. You tried to suppress the shiver while getting inside the elaborate floating airspeeder that would take you to the Imperial Palace. You hadn’t quite settled over your fear of trusting the flying vehicle of not dropping from the air and crashing you all to death. So you gripped the seat with a deathly grip the whole ride over until the commotion of the traffic around the Palace had caught your eye.

You’ve never seen such a grandiose structure before, not to mention the fanfare around the entrance until you were parked right in front of the exit point and then blinded by the flashes of the holo cameras of the reporters around you as you were led to the front doors of the Palace, behind which awaited the most remarkable and expensive decorations you’ve ever laid your eyes on. 

You didn’t even have time to acclimate until you were surrounded by women you’ve never met in your life but who claimed to have known you as they all congratulated Lumiya on the miracle that her daughter was finally awake. Almost an hour of consistent tugging and smiling, nodding your head at the strangers as they all told you how happy they were to see you awake and spending most of your time in the circle of Lumiya’s loud and obnoxious friends had tired you out, resulting in a massive headache. So you excused yourself, claiming you needed to use a fresher, without much of Lumiya’s approval as she ignored you being too engrossed in some sort of political conversation with one of the other Senators that you left her be and wandered to the edge of the large ballroom, disappearing past double door into the quiet and dark hallway of the building.

You breathed a sigh of relief, feeling much better now that you weren’t feeling oppressed by the aura of so many people around you. You’ve never attended such grandiose events in your life, so to be thrown into one without much preparation was quite tiresome. You weren’t planning on heading back inside any time soon, being quite certain that Lumiya wouldn’t notice your disappearance for a while until she decided to show you off to someone else. You almost rolled your eyes, remembering all the pathetic attempts on her part to introduce you to the military men, all of which were only interested in what was between your legs, leering at you with hungry eyes like you were some sort of a piece of meat. You curled your lips in disgust. 

You found a secluded spot sometime later in the sectioned off part of the hallway, a rare find that you weren’t actively looking for until you noticed an ajar glass door in what looked to be a rather impressive stained glass work, except it was a hidden door leading into the outside balcony that overlooked the side view of the Palace and the quiet gardens down below. It was already dark enough that you could barely make out the shapes of the reporters that were still lingering by the entrance to the Palace. You almost missed another craft landing some short distance away from the other side of the building until your gaze was drawn to something exiting the ship, something that was unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. You almost thought you could make out a durasteel mask covering this person’s features but it was too quick to see and the object of your interest had already stalked inside the Palace with long and quick steps, black cape billowing behind them.

You shook your head, fighting an odd sensation settling over you, some strands of hair falling around your face from the elaborate hairdo Lumiya had insisted on you wearing. You were itching to free your strands and take off this heavy and uncomfortable gown that was starting to itch, but you knew to do so was to anger Lumiya and perhaps even cause commotion that you had no desire to experience at the moment. It was quiet and peaceful up here and you lost track of time until you realized that the reporters were long gone and that the darkness had permanently settled over the Coruscant for the night. You cursed, already anticipating the worst from Lumiya as you headed back towards the ballroom. 

___

You didn’t realize you were lost until you circled the hallways for the third time in the row, stumbling over the same vase you had seen the last few times you’ve passed this exact place. You continued to silently curse, trying to retrace your steps, hoping that something like a noise of the music or a drunken laugh would give away the position of the ballroom, until finally, your prayers were answered when you crossed paths with a couple that had directed you back to the celebration while they continued on their way.

Except you didn’t turn at the corner they told you to but continued straight until you stumbled upon the familiar double doors and without any hesitation burst through them, expecting to find yourself in the middle of the ballroom where you had exited. But you didn’t. It was too dark to be the same location, and although you _were_ in the ballroom, you were at the opposite corner of it all the way in the back behind the staircase and under the columns, their positioning obstructing everyone’s views of you. You could hear the chatter and the laughter of the people around you, your eyes searching for the familiar blue fabric of Lumiya’s dress, hardly paying any attention to your surroundings until you finally registered an ominous noise off to the side. 

_Khoooh Puuuhrr._

You frowned, an unexplainable feeling settling over you as you listened to another cycle of this strange noise until you slowly turned your head, your eyes landing on the still figure standing off to the side pressed against the wall and almost blending in to the surroundings.

Your eyes widened. Staring back at you was the mask that you briefly saw when looking down from the balcony. Except now you had a much clearer view of it being so close to you, only a few steps away. You felt unnerved staring at the lifeless eye lenses of the mask, its sharp angles in the cheekbones resembling some sort of an alien insect. You then noticed the rest of the being’s choice of clothing, draped in all black and wearing some sort of suit with a blinking chest box in the middle of it, resembling one of the droids. You were almost certain you had mistaken it for being a person. It looked like a lifeless machine, emitting strange chill-bone noises as though it struggled to breathe. 

“Hello,” you started with uncertainty, drawing the mask’s gaze to you as the droid turned its head to your face still obscured by the shadows. “Would you mind helping me locate my mother?” you continued, hoping that the droid was equipped with lenses to zoom in on her face past hundreds of faces gathered in this place. 

“Excuse me?” you almost jumped, not expecting to hear the droid’s booming voice.

“Um,” you frowned. “My mother, Lumiya Dalle? She is here… somewhere. I was hoping you could use your… you know… to help me locate her,” you vaguely gestured toward the mask, feeling awkward. You lacked proper terminology of this world, learning new things every single day.

The mask stared back at you without saying anything, instead emitting more harsh sounds that were starting to grate on your nerves. When the droid failed to reply, you scowled.

“Okay then,” you looked it up and down. “Thanks for nothing,” you started to turn around only to be stopped by the droid’s baritone voice.

“You had asked _me_ to help _you_?” it asked with what sounded like indignation at your simple request, although it was hard to tell from the voice modulator. 

“Well, of course I did,” you spun back around. “I mean that’s part of your job, isn’t it? To help people?”

“ _Part of my job?_ ” it slowly repeated, planting a step closer to you, which forced you to take a step back.

“Isn’t it?” you frowned. “If that’s not what you were designed for, then what are you supposed to be?”

The droid stopped and you shivered, staring at the mask with wide eyes. Something was _not_ right. 

“Do you have _any_ idea who I am?” it finally asked with it’s harsh tone, pronouncing each word with a rasp. 

“Obviously, I don’t,” you replied, rolling your eyes, not noticing the change in the air around you. “I wouldn’t be asking if I knew, now would I?”

“ _Foolish girl,_ ” the droid hissed, raising its gloved hand in front of its body in a gesture that looked familiar to you, curling its fingers like it was holding something in its grasp. You cocked your head, trying to remember where you’ve seen it before. 

“What are you doing?” you finally asked when it stayed motionless with its hand out in front of its body. 

“ _What?_ ” you flinched again when the voice boomed, startling you enough to step away into the light, squinting your eyes from the bright light hitting them.

“There she is!” a man’s voice called out and then the next moment you were enveloped in a tight embrace by strong arms, smell of cologne and alcohol permeating your senses. “Where have you been? Your mother was worried about you!”

“Admiral Dalle,” a booming voice had startled the person holding you in their grasp and when they pulled away you noticed a middle-aged man in an Imperial uniform staring back at the figure that had emerged from the shadows with wide eyes.

“M-My Lord,” he exclaimed. “Th-this is quite a surprise to see you still here—”

“The Emperor requested my presence for the duration of the festivities,” the droid replied, its attention on the man in front of you which gave you a clear look at the being in black until the mask turned your way and you were frozen on the spot from the intensity of the gaze behind the lenses. “And who may this be?”

“Ah,” the man sputtered. “Th-this is my daughter, My Lord. Elena Dalle. She had recently woken up from a coma, please forgive her if she had upset you in any way—”

You broke your gaze away from the mask to stare at the man in front of you. Finally everything clicked in place. This man was Gar Dalle. Your supposedly father and the Admiral in the Imperial Starfleet. Now his uniform and his demeanor with you made sense. 

“Is that so?” the booming voice drew you back to its source as your eyes met the blank lenses of the mask. “Perhaps you should educate your daughter on her mannerism as to how to address the ones of importance before she ends up _dead_.”

You bristled at the comment but Gar Dalle had already beat you to it. “I apologize, My Lord. She had never seen nor heard of you until now—”

“Well then, let that be a lesson,” the masked figure snapped. “That I do not take kindly to some diminutive requests.”

“My apologies,” Gar bowed his head. “It won’t happen again.”

“See to it that it doesn’t,” the mask glared back at you before rounding on its heels and starting to head the other way.

“Yes, Lord Vader.”

You almost lost balance if it wasn’t for the Admiral holding on to you. The sound of _his_ name had brought a new set of memories of the nightmare the night of his death. You had almost forgotten about it. You were so fixated on locating the one by the name of Anakin Skywalker that you had completely forgotten what he’d told you in your dream. 

That Anakin Skywalker was long dead.

“That’s… _Vader_?” you almost wailed, forgetting where you were, earning a scared look from Gar and not noticing that Vader had stopped in his tracks upon hearing your exclamation. 

“It’s _Lord_ Vader—” Gal started with a hushed tone but you were already shaking and trying to wrench yourself from his grasp.

“It _can’t_ be real,” you were starting to hyperventilate, an onset of a panic attack steadily creeping in. “I mean he can’t… he was… it was a _dream…_ ”

The look on the Admiral’s face should have told you that you were losing it and that he thought you were having another one of your episodes, perhaps already aware of all your symptoms from Lumiya. It was one thing to guess and search for the man whom you thought might be or might not be real, but it was another reality when the man that terrified you was standing right in front of you. Literally. 

Somehow Vader was back in front of you, obstructing your vision with his broad form, dark shadow looming over you. And all you could see were the blinking lights. He was tall, impossibly so, and you recalled reading the file on his height, not understanding any of it and trying to wrap your mind around as to how he was even _standing_. The last time you saw him he was quadriplegic amputee. But you were also on Earth and he was strapped to the machines keeping him alive. 

Your eyes widened when you realized what the emitting sound was coming from his mask. It wasn’t a malfunction in the droid’s parts. It was his breathing apparatus, keeping a steady rhythm of his breathing, forcing the air through his lungs. His clothing wasn’t just for show. It was a literal walking life-support system keeping him alive.

“What did you say your name was?” Vader’s breathing ruffled your loose strands of hair as you looked up at his mask, forgetting how to breathe.

“It’s… Elena…” you barely choked out, fighting a losing battle to try and control your shivering. You were earnestly shaking in front of him.

“Is that so?” Vader hissed and then lifted his hand, tilting your chin up to his view as he brought his mask lower. You would have collapsed if he wasn’t supporting you with his hand. “You remind me of someone I used to know. Someone who looked exactly like you.”

“A coincidence, perhaps?” you quickly replied, realizing all too late that you had fallen into his trap by the increased pressure of his fingers on your skin.

“You said coma, Admiral?” Vader was not releasing you and your neck was hurting from straining to look up at him from your position.

“That’s correct, My Lord,” Gar hastily replied. “Five years to be exact. Which had left her with some… unfortunate side-effects.”

“Side-effects?”

“Amnesia, to be precise.”

“Unfortunate,” Vader had finally let go of you and you gasped a large intake of breath in your lungs. “I suppose it’s only fair to get the treatment that she needs to properly _eradicate_ the illness.”

You weren’t sure what was worse. The fact that you could still ghost of a touch on your skin from his hand or his words and their ominous meaning. 

“That has already been taken care of,” Gal replied. “Nothing to concern yourself with, My Lord. She is my responsibility.”

“Very well,” you could still feel his eyes on you through the lenses of his mask. “I do hope that won’t impede your duties as an Admiral.”

“Of course not,” Gal bowed his head. 

Vader did not reply, stalking away from you in the darkness of the hallway past the double doors, without sparing you much of a glance. You weren’t even sure what to make out of your meeting with him. Did he suspect you were who he claimed to have known? And if that was so, what was he planning to do with you? Did you trick him enough to ward off his suspicions about your identity? And what was the purpose of his questioning about your health status? 

You were confused, terrified and tired, and you finally realized how exhausting today had been that you didn’t even care as the Admiral had wrapped his arm around your back and proceeded to walk you out to the outside of the ballroom, with Lumiya’s concerned shrieking behind you as you all boarded the shuttle to take you back home. 

You couldn’t forget the chilling sound of Vader’s respirator breathing down your back. Which sounded much worse that the labored breathing of the man you were tasked of caring for back on Earth, long before you realized you were caught in the web. You were an unsuspecting moth, blindly flying around in the darkness. And he was a predator, waiting to ensnare you in his web. 

And you had fallen victim to him right from the beginning.


	18. Stun.

“I don’t understand, I thought you said that there was no need for me to be up here,“ you were currently going up the upper levels of the Coruscant Medical, riding in the turbolift with one of the assigned medical droids. 

“You have a full medical check-up scheduled today,” the droid informed you with a toneless voice, failing to answer your pressing question.

“No,” you shook your head as the doors finally opened and you were met with pristine white hallways of what was considered to be part of the Surgical Reconstruction Center, which was most commonly referred to as Empal SuRecon Center. “I’ve had my full medical check-ups down below,” you insisted but the droid was already hovering down the hallway and you had no choice but to follow. 

“This will be your room,” the droid directed you and you stopped by the end of the hallway in the secluded part of the center. You almost refused entering the room without gaining more information from the droid when the sight off to the side stopped you in your tracks. White uniforms, masks and blasters pointed at ready. _Stormtroopers_. You just recently learned about them, along with plenty of information about Darth Vader after your unfortunate meet-up with him only a week ago at the Imperial Center. You were quite honestly shocked you were not yet dead if what you gathered about Vader was anything to go by. After all, his reputation preceded him. And now, staring at the white uniform of the stormtroopers had brought out all the recollections you’ve learned within the last week about the man that had been haunting your dreams. 

“What are _they_ doing here—” you started but the droid had already nudged you inside the room with much more insistence than what was professionally obligated of it. “Hold on a minute—”

“You will stay here until further notice,” the droid informed and when you turned around you found that instead of staying in the room with you like it normally would to gather all the necessary data, it had instead locked you from the outside as it rolled away from the double doors, leaving you alone and confused in the spacious room, which looked more like a surgical room than anything else. 

You tried the door just for the sake of it, and as you guessed it, it was locked and you lacked the code nor the key card to open it. You frowned, looking around the room for any clues. This room was sterile, absent of any equipment or even datapads that usually would be laying around for you to occupy your mind while you waited for the results of your scans. Today, you felt unsettled and thoroughly confused, trying to understand the reasons why you were brought here in the first place. 

Your initial thought was that Lumiya had requested a more thorough scan after your “episode” last week, one Gar had hard time letting go as he berated you for your foolishness and lack of properness around Darth Vader, which prompted him to give you a full scope on the said man in great detail, by the end of which you knew more about Vader than you knew about the life of Elena you were supposed to impersonate. Gar did not skip even the smallest details, ensuring that you would understand your position if you were to _ever_ meet Darth Vader again. Which neither Lumiya nor Gar nor you, for your own part, ever wished to repeat that encounter _again_. 

But the more time passed in the sterile room, the more you had a nagging suspicion that something was _not_ right and that it had nothing to do with the insistence of your own parents. Your hunch proved to be correct when you heard something behind the closed doors, a muted voice of someone talking in a loud and commanding tone and the shuffling of footsteps of multiple individuals in the hallway. You couldn’t see anything through the sealed doors, but you hoped to hear at least something as you pressed yourselves against the opening, straining your hearing to hear what was being said. You failed to register a chilling air seeping in from the other side, a dark aura coating your senses until it was too late and the door hissed open before you had the chance to step back and you clumsily and with a startled voice cried out as you toppled forward, running nose first into something hard and solid.

Then you heard it. The chilling voice of the respirator right above your head and with a sinking feeling you realized just _who_ you were holding onto for balance, the lights on the chest box blinking right before your eyes. 

Darth Vader was in _your_ assigned room. 

You reeled back so fast that your vision spun and you staggered back a few steps to take in the form of the Dark Lord standing with his imposing height at the threshold of the room, his mask and those unseeing eye orbs staring right at you without saying anything except the measured cycles of his breathing filling in the chilled air of the room, your own mind going blank and shutting down on you as you stared back at Vader with wide eyes.

He was the first one to step forward, the door sliding shut behind him, making you feel trapped and helpless. Perhaps that is why you resolved to ask the stupidest thing your mind could come up with at the time, your nerves doing all the thinking for you.

“I think you are in the wrong room,” as soon as the words left your lips you realized your mistake, cringing on the inside. 

“I’m precisely where I need to be,” he snapped and you failed to suppress a shudder going down your spine. “But I see you _still_ lack the proper mannerism,” he continued, taking another step forward which made you instinctively take a step back to keep the distance. 

“I wasn’t expecting anyone to be on the other side of the door—” you started but he swiftly interrupted you.

“And I suppose eavesdropping excuses your non-existent attempts at apology?” his voice was monotonous and abrupt, yet you still detected a hint of impatience and irritability directed at you. 

“Right,” you bit your lip. There was no need to make him angry. You weren’t even sure why he was here in the first place. Perhaps just a coincidence, you tried to tell yourself. You just needed to ease the tremors in your body. “I’m sorry.”

He simply stared at you without saying anything else, at which point you started to impatiently fidget on the spot under his scrutinizing gaze. You could not read him at all. Perhaps that is why you had originally mistaken him for a droid in the first place. There was no trace of humanity within the beast. Maybe you were wrong all along. Maybe this wasn’t who you thought he was—

Your train of thought was interrupted by another swish of doors and your eyes settled on the black orb looming behind the figure of Vader, its design reminding you of something you’ve seen before but you couldn’t quite put your mind to. 

“Let us proceed,” Vader announced and you failed to notice that he was standing right in front of you, his gloved hand outstretched and reaching for you but not before you stumbled away from again, this time painfully colliding with the back of the wall. He had cornered you where he wanted you to be. 

“Proceed with _what_?” you shrieked, panic settling within the pit of your stomach. 

“With the eradication of your _illness_ ,” Vader continued as he advanced on you, the black orb following closely to him. 

“I’m _not_ sick,” you argued, watching him with wide eyes.

“That is not what the reports say about you,” he replied like it was the most nonchalant thing to talk about and not your medical records that he had accessed without your consent. 

“That is preposterous,” you exclaimed with indignation. “Who do you think you are to do something like this? That is completely off-charted and not to mention _illegal_ and if you think—”

“You have yet to realize _what_ I am,” he snapped and the black orb behind him spun before revealing several menacing appendages. 

“What is _that_?” at this point you weren’t sure which was more terrifying. The fact that you were literally pinned to the wall by Vader’s body who was towering over you, or the fact that the droid was inching closer to you, snapping its appendages that buzzed with electricity. 

“An interrogation droid,” Vader replied. “To help you _remember_.”

“I don’t understand—” you cried, your body shaking with fear. 

“Amnesia can be easily cured with the _right_ approach,” Vader’s voice wheezed next to your head and you flinched, his threat loud and clear. “And your case is especially peculiar and unique, one which requires _certain_ methods.”

You stared at him with wide eyes, the droid inching closer and closer to you, your skin prickling from the electric sparks.

“I said I was sorry,” your voice was but a whisper.

“Your apology means _nothing_ to me,” he snapped. “Your memories is all I require—”

“And my memory is perfectly _fine_ ,” you spat back, glaring at the blank lenses with fire in your eyes. 

“Is that so?” you could almost imagine him sneering behind his mask. “Then there should be nothing stopping us from proceeding,” and before you could even react his gloved hand was reaching for you, his fingers brushing against your temples. And all you could do was shrink back against the wall, your escape blocked by his body and the buzzing droid overhead, your senses consumed by his presence as you locked in on his mask. You expected some sort of pain, instead you felt nothingness, the only sensation was the pressure of his fingers against your skin. A minute had passed, and then two, and finally you frowned, casting a sideway glance towards the double doors and then back at his mask.

“What are you doing?” you finally asked, tired of the uncomfortable silence and the unnatural way you were pressing your body against the wall just to keep some space between the two of you. 

“How are you doing this?” he finally answered, his voice a loud boom in the quietness of the room. 

“Doing _what_?”

“How are you blocking me out?” he demanded, his question confusing you even more.

“Blocking you out?” you repeated. “I don’t know _what_ you’re talking about—”

“You are not Force-sensitive,” he declared and you stiffened. “Yet you somehow managed to block your thoughts from me.”

You blankly stared at him. “I don’t know what—”

“You possess none of the midi-chlorians,” he continued. “A trait you apparently had transferred with your consciousness to this world.”

“I’m sorry, _what_?”

“Do not pretend otherwise, _Earthling_ ,” he spat and you gasped, staring at him with wide eyes. You couldn’t even mask your shock, or dispute his claims, because your reaction had given you away. He had picked up on it right away because his next words confirmed what you feared the worst. “So it is true.”

You had the sudden urge to flee and you did just that, timing your escape just as he let go of your temple, creating a slight opening off to the side. And so you ducked under his arm, barely squeezing through the narrow space, grateful for the fact that you had startled him with your abrupt and quick movements that he had not stopped you immediately. You ignored the buzzing sound of the droid behind your back as you sprinted across the room, ignored the loud hammering of your heart inside your chest, feeling like it was ready to explode, ignored Vader’s angry shout and missing his attempt at stopping you with the Force, only for it _not_ to work as you reached the double doors and rushed through them, seeking out the escape in your frenzied state. 

Only to be met with the unwelcomed entourage of stormtroopers waiting by the doors, all of them immediately drawn to your attempt at escape as you sprinted down the hallway and away from them and the thundering voice of Vader as he shouted the commands. 

“Don’t shoot, only stun.”

The last thing you remembered was numbness, your mind succumbing to the dark as you collapsed on the floor, only mere feet away from the lift.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know how I feel about this chapter. I've been sick for the past few days and wrote this late at night and I feel like I've been jumping all over the place but that's where my brain had taken me. 
> 
> So Vader had known all along... on the other hand, him trying to use the Force on her also did not work in the last chapter (and he _had_ in fact been trying to choke her at that time.)
> 
> Anyways, this is like a little mini-gift to me since tomorrow is my birthday *yay*. Hope you enjoyed it ~


	19. Accusation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some language and some physical harm is present in this chapter (probably not what you think) but just wanted to warn you. With that in mind, enjoy ~

You were nauseous, dizzy and you had a splitting headache that was rendering you immobile during the duration of you slowly regaining your consciousness. Your mind was groggy while you tried recalling the last thing that had happened to you. You certainly didn’t remember being transported to another location which by the looks of it as everything slowly came to focus, looked like some sort of a blank room, its grey walls bleak and cold and sterile. 

Everything clicked into place when a distinct noise of a sliding door drew you to the source as you watched your supposedly father, Gar Dalle, walking in through the threshold into the room, behind which stood the familiar figures of the stormtroopers. You sharply inhaled as soon as you saw their blasters, their helmets turned away from you and their attention drawn to the long hallway up ahead. Your vision was soon obstructed by the figure of the Admiral as the door clicked shut and he focused his eyes on you, clear displeasure written across his face.

“You had gone too far this time, young lady,” he gravely intoned and his tone of voice and the meaning behind them had transported you back to your child years when your own father used to berate you for things you had done while you misbehaved. You certainly did _not_ appreciate his tone and you made sure he knew that by your own brashiness as you spoke out.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you started. “But _those_ men—” you motioned with your head behind the closed doors, ready to voice your displeasure before Gar cut you off.

“Do you _realize_ the gravity of the situation you are in?” Gar barked, his voice reverberating around the bare walls and making you wince from the loudness. “It is a miracle you’re still alive, which I must add can still change at any moment as we speak.”

You stared at him. “What are you talking about?”

“Don’t try and fake your innocence,” Gar spat. “Your mother and I cannot vouch for your actions now that you have committed a crime against the Empire. Do you have _any_ idea what position you’ve put me in by your brash and foolish actions?” by that point the man was yelling, his face blotchy red with anger. 

“I don’t understand,“ you started, shaking your head. “I haven’t done _anything—”_

“Does an attempt to attack an Imperial stormtrooper means _nothing_ to you?” Gar asked and you instantly tensed, your eyes going wide as you stared at the man, not believing the words that left his mouth. “You not only tried to do that but you also did that in front of Lord Vader himself! And then tried to run off, causing havoc in the Medical Center. Those actions are _despicable_ ,” he hissed. 

Your mouth automatically opened and closed several times, your mind whirling as you tried to piece everything together. “But I haven’t done any of that!” you finally cried out, standing up from the bench you were laying on, your legs shaking from both your recent unconsciousness and the shock traveling through your body, making your whole body break out in cold sweat. “ _They_ are the ones who attacked _me_!”

You were not expecting a hard slap across your face, the unexpected pain rendering you speechless. “No daughter of mine would do such a thing,” Gar’s voice was barely restrained, his eyes trained on you, hard and unyielding. “Your illness is proving to be too much to handle for both your mother and I. The doctors are wrong about your diagnosis. You do not _just_ have amnesia, but apparently also lack the mental capability to understand simple things.”

You could not believe what you were hearing. Your hand had automatically come up to the sore spot on your cheek, feeling the after effect of the slap. “You _hit_ me,” you whispered, staring at the man with tears in your eyes. “You actually hit me,” you repeated, your mind still trying to wrap around that notion that a man had raised his hand on you. 

“Your actions had cost me my position aboard Lord Vader’s personal Star Destroyer,” Gar seethed through his clenched teeth. “A position I had worked hard for the last five years that was _guaranteed_ to me until you came along and _destroyed_ everything I’ve worked for.”

You scoffed, glaring at the man in front of you. “I don’t see how either one of you actually cares about what happened to your own daughter,” you spat. “ _You_ only care about your reputation. And Lumiya, it seems her prestigious lifestyle was momentarily elevated by the gossip that her daughter has awakened from her coma. But if any of you had actually known her, you would have noticed the obvious thing. That your daughter is _gone_ ,” you were far too gone in your loathing for the man in front of you to care what your mouth was spewing at the moment, because you wanted to hurt this man just as he physically hurt you a moment ago. 

“It is a pity,” Gar had finally said after some tense minute of silence in which both of you glared at one another. “Your mother was begging me to save you. But it appears you are far too gone in your own head for us to do anything else,” he was turning to leave.

“What the hell does that even mean?” you screamed after him. “What is going to happen to me? Where the hell am I?” 

“That is up to Lord Vader to decide,” Gar gravelly intoned without sparing you another glance, deciding to ignore your odd choice of words. “After all, you’re aboard the _Devastator_. A privilege you had taken from me. I do only hope that whatever Lord Vader has in mind for you does not affect my status amidst the Imperial Starfleet nor your mother’s reputation. You have my warning, Elena. You’d wish you had died earlier,” and with that the man that claimed to be your father had left you all alone, the door swiftly closing behind him and sealing your fate to the man who called himself Vader. 

___

You were seething with rage. For the last hour, or maybe even two, or perhaps more time than you could count, you were pacing around the small perimeter of the room in which you were confined. Besides the bench in the corner and the small lavatory area off to the side, the room was bare and you soon called it for what it was. It was a _cell_ and you were a _prisoner_ , confined inside of it with the guards right outside, awaiting your fast descending doom. You tried the door, several times in fact, and each time you were left with raw marks on your skin as you clawed at the door, screaming for it to open. 

You were not naive enough to know the gravity of the situation. Somehow you were accused of things you had not done _after_ meeting with Vader and him declaring that he knew who you were. You knew it was his doing, his way of alienating you from those that knew Elena Dalle, making it impossibly hard for you to try and escape from him once again, although the first time (and what you felt was your last time) was a complete failure which resulted in the current mess you were in. You didn’t know how much time had passed, but soon your anger turned into dread and then all encompassing fear that you would die in this cold world all alone with no one truly knowing your story, except the man that held you hostage. 

You were so engrossed in your thoughts and your mind counting the steps back and forth across the cell that you failed to notice the door opening until the wheezing sound of a respirator filled your senses and you whirled your head to find the culprit of your fears. And just like that, your fear evaporated as you gazed into his mask, instead replaced with the burning anger at the being that caused you all this trouble. 

“ _You_ ,” you seethed as you stalked up to Vader, some mere steps across the small space to his large form overshadowing the exit behind him as the door clicked shut once more. “What the _fuck_ is your problem?” you didn’t care about the accuracy of this world’s linguistics nor your apparent lack of mannerism towards someone who claimed to be only second to the power and status of the Emperor. You were thoroughly fed up with weeks of living in lies and pretending to be someone you were not and you wanted to let it all out. 

“You made my life miserable on Earth and now you are a _walking_ misery in this world too?” you tried to make a point by nudging your finger into his chest, right above the box with the blinking lights that you still had no idea of their purpose only for your hand to be roughly grabbed by his own hand ( _his hand!_ ) as he roughly tugged down on it, squeezing your fingers in his hold. 

“Do _not_ touch me,” his modulated voice hissed through the mask. “That is if you value your hand.”

You ignored him, your focus drawn to hand holding your own, its intactness hidden by the thick leather gloves. It felt stiff and unnatural, the joints digging into your skin and you wondered if perhaps his hand was artificial after all and before you could stop yourself and your curiosity despite the situation, you reached for his other hand, trying to tug on the glove but not before he stopped you once more as he grabbed your other hand in his hold. 

“Did I not make myself clear?” he snapped and only then did you raise your head to stare at the bottomless pits of the mask that were supposed to be his eyes. 

“How do you even have hands?” you couldn’t stop yourself from asking before realizing your mistake if you could gauge his reaction by the change in his body as he shifted above you. 

“That is irrelevant,” Vader snapped, tightening his hold on you. “If I were you, I’d be more concerned about your life than parts of my body.”

That drew your attention as you narrowed your eyes. “This was _your_ doing,” you accused him with a glare in your eyes. “Now my father believes that—”

“ _Your_ father?” he repeated which made you pause as you stared at him before shaking your head.

“ _Elena’s_ father,” you corrected before continuing. “But the point is that now I’m accused of things I hadn’t done—”

“You tried to escape,” Vader cut you off once more. “That by itself raises the suspicious in the Empire’s eyes.”

“Then what the hell was I supposed to do?” you screamed, tired of being interrupted and before he could cut you off again you continued, fighting against his rigid grasp on your hands. “Did you honestly expect me to stay back and be interrogated by that damn droid? You were _threatening_ me. And will you let go of me for Christ’s sake?” you stomped on his foot as you tried to make your point.

He was motionless as he stared down at you, and you counted three full cycles of his breaths before you frowned. “Anakin, let go of me,” you were expecting anything from him but not the sudden animosity coming off in waves from the towering man in black. 

He roughly pushed you into the far wall, the act of which had caused you to hit your head against the durasteel panel. “Do not utter that name in my presence,” he roared and you flinched from the harshness in his voice as he stalked towards you. 

“You were the one that told me of your name,” you started, confused and petrified once more of the man. 

“That name no longer has any meaning for me,” he spat as he cornered you once more against the wall. “And you’d do well to remember that.”

“Then what—”

“You will address me as Lord Vader,” he hissed. “And you will cease any attempts at finding the information on the identity of Anakin Skywalker.”

You gaped at him with open eyes. “How did you know?”

“You were naive to think that by using the encrypted network of the Medical Center that you were safe from accessing the information you were seeking, the information I _personally_ oversaw at deleting and placing alerts across the galaxy’s network should anyone tried looking them up. You did so several times in fact, until you tipped the search into an alert mode that was reported straight to me within minutes,” you listened to him with held breath. “It took less than thirty minutes to pinpoint the exact location and even less so to locate the room in which the search was conducted and the exact time it had happened, which led me to finding out about the identity of Elena Dalle, which you had shortly presented yourself as at the Imperial Palace only a few hours later upon my arrival on Coruscant.”

You gasped. “You already knew then.”

“I suspected,” he corrected. “But your reaction had given me all the necessary information to continue my investigation.”

“By looking into my medical files,” you snapped. 

“A necessary deed,” he answered and you growled. “You were privy of my own medical files long before I had the knowledge of where I was and who you were.”

“Because I was your damn _doctor_ ,” you screamed. “And you were my _patient_. It doesn’t make it okay to just search someone’s file.”

“Then you have yet to realize what world you had traveled to,” Vader snapped back. “This isn’t Earth. This is the center of the galaxy. My master’s Empire. And you’re a simple wanderer that was thrown into my path. And if you wish to survive, you _will_ do exactly as I say.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was trying to portray Dalle's family as kind-of those families that only care about their reputation. We never actually witness Gar being emotional with his daughter, only being concerned about his own status and Lumiya, well she is kind of like an air-head so to speak? I mean she is smart and all but she is one of those high class ladies that Vader despises when they gather at the Imperial celebrations. I hope it left you with the same impression.


	20. Doctor.

You couldn’t help the stares. You knew _they_ were staring at you by the heavy weight of their gazes behind their masks, yet they were smart enough not to comment, considering who you were in company with. Or rather who you were unwillingly following, _running_ behind Vader’s heavy, long steps, as you tried to match his strides and follow him close behind in fear that you’d get lost amongst the same long corridors that looked exactly identical to the last one you’d just passed, until you were both inside the lift and the doors had closed behind to leave you once again alone with him. 

“Where are we going?” you couldn’t help but blurt out. 

He remained silent, except the hideous measured breaths that you were growing used to, filling up the small area between you two. 

“Don’t you think I ought to know—” you started and that finally caught his attention as he turned his mask towards you.

“No,” he snapped. “Be _quiet_.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Did anyone ever tell you how unpleasant you are to deal with?”

You thought you took him by surprise by your comment as he nearly whirled himself around. “ _Excuse me?_ ”

“You were somewhat tolerable back on Earth,” you started. “But now you are simply insufferable.”

He stared and you had a strange sense that he was wrestling with his emotions to not snap at you. “No,” he finally answered, which had surprised you enough that you cocked your eyebrow at him until his next words. “Usually those that betray those thoughts of me end up dead before they can finish them.”

“ _Usually_?”

He ignored your comment. “Do not speak of your planet or your world to anyone,” he said instead, his words a warning in the tone of his voice. 

You understood why he was asking you of that but you couldn’t help your curiosity, or your hopefulness as you blurted out the next words. “You found it then,” your voice was too eager. “It _does_ exist, doesn’t it. You didn’t believe me—”

“No,” he interrupted you with an impatient tone. “Your world does not exist in any of the Galaxy’s maps.”

“That can’t be,” you cried. “There’s a whole Galaxy out there that contains the Solar System. There are nine planets total, well eight if you consider the fact that NASA or whoever is responsible for naming the planets apparently downgraded Pluto from being the ninth planet,” you rolled your eyes. 

He was unimpressed by your outburst. “It does not exist in the database—”

“Then you aren’t looking in the right places,” you snapped back, becoming quite aggravated. 

“I have no patience nor will to argue with you,” it seemed you had angered him as he cornered you against the wall of the lift. “Unless you have the specific coordinates to your planet, it does not matter to me _what_ you think. There are hundreds if not thousands of the Unknown Regions well beyond the Outer Rim, and I do not care for either of them. The simple fact is that your world is off limits, even if it exists.”

You were about to argue again but by then the lift had stopped and the door had opened and you didn’t register another presence of someone else on the other side until that person spoke up.

“Ah, Vader, there you are,” it was a male’s voice and when you turned your head you saw a man in what appeared to be some sort of a military uniform. The man’s cheekbones were highly defined, creating a visual of a serious man, his light blue eyes sunken in his pale skin as his gaze swept from Vader to you, a questioning look in them. 

“I was not informed of your arrival,” Vader had straightened himself as he addressed the man. 

“I saw no need to inform you as you were unreachable at the moment,” the man replied, his gaze sweeping in your direction once more. “The Emperor had tasked me with locating you before your departure. We have a series of matters to discuss, after all.”

You had the sudden feeling that you were unwelcome, that whatever it was this man wanted to talk with Vader did not concern you even in the slightest and that he thought you were a nuisance and an inconvenience to him at this moment. 

“Shall I wait then?” the man asked, his lips thinning. “Perhaps until you escort your… _companion_ to wherever it was you were heading?”

“No need,” Vader snapped as he exited the lift. “We were just finishing,” you had the urge to point out that you did not think that you were _finished_ as he claimed to be as he signaled for one of the stormtroopers to come closer just as you exited the lift yourself, eyeing the unidentified man as he did the same. 

“You will escort Lady Dalle to her assigned quarters,” Vader gave his command and you quirked your eyebrow to give him a funny look, not used to hearing him address you so formally before. You certainly missed the look the man had given you upon hearing your name. 

“You must be the Admiral’s daughter,” the man spoke before Vader had the chance to send you away, much to his chagrin. “I have heard quite a lot about you in the recent days. Quite a pity what had happened to your father.”

You paused at the man’s words, confused. “I’m sorry, what?”

Vader made a noise. The man sneered. 

“You haven’t heard then,” the man turned to Vader. “The Admiral was _demoted_ from his position earlier today. Vader, you surprise me. It is unlike you to leave out the details of your punishments.”

“That is _enough_ , Tarkin,” Vader barked. 

Punishment? Demotion? You were thoroughly confused. You had just spoken to Admiral Dalle not a few hours ago, him declaring that he lost his promised position aboard Vader’s ship due to your actions, practically leaving you all alone to fend for yourself. If that was this man’s, Tarkin’s way of saying Gar Dalle was punished, he certainly looked gleeful and almost perverse in a way that had unsettled you. 

“My condolences,” Tarkin ignored Vader’s warning, his tone conveying none of what the word was supposed to mean. Everything clicked into place at once. 

“You _killed_ him?!” you rounded on Vader, forgetting all together about Tarkin, or the stormtrooper, or anyone in the vicinity as you screamed at Vader. “Are you _serious_ ? Are you _insane_? What the hell is your problem—” Vader had reached you in two quick steps, muffling your sounds with the back of his hand, ignoring the addled look on Tarkin’s face.

“Be _quiet_ ,” he hissed, pressing his hand against your mouth. “Or your fate shall be the same as the Admiral’s.”

You shot him a furious look, still trying to scream through your covered mouth, daring him to act on his warning to kill you too. You wouldn’t be surprised if he did, and even that thought did not scare you as much as it initially did, now that you were enraged and thrashing in his hold until you had enough of him and tried to bite his hand, only to yelp in pain as your teeth collided with something hard and unnatural, only then remembering that his hand must have been artificial and made of some sort of metal. 

He let go of you at once, perhaps astounded that you had actually tried to bite him, staring at his gloved hand in shock. It was Tarkin who broke the unnatural silence.

“I see that the rumors are true,” he started. “It is quite an unorthodox illness, isn’t it?” you had forgotten all about the pain in your mouth, your teeth throbbing from shock. 

“She is quite ill,” Vader confirmed and then motioned for the stormtrooper to whisk you away while you were still recovering from your own shock.

“Or perhaps,” Tarkin started, his voice dangerously low and sinister, before the trooper had the chance to get to you. “You allow such behavior because of _other_ circumstances.”

Vader stilled and so did you, staring at the man with wide eyes. Did he suspect something? Did he know you were from another world? Did he know you were not who you claimed to be? But how?

“Perhaps you had known each other during the Clone Wars,” Tarkin continued. “Before all this,” he motioned towards Vader’s appearance. “After all, if memory serves me correctly, there had been plenty of rumors about the man of your status and the plentiful admissions of unrequited love from your admirers.”

Your mouth almost dropped to the floor when you heard the man’s remark, forgetting all together about anything around you, or even Vader himself. You didn’t even hear him growl, or the threatening way he lifted his hand to point his gloved finger at Tarkin’s face.

“Do not insinuate something that is not there,” Vader snapped as he towered over Tarkin. 

“Your threats do little to frighten me, Vader,” Tarkin replied, unfazed by the Dark Lord standing in his line of sight. “If anything, it only confirms—”

“Nothing,” Vader spat. “It confirms _nothing_ ,” you weren’t even sure why Vader was tolerating this man’s presence. If anything taught you in the short span of being in this world is that Vader was unforgiving, impulsive, and that he would kill anyone who dared to give him the wrong look. This man was still standing, breathing and talking, and you realized with a start that he must be of enough importance for Vader to keep him alive. 

“Be as it may—” Tarkin started and you finally had enough as you snapped from your initial stupor and marched up to him.

“Oh for God’s sake,” you almost rolled your eyes, ignoring the way Vader’s hand twitched as though he was on the last verge of his sanity. “I’m his fucking _doctor_ , all right? You can now stop with your mindless guessing and get back to whatever the hell you wanted to talk with him about. And _you_ ,” you spun around to stick a finger in Vader’s chest, completely forgetting about his warning _not_ to touch him, although it seemed he had forgotten as well when he did not stop you, or he was just simply out of it completely, frazzled by your words and actions. “We are _so_ far from finishing this conversation. Mark my words,” you hissed as you narrowed your eyes at him and before either of the men had the chance to respond or stop you, you had already marched past them, heading straight down the hallway, wanting to place as much distance away from the two men.

It was only when you rounded the corner of the corridor that you heard a distinct thud of footsteps as the trooper finally gained on you. 

“Mam,” he informed you and you paused. “You’re going the wrong way.”

You supposed you were lucky Vader was not there to see you turn scarlet red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tarkin did what?! :o  
> And yes, by this point he knows, or at least 90% suspects who Vader is. Canon SW also confirms that he knew Vader's identity by 14 BBY (which is where we are now) and since he knew Anakin, he knows about a lot of things the general public had said about our favorite Jedi. 
> 
> Hope you're still enjoying this story. Thank you for all the comments and kudos <3


	21. Lightsaber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another update so soon but you all have been giving me so much love lately that I wanted to gift another chapter ^^ Thank you for all the kudos and comments and enjoy ~

You jumped when a loud noise had shaken you up from your light slumber. You didn’t even realize you dozed off waiting for Vader in one of the chairs in the room you stayed in, which the trooper presented as your quarters, until you were roughly woken up by the sound of heavy footfalls and a loud booming voice as Vader stalked up to you with quick strides.

“ _Never_ ,” he hissed. “Have I ever been so _humiliated_ in my life,” he growled as he stopped in front of you, his form towering over you.

You didn’t initially register how angry he really was. In fact, you were still trying to process what it was he was talking about. “So?”

“ _So_?” he growled as the creaking of leather reached your ears, his hands tightly curled into fists. “Do you realize the position you’ve put me in?” his voice was like a sharp knife slicing through flesh, it was loud and piercing and it hurt your ears. 

You were confused, your mind still hazy until you remembered what had happened only a few hours prior. “ _You_ !” you screamed as you jumped to your feet, the anger that you felt earlier returning full force. “How _dare_ you!”

“How dare _I_ ?” he spat, his voice only rising. “How dare _you_ ! Your behavior alone should have cost you your _life_ . You’re impertinent, insolent, and you have no business whatsoever addressing _anyone_ as you did with Tarkin without having any idea whom you speak with!”

“ _Me_?” you asked, quite appalled that he would turn this around and blame you. “You killed the Admiral! Without any sort of reason! How dare you put the blame on me?”

“I’ve killed many men,” he snarled as he pointed a gloved finger your way. “And I hardly need any reasons to do so.”

“So I heard,” you spat back, his words only angering you more. “So what was it this time? Did he breathe the wrong way? Or perhaps crossed a path in front of you?” you hardly cared if your words would only infuriate him more, you were way past your own limits to care if you were digging a bigger hole for yourself.

“You don’t know what you speak of,” he hissed back. “You hardly have any idea how the Empire runs things to try and judge me—”

“Oh, I think I know,” you sneered. “Everyone around you is mindlessly scared out of their wits to try and stand up to you. Everyone here is just to kiss your ass—” you didn’t get to finish your sentence because the next moment you felt a whirl of air as everything around you had been blown up to pieces, literally. You stared wide eyed at the destruction around you, only to realize what had caused it in the first place as Vader pinned you against the wall. 

“You’ve crossed the line,” he hissed as you felt his fingers around your throat, digging into your skin. A spike of fear had settled within you when you felt him tightening his hold on you. It was worse than feeling the ghost of his touch back on Earth. Perhaps he could feel your fear, or maybe it was your expression that had given you away, because the next moment he had pulled out something from his belt and you heard a swish of something humming and then a red blade was inches away from your face, its heat radiating in waves and almost scorching your skin.

“You know what this is,” you heard him say, your focus drawn to the laser sword, your fear turning into dread. “You know what it does,” he brought it even closer to you and you couldn’t help but flinch, trying to wrestle yourself from his hold, only to realize that you couldn’t escape this time. 

“Perhaps fear is the only way for you to learn,” he hissed and you finally snapped your attention back at his mask, staring at him with wide eyes. “You’ve forgotten who I am and what I’m capable of.”

“I haven’t… forgotten,” you spat back despite your predicament. “I know what a monster you are. It’s a pity I tried to help you,” you were expecting retaliation from him upon hearing your words, instead it seemed that your words had hurt him in some way when he flinched away from you, instantly letting go of your throat. 

You took a shaky breath now that your airway was no longer restricted as you stared at Vader, who in turn was motionless and stared back at you through the imposing eyeholes of his mask. It seemed forever when finally he moved, extinguishing the red blade with the press of a switch.

“He hit you.”

You were startled as you gaped at him. “What?”

“The Admiral,” his voice was clipped, less loud and harsh than before. “That should be of enough reason.”

You were shocked to say the least. Not because of Vader’s admittance or his justification for his actions. Not because you thought he killed the Admiral because he was somehow defending you, which by itself was a ridiculous notion. But because of the way he spoke about it, nonchalant and without any remorse, as though he was talking about the weather and not about a human life that he took because he saw it fit to do so.

“There is _never_ a reason to take someone’s life,” you shook your head. “You can’t just—”

“I can,” he interrupted you with an impatient tone. “And I will. Over and over again. Because that’s what I do. Because that’s what the Emperor expects of me. Because my position in the Empire allows me to be both the punisher and the executor, because no one else would take that role or be capable of carrying it out.”

You opened your mouth to retort to his remark but he continued. “And because keeping the Admiral alive was going to cause unnecessary problems to both of our lives if he were to realize you were not his daughter. Which had been irreversibly foiled by your _actions_ in front of Tarkin,” he finished with an irritated tone. 

You scoffed. “He clearly insinuated that I was your lover or something,” you made a face at that.

“I wasn’t talking about _that_ ,” Vader growled. “It is the way you _talk_ and the way you _act_ that had tipped him off. And the way you carry yourself around me. It wouldn’t be a surprise if he still believes you to be my _lover_ , as you put it.”

“Alright then,” you shrugged, not understanding why Vader was so fixated on that aspect. “Perhaps it’s for the best then.”

“What?” that took him by surprise.

“How else were you going to explain my presence here, aboard your ship, which clearly has no signs of any woman, unless of course, they are disguised as your troopers.”

Vader stared at you for a long moment and you thought that perhaps he had lost his ability to speak. “That is… I have _never_ … That is the most absurd thing… _No_ ,” he finally snapped after his repeated attempts to formulate a response. 

You rolled your eyes. “Then how are you going—”

“You have already done that,” he snapped. “By declaring to Tarkin that you’re my doctor.”

“You’re not serious,” you exclaimed. “You actually want me to continue—”

“You leave me no choice,” Vader was being rather impatient, you decided. “Out of all the Imperial men, you had the misfortune of meeting _him_.”

“And what’s so important about him?” you couldn’t help but ask. You were curious, at least, as to why Vader was so tolerant of the man.

“You ask me this _now_?” his voice boomed. 

You gave him a look. “Should I have asked him myself then?”

“There,” his finger was suddenly in your face. “That is the impertinence I spoke of.”

“Get that out of my face,” you snarled as you batted his hand away. 

Vader growled, dangerous vibes rolling off of him. “If you want to survive in this world, you must first learn of its dangers,” he slowly started, pronouncing each word with clarity. “It is not I you should be concerned about,” you gave him another funny look, clearly thinking the opposite. 

“Take Tarkin for example,” Vader dismissed your look. “He’s a regional governor, a Grand Moff—” you hardly had any idea what that meant but Vader continued. “And most importantly, he is the Emperor’s _favourite_ ,” he spat the last word with venom. 

“And…?” you had yet to get his point across. 

“Which means anything out of the ordinary is reported to my master, the Emperor,” Vader snapped back. “This includes you as well. There is no doubt in my mind that your _precarious_ ways had alerted him enough to want to report his findings back to the Emperor.”

“And why is that an issue again?”

“You don’t want to gain the Emperor’s attention,” Vader warned.

“And you’re telling me this _now_?” you screamed. 

“I hardly had the chance,” he snapped back.

“Right,” you hissed. “Because obviously you had the time to want to _interrogate_ me,” you rolled your eyes as you heard him growl. 

“That is beside the point—” 

“Of course it is,” you retorted back with thick sarcasm lacing your voice. “Fine. I’ll be your damn doctor—”

“It’s not that simple,” Vader hissed back.

“What else is there then?”

“You’re a woman.”

You couldn’t help yourself when you burst out laughing. “Did you _just_ realize that?”

Vader growled, the last of his patience wearing thin. “If my master is to learn of you, he’ll become suspicious enough to want to meet you in person.”

“And why is that?”

“Because besides the personal medical caretaker stationed on this ship, there are none other that are involved with my… care, except the droids,” he was hesitant to admit that it seemed.

“Your care?” you repeated as you glanced him up and down, for the first time _really_ taking in his appearance. “Does that mean your injuries…” you trailed off, for the first time realizing that perhaps he was just as badly injured as he was on Earth, or even worse. You had forgotten all about the nightmare you shared all those weeks ago before you were somehow transferred to this world, about his unfortunate _accident_ with the lava. 

“Yes,” he tersely replied. “It appears the _only_ similarity I shared with your world and that other man, besides the imagery, were the injuries.”

You softly gasped but he ignored the way you looked at him with pity in your eyes. “I am very _particular_ about my health and so is the Emperor,” Vader continued. “Adding you is only going to complicate things.”

“You could just let me go,” you blurted out.

“No,” he snapped. “You’re a danger to this world as it is to you,” you couldn’t argue with him about that. Your best bet, at this point, was to stick with him and figure out how to get back to your own world, if you even could. 

“I’ve treated you before,” you pointed out with a sigh. “It wouldn’t be any different—”

“You’re wrong,” he replied and you raised your eyebrow at him. “Perhaps it’s best for you to meet the doctor,” he started to turn away, signaling for you to follow. You stayed rooted to the spot, which gained his attention as he stopped by the door. “Well?”

“That weapon,” you nodded your head towards the cylindrical object clipped to his belt. “What is it called?”

“A lightsaber.”

“Were you really going to use it on me?” you asked barely above a whisper.

He hesitated with his answer. “I’ve killed many with this blade,” was not the answer you expected to hear from him, and then again, you were unsure what to expect from him at any given moment. You simply shook your head, sighing as you came up to him.

“Do you really think of me as a monster?” the question had taken you by surprise as you whirled your head to give him a perplexed look. You didn’t respond but you didn’t have to, the look in your eyes was all the answer he needed from you as you averted your gaze.

“Then you know my answer,” he responded as he left the room, expecting for you to follow.


	22. Chamber.

The Imperial doctor in charge of Darth Vader’s health and his personal medical caretaker was Gronhys Syko, an aged Human male with grey hair and ashen skin with wrinkles on his face and bald spot on the center of his head. He was the _only_ live being present in the whole medical department aboard the Star Destroyer and he let it know by the displeased look shot your way when Vader unceremoniously “dropped you off” without saying much of anything and stalked off God-knows-where before you had the chance to ask him questions. That left you feeling awkward standing in the midst of haphazardly thrown equipment around stations in complete silence as Syko decided to ignore your presence altogether. 

You looked around the place, your eyes roaming over some equipment you had never seen before, eyeing with disdain some of the shut-off droids in the far corner of the room as you glanced around the space. You weren’t fond of the droids and in all honesty they creeped you out. You preferred human touch, but it seemed this world specifically relied heavily on all sorts of droids, and the medical field was no exception. Which left you wondering why the need for a human doctor in the first place.

You walked around the room, trying to be inconspicuous as possible and not cause too much noise to the already aggravated doctor as you stopped in front of one of the stations that contained multiple datapads. One in particular caught your eye, words like “life-support” and “maintenance” and “malfunctions” jumped out to you as you gazed at none other than inner schematics of Darth Vader’s suit and without thinking you picked up the datapad, wanting to read more on the subject until the raspy voice of the doctor cut through.

“Put that down!” he barked and you jumped, the datapad sliding out of your hands and falling on the floor with a loud crack. Your stomach almost dropped at the look on the old man’s face as he stalked over to you with a slight limp. “Noisy brat,” he shoved you out of the way as he picked up the datapad and shut it off. 

You didn’t appreciate his tone but you were also curious enough to let it slide. “So what _exactly_ am I supposed to do?”

Syko shot you a glare but otherwise did not respond as he hobbled over to the station he was working on. You followed him.

“Ana— I mean Vader told me—”

“It’s _Lord_ Vader,” the man snapped. “ _Younglings_. Have absolutely no respect,” he shook his head.

“Right,” you cleared your throat. “ _Lord_ Vader told me I would be treating him—”

“That’s unlikely,” Syko growled as he lifted his head. “You lack any sort of _expertise_ to treat Lord Vader. Besides, you’re a _woman_.”

Vader had told you the same thing without giving you much of an explanation on the matter. You didn’t see why it was such a big deal for a woman to treat a man. Perhaps it was a cultural thing in this world? Or Vader’s personal preference? The look on your face must have registered your confusion because the doctor elaborated more on the matter.

“Lord Vader solely prefers care of the droids,” he explained with an icy tone. “He would _never_ allow _you_ to treat him, let alone be anywhere near his vicinity while he is suitless.”

“Wait,” you shook your head. “He can remove his suit? But how—”

“Do not concern yourself with matters that won’t require your attention,” the man snapped, becoming quite aggravated with you. “Your job is to _assist_ me with other matters.”

“ _Assist_?” you asked with incredulity. “But I’m perfectly capable of doing your line of work. I was a year away from finishing my internship of becoming a full licensed doctor—”

“Did you now?” Syko sneered. “You will _assist_ and nothing more. And your job will start now. Clean up this mess,” he gestured with hand toward the mess he created around the medical center. It would take you _days_ to clear everything up. You were about to argue but he was in front of you in seconds and even though he was a man of short stature, he was able to cower you against the table as he spat his next words. 

“Do what you’re told, _girl_ . Or I will report you straight to Lord Vader for your lack of obedience. He surely won’t put up with your indiscipline. Now clean up the mess and be _quiet_ about it.”

___

Rudeness must come as a sort of requirement with serving an Imperial military, be it an Admiral or a doctor. You decided that much after spending a week (or was it two, you clearly lost track of time) with the company of Doctor Syko. He was a terse man and he had less of patience with you than Vader did with you. Speaking of Vader, you hadn’t seen him at all during the duration of your stay aboard his own ship. You weren’t sure how you felt about that sort of arrangement, but relief was one of them as you minded your own business while working side by side with Doctor Syko. 

You had a relatively easy job compared to the one you had on Earth. Rarely had anyone ventured to the medical bay, but if they did, they were mostly troopers and they sought treatment of one of the droids, leaving you to tend to your own business. Syko had given you jobs that undermined your own abilities as a doctor but you had no rights to argue, especially after the first day of spending in the company of a grouchy old man. You had simple tasks, one which could have been done by one of the droids, yet the man seemed to relish sort of pleasure by making you do things you despised. Like cleaning the laboratory, or sweeping the large facility, or running his personal errands. You’d grown to dislike the man but only when he was around to bother you. 

In times when you had free time (and you had plenty of it), you did your own research. Mostly about the Core Worlds of this galaxy, seeking out for yourself the truth in Vader’s words. And so far, you came to the same conclusion that Vader told you of when you asked him. There was no mention of your planet, your world, or even your galaxy in any of the archives you managed to dig up through the Imperial network. The only hope you had, if any, that your galaxy was _uncharted_ , the term Vader used to describe the worlds that were not yet explored or simply not in any of the charted territories on the galaxy’s wide network of known hyperspace travels. The Unknown Regions. 

You were losing hope, and swiftly, and the lack of any signs that you were ever going home soon turned into desperation as you succumbed to your inner wail of pathetic depression. So was your mind deeply engrossed in your inner turmoils one day, that you didn’t even notice someone else walking inside the medical bay until Syko’s voice snapped you from your reverie upon hearing the name of the said newcomer.

“Lord Vader, right this way sir.”

You snapped your head from your station to find his dark figure standing at the entrance, his mask turned away from you as he was already heading in the direction the doctor was leading him to. You didn’t even get the chance to raise yourself to a standing position, Vader had already disappeared past the metal doors that were up to this point tightly shut and locked, and no matter how many times you’ve tried to pry the answer from the doctor’s lips about what was behind the sealed doors, he would always give you the same answer.

“None of your business.”

The doctor disappeared as well, and the doors locked shut and you were standing still for a moment, trying to absorb the initial shock at seeing Vader and him ignoring you completely as though you did not exist. You started pacing along the perimeter of the space around the sealed doors, silently fuming until the doors unlocked and Doctor Syko stepped through, his face grim and somewhat dismayed to see you standing there.

“Move along,” he snapped, as the mechanisms of the door locked behind him, not giving you a chance to glimpse what was inside. 

“What’s in there?” you asked again, not moving.

“None of your business,” he snapped again and this time you were thoroughly fed up of being told off.

“No,” you snapped back. “I want to know what’s inside. What is Vader doing there anyway?”

“It’s _Lord_ Vader,” Syko’s voice barked. “You’d do well to remember that, girl.”

“What is behind those doors?” you were relentless as you put your hands on your hips. 

“A chamber,” the doctor snapped. 

“What _sort_ of chamber?”

“A hyperbaric one,” the doctor told you with dismay in his voice. “Now _enough_ with the questions—”

“Why would you need a hyperbaric—” you stopped, your eyes widening. “ _That’s_ how Vader is able to take off his suit, isn't it?

“Enough with your pestering!” Syko barked. 

“What’s wrong with him then?” you couldn’t help but ask. “Is his suit malfunctioning? Are his lungs—”

“Nothing is wrong with him!” the doctor was on the verge of exploding with anger, his face blotchy red. “This is a simple maintenance that he undergoes each month. His suit is in need of constant repairs, and his cybernetics require frequent upkeeping—” he stopped, shut his lips and glared at you when he realized he had said too much.

“Then why aren’t _you_ there with him?” you couldn’t help your curiosity. “If you’re his _doctor—_ ”

“Have you not heard a word I said to you?” Syko snapped. “This task is only reserved for the medical droids. Now, move along,” he squeezed by you, practically shoving you out of the way while you stayed rooted to the spot, your eyes trained on the metal doors.

“If I were you,” the doctor sneered when he looked back to see you still standing by the doors. “I’d move out of the way. Lord Vader is _always_ in a dreadful mood after his _appointments_.”

___

You didn’t heed to the doctor’s warnings as you stayed close to the doors. Hours had passed by and you were starting to get impatient, almost concerned, but judging by the look on the doctor’s face, it was a normal occurrence as he barely paid you any mind, only occasionally lifting his head and shaking it in disapproving manner, mumbling something incoherent under his nose. 

When he finally looked at the chrono watch and back at you, he grimaced and then suddenly approached the exit of the medical bay, passing you by and he muttered under his breath “I warned you” and then disappeared behind the sliding doors, leaving you alone in the large room. You hadn’t even had the chance to relax or turn your head when the metal doors snapped open with a loud _swish_ , the condensed air inside the chamber ruffling your hair and taking your breath away from the strong smell of something medicinal in the air, when you heard the familiar noise of Vader’s respirator next to you.

“Why are you just standing there?” he snapped without any sort of preamble and you stumbled in your step from the unmistakable anger in his voice. 

You looked up at his towering form. “I was just waiting for you,” you told him with an apologetic tone in your voice.

He didn’t respond, instead briskly walking around you and heading straight for the sliding doors. Your confusion swiftly turned into annoyance as you ran up after him and blocked his exit with your body. 

“You have nothing else to say to me then?” you raised your head to glare at him. “After weeks of keeping me here with that grumpy old man? Do you have any idea how _unpleasant_ he is to deal with?”

“I was under the impression it was my presence you found _unpleasant_ ,” he hissed back. 

Okay, he had a fair point. You did call him unpleasant that one time in the lift. But still, Vader’s company was much better than that of old Syko. 

“That’s beside the point,” you argued back. “You _left_ me here. And didn’t even come by to check on me.”

“Doesn’t that remind you of _someone_?” he sneered back and suddenly you felt guilty, and you shifted your eyes away from him. 

You cleared your throat. “How— how did your appointment go?”

It was clearly the wrong thing to ask because suddenly you felt the air _change_ and the pricking sensation settling over your body. You looked up at Vader in alarm to see his stance change, his gloved hands balled into fists. 

“Your concern for my well-being is pointless and misplaced,” he growled as he tried to shove you out of the way but you latched on to his cape and wouldn’t let go.

“Wait!” you screamed, halting his movements. “I’m sorry— I just— I just really wanted to talk to you.”

He looked down at you and then your hand crumpling his cape and you instantly let go of him, lest incur more of his wrath. The doctor wasn’t lying when he told you that Vader would be in a foul mood. 

“Then talk,” he snapped. 

You tried not to fidget on the spot. “I was thinking—” you started, chewing on your lip, your previous idea at asking him this question seemed more reasonable than it did now. “Well, I was doing my own research about the Unknown Regions and well—”

“Spit it out,” he seemed to be in no mood for any pointless talk and it showed. “I have more important things to do than wait on you.”

“ _Fine_ ,” you growled back. “You have to fly to the edge of the Unknown Regions, right?”

“ _And_?”

“And well, I was thinking that maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to explore those regions myself,” you were blabbering, your breath hitched in your throat to try and get everything out in one go. “If I knew how to fly.”

Vader stared at you for what seemed like eternity. “You don’t know how to fly,” was his blunt response. 

“Exactly,” you exclaimed. “And everyone else seems to know how to at least pilot one of those speeders. If I could just learn—”

“No,” he cut you off with his icy response.

“Why _not_?” you almost whined back. “It would certainly make it easier for both of us if I could do the search myself—”

“No.”

“Listen,” you were starting to get aggravated with him. “All I’m asking is for you to teach me how to fly and then—”

“And my answer is still _no_ ,” his voice boomed back. 

“It doesn’t have to be you then,” you weren’t going to drop the subject that easily after thinking about your plan for the past few days. “I know there’s a flight simulator aboard this ship, it would do just as well—”

You were suddenly pinned against the wall with one of Vader’s arms, his fingers dangerously close to your throat. 

“That is the most foolish idea I have known you to come up with,” he hissed, the escaped breath from the grill on his mask ruffling your loose strands of hair. “Do not entertain yourself with such mindless ideas _ever again_.”

“They are not—”

“ _No_ ,” he snapped once more. “And my answer is final. Do not argue with me on this one,” he warned you when he saw the look on your face.

“Vader, _please_ ,” it wasn’t like you to plead but you’ve exhausted all the other means to get your point across as your fingers found the first thing you could latch yourself onto to keep him close. The hoops on his belt. “I _have_ to get back home. You have no idea—” you were rudely interrupted by the swish of the doors as Doctor Syko came into view, shock clearly written on his wrinkled face when he saw you pinned against the wall by Vader’s body, your fingers latched onto him in a desperate attempt to keep him there. Unhurt, clearly ruffled up, but still _alive_. 

Vader was the first to pull away, his movements jerky as he pried your fingers away from him in clear display of restraint on his part. 

“Vad—”

He shot you a look, you knew he did when his mask flipped your way and you felt the searing gaze of his eyes behind the lenses, silently warning you to keep quiet. You were momentarily stunned, enough for him to stalk away through the doors before you had the chance to call out after his hastily retreating back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm currently reading HP Chamber of Secrets book and thought "Chamber" was a fitting name for this chapter.  
> Thank you for all your comments and love ~


	23. Snake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another update so soon and a lengthy one at that but I felt like this chapter needed to be very detailed and descriptive. I only hope that I was accurate enough with a lot of things about Vader's suit (Wookieepedia and other sources were my references as I did my extensive research about him) so I hope you like it enough to leave a comment ~

You woke up with a start, the darkness around you bearing down and almost suffocating you, until you realized you weren’t breathing, your heart painfully hammering inside your chest. You jolted from the bed, taking a gasping breath of air, cold sweat clinging to your skin and drenching your nightgown as you tried to calm your racing heart. 

Something was  _ wrong _ .  _ Felt _ wrong. You couldn’t quite place what it was, your senses heightened as you paced around the small of the room which were your quarters. Your throat felt dry and you grimaced when you entered the small fresher, the bright lights blinding you for a moment until they adjusted and you were looking at your disheveled form staring back at you. You splashed a few drops of water on your face, rinsed your mouth and tried to comb your unruly hair until you gave up and sighed, still feeling discombobulated enough that you knew you weren’t going back to sleep any time soon.

You glanced at the chrono watch and made a face. It was past three in the morning, and the ship was quiet, almost deserted when you left your quarters in a hurry, draping a robe over your nightgown, thinking nothing of it when you arrived at the medical bay, planning on doing some of the reading that Doctor Syko was so adamant you couldn’t do in his presence. It was just as quiet here, the droids were shut off, the lights dimmed, and no presence of the grouchy old man as you made your way towards the station with the datapads. Your insides were buzzing with delight when you finally found the one you were looking for, the detailed schematics of Darth Vader’s suit, and you hurriedly unlocked the pad (you managed to figure out a password when the doctor thought you weren’t looking) as you resumed your reading from the moment you left off a few days prior. 

From the moment you started reading a few weeks back, you realized with a start and a sense of foreboding that Vader’s life support system was more complex than you ever imagined it to be, too advanced even for Earth, which made you grasp the reality of the things you never thought of. That even if that man had survived back on Earth, his life would have been miserable and full of debilitating complications, and that  _ nothing _ could have made it better with the limited amount of advanced cybernetics and other sensory machines and protective systems the Earth lacked, but was abundant and heavily researched in this world. You were just reading about the inner parts of the helmet when something startled you enough to raise your head in alarm and glance around yourself. 

You placed the datapad down, making sure to lock it in case Doctor Syko decided to also venture inside the medical bay, and then made your way around the place, searching for what caused you to be alert in the first place. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, you checked each station and even checked to see if the droids were properly stationed at their charging stations and still shut off, until you almost passed the metal doors to head back inside your quarters but stopped when something caught the corner of your eye and you looked to see something dark smeared against the locking mechanism of the chamber on the control panel adjacent to the doors.

You frowned, inched closer, swiped your fingers against the panel and then to your utter surprise and horror almost jumped out of your skin when the doors swished open with a loud hiss and you were met with another set of double doors that were separated by a small tight space, which you presumed was a decompressurized area between the hyperbaric chamber and the medical bay. You were stunned speechless, staring at the doors with wide eyes, barely believing your luck. The doors were  _ never _ open. They were  _ always _ locked. 

You stepped in, in your excitement your mind refusing to dwell on the reason why the doors were unlocked in the first place, the first set shutting off behind you and the hiss of the pressurized air rising around you until you glanced down to see a red smear on your fingers. You brought them closer to your face, looking at the shimmering liquid in the dim lights, until a metallic smell hit your senses and your eyes widened in horror when you realized what it was. 

_ Blood.  _

It was too late to turn back as the lights above the second set of doors beeped green and they too swished open with a hiss, and you were rooted to your spot when a much more stronger smell of blood hit your senses, along with some medicinal whiff of something in the air, your head feeling a little lightheaded from the pureness of oxygenated air. You almost turned back, almost backed away against the first set of doors until you heard a grunt, a clatter of something heavy hitting the floor, and unmistakable voice of Vader as he hissed something unintelligible that sounded suspiciously like another language and your legs moved on their own until your eyes laid on the sight in front of you and you gasped, drawing the attention of the Dark Lord.

“What—” he was momentarily speechless as you two stared at one another until he was the first to regain his ability to speak. “ _ What the kriffing hell are you doing here? _ ” he roared, and then stumbled in his step, almost collapsing on top of the gurney as he tried supporting his weight with the stump that was  _ supposed _ to be his right arm.

“What— what  _ happened _ ?” you were already moving towards him, your eyes taking in his damaged suit and the blood that was continuously dripping from his right side, creating a small puddle under his feet and smearing everything that he touched in red hue, including your feet.

“Stay back!” he roared and used his left hand to try and push you away with the Force, but all it did was fling some of the equipment around you, leaving you untouched as you ran up to him.

“You’re  _ bleeding _ !” you exclaimed, your eyes quickly sweeping over some of the more prominent damage on his suit but then landing right back to the large gash at his side, which upon closer inspection looked more like someone, or  _ something _ , tried to bite a huge chuck of Vader’s armor off. 

“I told you—” he started but you paid no mind to him, instead looking past him.

“Why didn’t you activate your droids?” you exclaimed, already going towards the far corner where you spotted the said droids.

“No!” he roared again and you stopped, inches away from activating the medical droid. “ _ Don’t _ .”

“You’re in clear need of medical help!” you argued, reaching forward once more until he used the Force to fling the droids away from your grasp, leaving you open mouthed and gaping at the now empty spot. “What the hell—”

“I don’t need them,” he snapped and right at that moment collapsed on the floor, his mask doing a poor job muffling the painful hiss that escaped him.

“ _ Clearly _ ,” you spat, rounding up on him and stalking towards his crumpled form. “Because you wouldn’t be sprawled on the floor, bleeding to your own death.”

“I’ve had worse,” he hissed back, trying and failing to raise himself until you crouched next to him and placed your hands on his chest, pushing him back down.

“Stay  _ still _ ,” your voice was strained. “You’re only making your wound worse by exerting yourself.”

You could feel his gaze through the lenses of his mask, his breathing ragged and laborious, his chest box also damaged in whatever had caused this type of damage in the first place. You hadn’t seen him in weeks after that time he came in for his monthly maintenance, and the whispers of troopers told you he was off the ship on a classified mission.

You looked at the wound again, the deep gashes on the side of his torso through which the deep rich color of his blood was still seeping through and frowned. “Were you  _ bitten _ ?”

Vader made a noncommittal noise, neither denying nor agreeing with your statement and you sighed. 

“If you won’t use your droids, then let me call for Doctor Syko—”

“ _ No _ ,” Vader cut you off with his brisk response. “No droids, no doctor.”

You gave him a piercing look. “ _ I’m _ a doctor.”

“In theory,” he replied and you scowled at him, reading to argue with him until he continued in a slow measured tone, his speech slightly slurred. “Help me take my mask off.”

You paused at his words, staring at him with a startled expression on your face. “I don’t— I’ve never done that sort of thing before—”

“There’s a latch beneath the back side of my helmet,” he continued as though he didn’t hear you. “Press on it  _ hard _ , and pull upwards until you hear a hiss.”

You were still staring at him for what seemed like eternity to you until he shifted and growled, snapping you back to reality and you leaned over him, doing as he instructed by locating the said latch, a mere indentation below the arch of the helmet and pulled hard, and finally after the strain of tugging on it, you heard the hiss as compressurized air inside the suit released, the magnetic clamps disconnecting and making it easier for you to lift the helmet over his head and set it aside, before you laid your eyes back on him.

“Now the mask,” he directed and you reached forward, unsure in your movements, as you grasped the outer edges of the mask that seemed to encompass half of his head and then pulled down and over the seal that attached the mask to his collar, disconnecting the durasteel piece of metal from the interface until you were staring at the mangled and deathly pale face of Darth Vader. The scars were still there, deeply gnawed into his skin, but the last time you’ve seen him they still looked raw and peeling, his skin still resembling some sort of color of his natural skin tone.

He audibly sighed, breathing in a large intake of highly oxygenated air without the help of the ventilator and then his eyes found yours and you stifled a gasp, his icy gaze piercing your own and suddenly you felt the need to look away, embarrassed at getting caught for staring.

“The collar,” he wheezed, his natural voice mixed with the vocoder and you complied, peeling the last vestige of the upper portion of his armor away, careful in your movements as to not disturb the power distributors or the air exhausts, until his neck was freed and he closed his eyes, his bald head leaning against the gurney’s legs. 

You stared, unable to look away. “Anakin,” you whispered, half afraid that he would die and half-mesmerized to see him breathing on his own in his hyperbaric chamber. 

His eyes snapped open and he glared at you with a vicious look in his blood-shot amber eyes, until you realized your mistake at calling him by his old name. “I’m sorry—”

“There is— a bacta tank— turn it on,” he wheezed and you looked to the center of the chamber to see a large cylindrical object, the tank, and you once again complied with his request as you left his side to turn it on, watching as it started to fill up with a liquid substance— a bacta, a fluid that could accelerate healing and treat major injuries. You’ve read about it in your reports but you’ve never seen one until now.

You heard a noise behind you and when you turned you found that Vader once again tried to lift himself up from the floor, this time succeeding as he stood unsteadily on his feet. 

“Vader,” you chided him as you hurried over to his side. “Please don’t—”

He was already unclasping his cape with his intact left hand, barely able to stay on his feet, his movement jerky and unbalanced and you caught his hand in your own, stopping his attempts at trying to undress himself.

“Let me help you,” you pleaded with him and he grunted. “Just tell me what to do.”

He seemed to consider your request for a moment. “The shoulder— guards,” you nodded your head, understanding him as you tried to lift the armor off his shoulders and almost hissed at the weight of them.

“ _ Jesus Christ _ ,” you didn’t mean to say it out loud. “These things weigh a ton,” you weren’t exaggerating at how heavy they were, and considering how tall Vader was and your position, their removal was awkward to say the least.

“You know that droids can do all this in less time?” you couldn’t help but ask as you continued removing his chest armor.

“I  _ know _ ,” he rasped, his voice barely above a whisper, his vocal cords strained and scorched in the fires of Mustafar. 

“Then why won’t you let them treat you?” you couldn’t understand that part. You didn’t like the droids but in this situation it seemed the most logical thing to do was to use them. And Syko did tell you Vader  _ only _ allowed his droids to do what you were currently doing. 

“ _ Because _ ,” Vader hissed and you looked up at his face in alarm to hear him wheezing and taking strenuous breaths. “My master— cannot learn— of my  _ failure _ .”

You disregarded his odd comment, instead focusing on the more pressing matters. “How long can you breathe on your own?”

“Not— long,” he conceded and you swore.

“Then why didn’t you say anything?” you were unclasping his belt with the push of a middle metal box that acted as an electromagnetic clasp, carefully laying it on the floor, fully aware that his belt contained several of the important controls that regulated his suit. You laid his blood-covered lightsaber on the gurney, your focus now drawn to the tabard that span from his shoulders all the way down to the floor, and you slid that too, now reaching for the clasps that held his chest control box, unclasping them around his back and in process also removing the small flat backpack that was usually hidden by his long flowing cape. You didn’t realize Vader was watching you with an odd look on his face until he spoke. 

“You know— what you are— doing,” it wasn’t a question. It was a statement, one he deduced as he watched you undressing him without him supplying any sort of commentary. You paused, your gaze flickering up to his face and then back down as you started tugging off his padded glove which also contained magnetic clasps that snapped to his prosthesis tubing. 

“Yes,” you tersely replied. “I did some research on your suit.”

You willed yourself to tear your gaze away from his cybernetic hand, its appendages skeleton-like and bare, reminding you of the pain they caused when you bit his hand when he tried to muffle your protests in front of Tarkin. You shuddered, thinking the luck was on your side that you didn’t crack any of your teeth on the sturdy metal. 

You were just reaching for his codpiece when he made a noise and you looked up to see a frown creasing in between what should have been his eyebrows. 

“Am I hurting you?”

“No—” his voice was stiff, almost strangled. 

“Okay,” you continued unclasping his codpiece, completely missing the look he sent you as you crouched in front of him, and then set the sturdy material aside. “Sit down,” you told him, gesturing with your head towards the gurney. 

He did as you told him, practically collapsing on the metal surface, his breathing growing more ragged by the minute. You wasted no time taking off his combat boots with the durasteel shin armor that covered them, and once again you marveled at the heaviness of different parts of his suit, mildly fascinated at seeing his leg cybernetics looking exactly the same as his arm, uncovered and skeletal-like. 

“I don’t know how you do it,” you couldn’t help but voice your opinion when you raised yourself to your full height. “This suit must be so uncomfortable—” you caught yourself, your eyes growing wide at your audacious remark. 

“You think— I have a  _ choice _ ?” his scarred lips turned into sneer as he glared at you with simmering anger in his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” you started, biting your lip. “My comment was uncalled for,” you were just reaching for the seam of the ribbed, padded, multi-ply body glove that covered everything below his neck when he stopped you with his left hand, his metal digits digging into your skin.

“I can— handle it— from here,” he wheezed and you gave him a rather unimpressed look, cocking your eyebrow before you shrugged his hand and resumed what you were doing as you tugged on the leather suit. “I told you—”

“You can barely stand,” you interrupted him, pulling the material off his shoulders, being very careful around the wires and controls sticking out from his chest where the chest unit was normally attached, and then equally careful when you started peeling the shredded material off his right side, the material stuck to his torso from all the blood trickling out of the wounds. You gasped, at loss for words, when your eyes finally landed on the damage his body incurred. 

“What—  _ happened _ ?” you asked again, because you weren’t sure what could possibly best Vader, tearing off half of his arm and leaving deep gashes into his body to the point where you thought you could make out muscles and even rib bones poking through the deep wounds. The pain must have been excruciating.

“A snake,” he replied and you found yourself gaping at him.

“A  _ snake _ ?” you repeated, having a hard time digesting the information.

“Yes,” he snapped. “A  _ snake _ . Does your world— not have one?”

“We do,” you shook your head, still staring at the gashes. “Just not  _ that _ size.”

Vader scoffed. “The Heinsnake Cult— can be—  _ unpredictable _ ,” he supplied as his explanation, leaving you with more questions than answers. 

“Is that where you were?” you softly asked, tugging his suit past his left arm and the stump of his right one, the wires haphazardly sticking out of what was left of his prosthetic. 

He grunted, his way of answering your question and you continued, the curiosity getting the better of you. “So… what happened to the snake?”

“Dead,” Vader hissed.

“And the Cult?”

“ _ Dead _ .”

You raised your head. “All of them?”

The muscles on his neck were strained. “ _ All of them _ ,” he confirmed and the two of you stared at one another until you broke your eye contact and started tugging the suit off his hips.

“Wait—” his voice was strained once more.

“What’s the matter—” you raised your head to find a strange look on his face, his eyes glazed with something. He seemed to be having a hard time voicing whatever it was that was concerning him, and you could have sworn you saw a pink hue coloring his pale cheeks. You realized the reason for his discomfort a second later, and you composed your face, your eyes trained on his face.

“There is nothing to be embarrassed about,” you told him, trying to convey comfort through your soft voice. “I’ve seen your body before, Anakin. This is nothing new.”

“Not— like this,” he hissed, in his embarrassment disregarding even a slip of his old name from your lips.

“Would you rather I activate the droids—”

“ _ No _ ,” his voice was harsh and he wheezed, and it took a few seconds for him to compose himself, trying to regain his breathing. “I have— a catheter—” he stopped himself and then grimaced, looking away from you as he clenched his left hand into fist, the motors softly whirling in the silence of the room.

“Okay,” you slowly nodded your head, careful in your movements to tug the suit past his hips, past the charred remnants of his crotch, past the tubing of his catheter, the line of which was attached to the collection pouch which was housed in his backpack, which you previously removed, and then the rest of the suit was off and you stared at the stumps of his lower limbs, the gnarly flesh attached to the cybernetic legs, one past his knee and one below, the sight of which made you wonder if Vader was even comfortable enough with walking.

You cleared your throat. “What— what should I do now?”

“Help me— get to the— bacta tank,” his voice was becoming even less breathy and you hurried, coming to his left side to help him lean on you as you slowly made your way to the tank, his weight heavily supported on you that it made you grit your teeth.

“The— supports,” he was indicating towards the arm straps that were hanging above the tank, and you used the controls to bring them down, strapping them around Vader’s upper body. “The limbs—”

You had to take those off too and wrap his stumps with the special metal coverings that had hoses attached to them, perhaps allowing the computer to relay muscle impulses between his brain and his limbs without relying on the servomotors equipped in his cybernetics. You weren’t going to worry too much about his mangled right arm, nor what to do with the rest of his heavy limbs once you managed to take them off under his precise instructions, laying them carefully on the table next to the tank. 

The last thing you had to do was to detach his catheter and snap a sort of waterproof briefs around his lower torso with blinking lights around it, acting as a waste eliminator. And then all you had left was the breathing mask and the control panel of his chest, which would regulate his breathing and other forms of bodily functions while he was submerged in the bacta fluid. 

“Are you sure I did everything right?” you asked with worry in your voice as you clipped the chest panel back to the wires and control sticking out of his chest, the machine whirling and hissing as it activated.

“Yes,” he whispered, the mask hovering next to his face. Once you put it over his face, he wouldn’t be able to communicate with you.

“How will I know you’ll be alright?”

“I— will be,” he assured you. “I will— activate the droids— once the time comes— with the Force,” he was wheezing earnestly now and you didn’t want to delay the comfort of the mask as you placed it over his nose, strapping it over his ears and making sure it was tight enough and was sealed around his face. It was an immediate relief for him as the oxygen worked through his system, the machine taking over his function of breathing on his own.

You couldn’t help but touch his face, stroking your thumb over the pronounced gash on his left cheek before you withdrew your hand and pressed the control switch to submerge him into the bacta solution, all the while watching him with held breath until he was inside and sealed within the tank. You stayed long enough to make sure everything was running smoothly, that the oxygen was being supplied to him in proper forms, that the control system was working with no hitches. You didn’t want to leave him be, but knew that at any sign of malfunction he would turn on the droids like he promised you. 

You touched the glass with the palm of your hand and found his eyes watching you, the amber in the receding and turning blue. You briefly smiled at him, your gaze sweeping over the gashes on his side to find that the blood was already clotting and that you knew he was going to be alright.

“Get well soon,” you whispered, and then turned around and headed for the doors, your robe, your hands and your feet stained with blood, but you hardly cared or paid any attention to it, your mind solely on Vader and the discoveries you learned of the man this night.

  
You certainly missed the longing look in Vader’s eyes as he watched you leave, nor the way the controls picked up on his rapid heartbeat when you finally disappeared, nor the tightness in his chest which had  _ nothing _ to do with his damaged lungs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Heinsnake Cult did happen in legends. Vader was sent by Palpatine to exterminate them because the Cult tried to make an assassination attempt on Palpatine thus resulting in Vader killing them all. The snake part was added for this part as a big monster that guarded the entrance to the Temple :)


	24. Beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for all your comments and kudos <3 They mean so much to me! And I'm sorry if I didn't get back to all of you in the previous chapter, it takes me just as much time to answer them all as to type the story but I read them all and cherish them all just the same :)
> 
> With that in mind, I wanted to gift you another chapter so soon, one I had a lot of fun typing up :) A lot of terminology and ship schematics were actually taken from _Millennium Falcon_ diagram but I figured most of that were true for other ships.
> 
> Have fun, stay safe and Happy Thanksgiving to you all in America :3  
> I'm off to hammer myself with turkey and stuffed ham all day tomorrow ~

You weren’t expected to be roughly woken up from your deep sleep by a pair of stormtroopers announcing that your presence was required elsewhere. Neither were you pleased that it was dead in the night when you were ushered from your quarters, hastily dressed in your uniform (assigned to you on your first day) and then led down the dimly lit corridors, your questions falling on the silent ears as neither of the two troopers answered them. You were mildly panicking by the time they stopped in front of what appeared to be a rather large hangar, the enormous space void of any officers and troopers on duty, and to add to your distress was a single spacecraft, one you recognized as the Lambda-class shuttle, parked in the middle of the hangar, its ramp open as though waiting for you.

You almost started to back away, your back hitting against one of the troopers until the voice of Darth Vader carried across the large space. “You are dismissed,” he directed at the troopers as he stepped out of the shuttle wearing his full suit of armor. 

The troopers immediately complied, ushering themselves out of the presence of the Dark Lord and then you were left staring at Vader, your insides churning from all the unpleasant possibilities as to why he requested your presence in the first place. 

“Come,” he broke the silence, turning his back and going back up the ramp. You were still rooted to the spot, unable to move until he turned around and with a more firm voice that left no room for argument gave you a command. “Come  _ here _ .”

Begrudgingly you complied, warily eyeing Vader as you approached him. “Are we going somewhere?” you couldn’t help but ask.

He didn’t respond as he watched you go up the ramp and past him, and you had the urge to roll your eyes if it wasn’t for the fact that you were somewhat stumped as to what you were doing aboard an Imperial shuttle with none other than Darth Vader himself. You stopped inside the compartment as you felt his cape brush against your legs when he walked past you towards the front of the shuttle and then with a booming voice that almost made you jump, turned around and indicated towards the pilot chair. 

“Sit.”

You stared at him with wide eyes. “What—”

“ _ Sit _ ,” he repeated again, this time with more malice in his baritone voice.

You made it towards the cockpit just in time when your legs caved in under you and you collapsed on top of the chair Vader was pointing to.

“Vader—”

“First rule of flying,” he started without any sort of preamble. “ _ Always _ do a preflight check, even if you are short on time. A few seconds of time spent checking all the controls can save your life when you least expect it, especially if your spacecraft is under attack.”

You immediately sat up straight, looking up at Vader’s mask in wonder. “Are you actually going to  _ teach _ me how to fly?” you couldn’t help the excitement in your voice.

“Pay attention,” he snapped and you frowned, sagging further inside the seat. He shifted his body, a noncommittal sound escaping his vocoder and then leaned forward, pointing with his gloved fingers towards the controls in front of you. “These will notify you if there’s anything wrong with the ship on the display monitor,” he gestured towards the lit-up monitor in the center of the control panel. He flicked the controls on and the ship gave off a few positive beeping noises.

“The landing gear switches,” he continued, motioning towards the box with lit up blue and white lights. “The engine start levers along with the control yoke,” he gestured towards what looked sort of like a steering wheel, one in front of you and one next to the empty chair off to the side. He made you push on the engine start levers, the shuttle coming to life with a humming noise as the engines on each side of the ship under the folded wings burst to life with a blue beaming light that you could see through the transparisteel window. 

“The throttle,” he gestured to a stick in the middle of the console, a push in whichever direction would either accelerate or decelerate the ship.

He continued listing things, pointing in various directions to different controls and buttons, your mind going hazy with all the information. Everything almost jumbled together as he identified the controls that looked exactly the same be it orbital maneuvering display system or the combat maneuver panel or even acceleration compensation display. None of those technical terms made sense to you and by the look on your face Vader must have noticed the same because he stopped speaking, his gaze on you. 

“Right,” you cleared your throat. “So what are those for?” you gestured towards the more pronounced round buttons on the center of the console. 

“ _ Those _ ,” Vader started. “Are the weaponry engagement controls. This shuttle is heavily equipped with the forward-facing double laser cannons, two wing-mounted double cannons and a retractable rear-mounted double laser cannon.”

Your mouth hung open as you listened to him, having no desire whatsoever to even touch anything in vicinity of those controls. 

“But you won’t be practicing firing today,” he finished. “Strap in.”

You gaped at him. “Wait,  _ what _ ?”

Instead of answering you, Vader sat himself in the co-pilot chair next to you while you stared at him. 

“Vader—”

“Engage the sublight engines like I instructed you,” he continued. “Watch the velocity indicator on your screen and the warning lights and if you need, you can use this handle to brake your speed,” he gestured towards another lever next to the throttle. 

“You want  _ me _ to  _ fly _ ?” you screeched, staring at Vader as though he’d grown two heads. 

He turned his helmeted head your way. “I thought I made it clear that was what you were doing.”

“ _ No _ ,” you shook your head. “No, you  _ didn’t _ ! You didn’t tell me  _ anything _ !”

“That was  _ your _ idea,” he pointed a gloved finger your way. 

“I know,  _ I know _ ,” you sputtered, at loss for words, your heart hammering inside your chest from sudden fear overtaking you. “That was a  _ bad _ idea, forget it—”

“ _ No _ ,” he snapped. “You  _ will _ fly, and you will do it  _ now _ .”

“I never even learned how to drive a car!” you screamed back. “And you want me to  _ fly _ a freaking  _ ship _ ?!”

“A shuttle,” he nonchalantly corrected you, unbothered in the least by your outburst. “I would not entrust you to fly a ship.”

“And you trust me to fly  _ this _ ?” you narrowed your eyes. 

“I don’t see the reason for your reluctance,” he hissed. “I’ve already explained everything to you.”

“Yeah, well,” you hissed back. “Explaining is  _ one _ thing. Actually  _ doing _ it is  _ another _ .”

“I always found a practical approach to be more useful,” he countered back and you could have hit him right there and then if your hands weren’t shaking. 

You had no choice but to accept his ridiculous idea to let you fly, because with the press of the button close to his side, the ramp was retracted inside the shuttle and the doors sealed shut and then the blaring noise of the hangar bay indicated that the magnetic shield was about to be unlocked. You watched in silence as the shield disappeared, giving you a clear view of the dark vacuum of space behind it and you gripped the controls with a deathly grip after making sure for the third time that your straps were secured around you and sealed tight to the seat. 

“The landing gears,” he reminded you and you hesitantly unlocked them, feeling the shuttle’s legs retract inside the belly compartment of the spacecraft before you felt the craft lift up from the polished floor of the hangar bay. 

“Now go slow—” Vader started but in your nervousness you lurched the shuttle forward with enough force to topple you forward in your seat.

“I said  _ slow _ ,” he barked, and then immediately strapped himself into his own seat, perhaps realizing that he’d made a huge mistake to let you fly. 

“I know— I’m sorry,” you cried, feeling another onset of anxiety attack creeping in as you approached the edge of the hangar bay, your insides churning. 

“Keep straight,” he instructed but you jerked your hand holding a steering control that lurched the shuttle forward and higher up than it needed to be, in the process scraping the upper wall of the exit with the tip of the wing while they were still folded inward.

“I’m sorry,” you squeaked, shooting Vader a worrisome look, not realizing that instead of accelerating the speed you were breaking it. 

You heard him mutter something under breath as he gripped his own controls in front of him and helped you guide the shuttle out of the hangar without any other incident. The wings folded outwards, ready for flight as Vader told you to thrust the engines and accelerate and you did so but with sudden movement that lurched the shuttle forward once again which made you yelp and Vader grunt. 

“I’m sorry,” you wailed again, straightening out the controls. “This thing is  _ very _ sensitive, I’m just not used to it.”

“ _ Clearly _ ,” he rumbled. “Perhaps I misjudged your abilities. I should  _ not _ have used my own shuttle.”

“I wasn’t prepared,” you started shouting back, his comment aggravating you more than it should have. “You didn’t give me any notice and you expect me to— wait,  _ your _ shuttle? As in your own  _ private _ one?”

“Do I have more than one?” he shot back and if you weren’t terrified before, you certainly were now. 

“Why would you let me fly your own ship?” you wailed and then shook your head. “If I crash this thing— “

“You certainly will  _ not _ ,” his voice boomed back.

“How do you know that?” you were looking straight ahead, gripping the controls of the shuttle to the point that your knuckles were white from how hard you were gripping them. “I can probably kill us both by doing something stupid—”

“Unlikely,” he scoffed and you turned your head to give him an incredulous look. “Even if we crash, which we  _ won’t _ , I can survive in space for long enough to send a distress signal and be picked up by my crew. Your odds, however—” he glanced at you just as you were giving him a murderous look. “I’m the best pilot in the galaxy,” he finished and this time you couldn’t help as you rolled your eyes.

“Says who?”

“Says I,” he snapped. “As well as the rest of the galaxy,” he sounded defensive and you smirked, forgetting all about the tension and anxiety in your body.

“That is one thing no HoloNews have ever mentioned in any of the reports I’ve read up on you,” you couldn’t help but tease him.

His vocoder made a peculiar noise, and you had a distinct sense it was supposed to be a snort, one which his vocoder had a hard time picking up. “You were clearly reading the  _ wrong _ reports about me.”

“Oh yeah?” you tilted your head. “So all of them talking about your rather… uncanny ways… you’re saying they are  _ not _ true?”

He regarded you for the moment as you two watched one another. “They are most likely true,” he twisted his mask away to stare out of the transparisteel window. “We are far enough from the Star Destroyer now.”

You glanced out of the window to see the large looming structure of Darth Vader’s personal Star Destroyer to the side of the shuttle and you gaped, for the first time seeing the ship in person. You didn’t even see what Vader was doing until you heard a beeping noise, just in time to see him inputting coordinates into the hyperdrive that he showed you earlier.

“What are you doing?”

“You’ve never experienced hyperspace travel,” he replied and you stiffened. “The safest way to travel through the galaxy is by known hyperspace routes. There are many rogue bandits, bounty-hunters, pirates and even those that are considered to be enemies of the Empire— rebel sympathizers— that would take any chance they can get to ambush an Imperial vessel.”

You frowned. “And you still don’t want me to learn the weaponry system?”

He glanced up at you. “Perhaps later, when you master the basics,” and then pressed the hyperspace lever all the way down and you watched, with wide eyes, as the ship lurched forward and then next second everything blurred together as stars zoomed around you in white and blue streaks of lights, the shuttle flying at the speed of light. 

“That’s…  _ amazing _ ,” you breathed, tension once more leaving your body as you succumbed to the serene scenery in front of you. 

“So I was right,” you heard Vader say and you turned your head to give him a quizzical look. “Your world does not have the means for hyperspace travel.”

You blankly stared at Vader for a moment and then laughed. “Oh no,” you leaned back against the chair. “Gosh, there are still rumors going around if we actually landed on the Moon or not,” you rolled your eyes. “And the rockets they use— they would look primitive compared to your technology.”

“Rockets?” Vader tilted his head, his masked gaze boring into you. 

“Yes, big and bulky and they fly straight up in the air,” you tried to describe it to him in a few short sentences but only ended up confusing him even more. 

“And this  _ car _ you spoke of,” you were surprised to find him in such a talkative mood.

“Oh  _ that _ ,” you smiled. “Imagine it like a hovercraft but on wheels. They’re a rather popular method of travel,” and then you continued describing to him other methods of technology, including trains, boats, and even planes, and before you knew it, the console in front of you beeped, signaling you were about to exit out of hyperspace and you immediately stopped talking, your attention on the view up ahead.

You weren’t quite sure what you were expecting upon exiting the hyperspace but the view that greeted you had taken your breath away, along with the speech as the shuttle exited in front of the various colors of pink, purple, blue, yellow and gray, each of them combined and mixed into an ethereal scenery of the most beautiful nebula you have ever set your eyes upon, because that was the first time you’ve  _ ever _ seen anything like that at all. The stars were blinking around you, the gases moving and the lights shimmering, cascading their rays around and inside the shuttle’s cockpit, and you had forgotten everything as you stared at the sight, even Vader, who wasn’t looking out the viewport like you did, but instead watching you.

You didn’t know how long you’d been staring out the viewport, but when you finally tore your gaze away, your eyes locked on the bottomless gaze of Vader’s mask.

“What are you thinking about?” his questions came as a complete surprise to you and you blinked, tearing your gaze from him to stare out of the window.

“I think it’s beautiful,” you whispered. “Don’t you?”

“Yes,” he was still watching you, his gaze never leaving your face. “It is.”

You smiled once again, a wondrous look on your face. “Do you always take your crew for a scenic ride in the middle of the night?”

Vader huffed. “Don’t get used to it,” he didn’t bother with answering your question as he took the controls of the shuttle and turned it around. “Nighttime is the only time I was able to have some free time.”

You hummed, watching him as he inputted the coordinates back to his Star Destroyer. “Thank you.”

You must have startled him with your response because his arm stiffened when he pulled the lever of the hyperdrive. “I do think you understand that this…  _ endeavor _ must be kept to ourselves.”

You nodded your head, your eyes roaming over his suit and the spot where only a week ago was torn by the bite marks of the monstrous snake. “Are you—  _ alright _ ?” you never had the chance to ask him that because you haven’t seen him since placing him in his bacta tank.

He turned his head your way, the light of the hyperspace route flashing against the black voids of his shiny armor. “Yes,” he replied, his voice void of any emotion which made you frown as you leaned forward in your seat to take a better look at him.

“Are you  _ sure _ ?”

“I’m  _ fine _ ,” he snapped and then gestured with his fingers towards you. “I would suggest you focus on the task ahead.”

You frowned. “What task?”

“ _ You _ are landing the shuttle back.”

You stared at him with horror on your face, your fear hitting you with such force that it knocked you back inside your seat. 

“Vader, no—”

“Yes.”

“ _ No _ .”

“ _ Yes _ ,” he hissed. “And  _ try _ not to damage my shuttle any more than you already did.”

  
You never knew that Vader possessed any sort of humor, but at that very moment you realized with sinking clarity that Vader was a maniac, a sarcastic bastard with dark humor as he leeched off those with fear around him, you including. You certainly couldn’t see the bastard’s smirk gracing his charred lips as he watched you squirm in the seat, your mind solely occupied with soul-consuming fear that you were  _ definitely _ going to crash this ship.


	25. Falleen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to modify the legends a bit with this chapter, about Falleen and the laboratory and other non-essential parts... This chapter might seem like a filler but it's actually quite pivotal in the story and you'll see why later on...
> 
> Thank you for all your comments and kudos ~

When the commanding officer aboard the  _ Devastator _ announced that the ship would be docking above the Falleen system and stationed there for a few weeks, you immediately jumped at the opportunity to request to be taken to the planet’s surface with the rest of the staff. You were tired of being cooped up in the same place for weeks, and you desperately needed some fresh air. Besides, you were quite excited to see a new planet. You only had a limited knowledge of Coruscant and you never had the chance to visit any other planets during your voyage on Darth Vader’s ship so the prospect seemed even more exciting to you than any other time. 

You knew that Vader was coming as well, but by the time you had boarded a shuttle, he had already left ahead using his own private transport. But your thoughts of him were swiftly replaced by the scenery outside the shuttle when it finally broke through the planet’s atmosphere. It reminded you of Earth, with its luscious rainforests and peaks of icy mountains in the distance, as well as areas of flat plains and industrial parts which resembled some settlements scattered across the planet’s surface. You were headed straight for the capital, the shuttle docking on the outskirts of the city and then you were ushered on another transport that would take you straight to the research outpost, which was the reason why the Imperial presence was here in the first place. It had something to do with the bacteriological laboratory, which was established shortly after the Empire was formed. 

You wished you had time to explore the capital, but spending time alone and unsupervised in the laboratory (and you presumed having access to the outside) was enough to please you. There would be no Doctor Syko, and no presence of Vader looming around the corner. So when you finally arrived, you instantly separated yourself from the rest of the staff and wandered the empty corridors of the laboratory, stopping once in a while to look through the glass windows of the rooms to see what was there. 

It was when you finally ventured outside, feeling the heat of the sun on your skin that you smiled, a gentle breeze picking up some strands of your hair and softly caressing your skin. You looked straight ahead to see the intricate foliage of the rainforest and without further adieu, you ventured out, making sure that no guards were in the vicinity of the outpost that could stop you. You took your time walking through the forest, stopping once in a while to admire some exotic animal or a plant that you’ve never seen before and before long you were deep in the woods, the outpost no longer distinguishable through the thick vines and leaves of the forest.

You found a small clearing, the sunlight shining on the patch of grass and creating a soft cascading light down on the ground, and you imagined for a moment that you were in some sort of fairytale as you closed your eyes and simply enjoyed the nature around you, sounds and smells mixed in to instantly calm you down and take all your worries away. You were just about to lay down when you heard a snap of a branch and you whirled around to find a set of reptilian eyes staring at you from the distance.

You didn’t mean to scream but by then you were already moving away from whatever it was was watching you, stumbling in your steps as you ran through the rainforest, as fast as your legs could carry you and your terrain allowed you, vines and leaves snatching on your clothes and scraping against your uniform. You weren’t even sure if you were heading the right way, but you were too terrified to look back to see if the thing had followed you. You were stupid to venture out by yourself, without first inquiring about any dangers this world had to offer. You didn’t see the thick branch on the ground until it was too late, your legs tripping over it and you fell on the ground in a heaping mess, right on top of an exotic flower growing out of the ground and let out another scream when something sharp pierced your skin.

You glanced down to see what looked like a thorn sticking out of your finger, and then watched in slow motion as it dissolved through your skin, and before you could react, it was gone, leaving your finger with just a tiny red mark, the only indication that something was even there. You finally snapped from your initial shock, looking around yourself for any signs that the  _ thing _ had followed you, and when you were fairly certain you were alone and unharmed from your fall, you made your way back to the outpost, feeling blessed enough that you were going in the right direction all along, forgetting about the incident with the flower all together by the time you made through the doors to the laboratory, only to smack head first into someone’s chest.

“My, my,” a male’s voice purred and you raised your head to stare at the most beautiful creature your eyes had ever set on. Beautiful and  _ exotic _ , because your eyes were not deceiving you when they raked over the man’s green features, reminding you of a lizard with small scales covering his body and prominent spinal ridges sticking out of his back, black hair cascading down his shoulders, drawn into a tight ponytail, his blue eyes staring down at you. You briefly wondered if that was what a real alien would like if they were to ever inhabit Earth. You were snapped from your stupor when the creature continued in a husky voice. “What a rare find to find such a  _ fine _ specimen on my home-world.”

You reeled your head back. “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there—”

“Oh no,” the reptilian continued. “No need to apologize. I must say our encounter was meant to be.”

Something about this man was off and you tried to act nonchalant as you stepped away. “Right, I must be going—”

“An Imperial, eh?” the man continued, blocking your way as his eyes raked over your uniform. “I wasn’t aware that Lord Vader kept any women aboard his ship. Especially women such as yourself.”

You blinked. “Um,” you weren’t quite sure what to say to that so you stayed silent, your eyes darting to the empty corridor behind the reptilian, mentally cursing that no one was there to help you out. 

“What do you say I take you out to dinner?” he asked and your eyes widened, staring at the man with a bewildered look on your face. He chuckled at that and then leaned forward, his blue armored robes shuffling in the process until his face was right next to yours and he lifted his clawed fingers to stroke your face. “What a  _ beautiful _ sight,” he murmured and you blushed, unconsciously leaning into the man’s touch. 

You felt a sudden heat envelop your body, your senses tingling as you looked into the reptilian’s eyes, finding them to be a beautiful color of blue (more captivating than Vaders— why were you even  _ thinking _ about him?) and you let out a soft wail through your slightly parted lips, all of the sudden wanting the man’s hands to roam all over your body, wanting him to quelch a sudden desire coursing through your veins.

“That’s it,” the reptilian murmured as he stroked your jaw, his fingers trailing down your neck, inching closer and closer to your chest. You moaned, your skin burning with fire, your insides clenching as you felt the first heat of arousal hit you. You didn’t even care if he took you right here and then, you just wanted him inside of you this instant and—

“Xizor,” a deep baritone voice called from somewhere next to you and the next second the reptilian’s hands were gone from your body, replaced by something more solid and cold, and you shivered, your head spinning.

“Lord Vader,” Xizor replied, disdain clear in his voice. “I was expecting you to take longer with my father.”

“The negotiations ran with no setbacks this time,” Vader growled, and only then did you notice that the cold you were feeling was radiating from Vader’s own hands encircled around your waist, keeping you upright against his chest.

“I see,” Xizor replied, his gaze darting down to you, your face still flushed and your breathing ragged. You were feeling miserable, and  _ hot _ , and you couldn’t deny the fact that if Vader wasn’t supporting you, you would have fallen over from the sudden weakness taking over you, making your knees feel like cotton. “It is a pity.”

Vader shifted his stance, a barely suppressed growl escaping his mask. “I suggest you keep away from my officers, Falleen.”

“Your officers?” Xizor sneered, baring his bright teeth, a definite contrast against the tone of his skin. “Or your  _ women _ ?”

Your vision was swimming and your hearing too muffled to hear what else was being exchanged between Xizor and Vader, because the next moment you were roughly tugged behind Vader as he stalked towards one of the empty rooms and none-too-gently tossed you inside, locking the door behind him as you stumbled against the wall. 

“This is the  _ second _ time you’ve put me in this position,” Vader growled as he advanced on you, pressing you against the wall with his body. “I  _ told _ you to stay with the crew—” you weren’t paying attention to any of the words he was saying, your attention solely focused on the bulk of his form and how large he looked against your small body and how it would feel to be pinned—

“Are you listening to me?” Vader’s voice snapped you from your lucid daydreaming, his gloved fingers grabbing your chin to tilt your head. You weren’t expecting to feel a jolt when his gloved fingers connected with your skin, nor another wave of heat going through your body straight to your core, and you let out a soft moan, unable to stop yourself as you leaned yourself closer to his body.

Vader jerked, and instantly let go of you, to which you protested by trying to reach for him, only to meet with nothingness as he completely stepped away from you with a lightning speed. You tried reaching for him again and this time he roughly grabbed you from behind, dragged you over to the metal tub positioned in the corner of the room and dropped you inside, and before you had the chance to crawl out, he splashed a bucket of iced cold water on you.

“What the hell?!” you screamed, the fog instantly clearing from your head as you sputtered, your hair and uniform soaked.

“Feeling  _ better _ ?” was his response, sarcasm and menace leaking out into the tone of his modulated voice.

You blankly stared at him, trying to remember what happened. You were talking to that reptilian man and then—  _ nothing _ . You could only remember bits and pieces, a snippet of conversation and then your wanton thoughts about Vader— you paled and then flushed, darting your eyes away from Vader in sheer embarrassment. 

“I take it as a  _ yes _ ,” Vader snapped. “Now get up. Your time on this planet is up. You will be taken straight to the ship.”

You suppressed a sniffle, crawling out of a tub, feeling more miserable than you’ve ever felt in your life. You didn’t know why, but Vader’s reaction was hurting you more than it should have, and the way he was dismissing it as your own fault— it was all bearing down on you, making you feel like you’d explode with tears any minute.

He didn’t say another word, and neither did you, when he transferred you over to the troopers as though loading off a bothersome burden off his shoulders, and without even glancing your way stalked off towards the outpost while you were taken back to the ship.


	26. Company.

You would be lying if you said you weren’t surprised to see Vader stalking in through the sliding doors of the medbay that same night following your… _episode_ with the reptilian. You didn’t even care to learn for his name. In all honesty, you didn’t care about any of it, wanting to fall through the face of the galaxy and forget that the day ever happened. But no, for some miraculous (and unfortunate for you) reasons, Vader decided to grace you with his presence, and the sight of him only made you sulk further inside the seat in front of your station, trying to pretend like you weren’t in the room. 

“Lord Vader,” Syko was already hurrying over to escort Vader to his hyperbaric chamber, and it occured to you that it must have already been a month since Vader’s last monthly maintenance. “Right this way, sir,” the doctor continued, getting ready to unlock the door and in your mind you were already planning on retreating back to your quarters as soon as Vader disappeared behind the metal doors, until his voice broke through your thoughts.

“I will require help with the matters,” he briskly responded.

“Ah, well, of course— sir, I will certainly be glad to assist you—” the doctor started but he was rudely interrupted by Vader.

“No. Your _assistant_ will be sufficient enough for my needs.”

Your mind didn’t initially register Vader’s words and you continued to ignore his presence by looking down at your datapad, until Syko stepped in your view and snatched the datapad from your hands.

“Get up, _girl_ ,” he hissed, his sunken old face looking more wrinkled when he looked enraged. “Do _not_ make Lord Vader wait.”

You looked from Syko to the perfectly still figure of Vader standing by the metal doors, his mask turned your way, as though expecting you to follow him. You tried to school your features, but after the initial shock wore off you couldn’t help but scowl. 

“Why does he need _me_?” the tone of your voice must have sounded especially disdainful, because Syko’s face turned from pale to an ugly mixture of purple. 

“How _dare_ you—” he hissed and then stammered his apology to Vader. “My _sincere_ apologies my lord,” he started and you rolled your eyes, practically snorting, which was not missed by Vader, his hidden gaze still trained on you. “She is yet to learn of the proper protocols, perhaps it would be prudent for me to assist you today—”

“No,” Vader cut him off again. “I want _her_.”

You had a few tasteful comebacks and insults to throw his way as you begrudgingly made your way to him after Syko practically dragged you upright from your chair, but you refrained from voicing them in the presence of the doctor, biting your tongue to the point of tasting blood as you were forced to enter the chamber with Vader in tow. 

It was only after the second set of doors sealed shut and the air inside the chamber was compressurized to Vader’s comfort when you finally voiced your disdain.

“What do _you_ need?” you snapped as you crossed your arms over your chest, glaring at Vader as you stood some distance away from him.

“Watch your tone,” he snapped back. “I will only allow so much of your disrespect towards me—”

“Oh right,” you interrupted him. “Or you’ll kill me. Gotcha,” you couldn’t help the snide tone, nor did you honestly care how Vader might react to it. 

Something akin to a growl escaped Vader as he stalked towards you, his fingers already in your face as he hissed. “Do _not_ tempt me. I can easily crush you without using a Force—”

“I don’t see what’s stopping you then,” you shrugged. “Maybe if I actually _die_ here, I might wake up to find myself in my own world, away from this nightmare.”

You were expecting to upset him further with your comment, perhaps even force him to act on his threat, but instead you were met with silence, his mask staring down at your face while your own gaze looked away from him, having no desire to want to look at him and recall the moment on Falleen. 

“Is that— what you want?” he finally asked, his voice losing all the menace and threat he was projecting just some moments ago. You simply shrugged, still avoiding to look at him. “I—” he started. “That’s not what _I_ want.”

You scoffed. “Then what the hell do you want?”

He made a pause and then with some reluctance (and was it trepidation?) answered you. “I want you to help remove my suit.”

You finally turned your head to look at him. “You have your droids for that.”

“I know,” he replied. 

This wasn’t the answer you were expecting and you fought the urge to roll your eyes again. You were doing that quite a lot in his presence as of lately. “I don’t understand,” you started. “I’m not even properly trained in this. Besides, this would take much longer and—”

“I don’t care,” he interrupted you. “I just want it to be you.”

Did he want to ridicule you again? Punish you for what transpired earlier that day? Was that why he was forcing you to do the tasks that his own droids were here for? You gritted your teeth, fighting sudden rage taking over you, feeling of misery settling in the pit of your stomach.

“ _Fine_ ,” you ground out. “Let’s just get this over with,” the sooner you did what he asked of you, the sooner you’d be able to leave his presence. 

It was much easier to maneuver around him this time now that he wasn’t bleeding to death and in extreme pain and your movements were more solid, albeit hurried, since you knew what you were doing. He didn’t have to direct you and you worked in silence, first removing his helmet and mask, once again avoiding to look at his face, feeling his gaze on you as you worked on removing the rest of the upper armor off. 

It was when you were working on removing his belt when he finally spoke in his own raspy voice. “You’re angry with me.”

You couldn’t help but snort. “I suppose you can read my thoughts now?”

“I don’t need to read them to see it with my own eyes,” he replied, his breath steady albeit slightly short. “And no— I still can’t read them,” he added after you remained silent.

You were tugging on his gloves (you were somewhat intrigued to see his right arm fully repaired and reattached after the incident with the snake) and were about to reach for the seam of his inner suit when he stopped you with his words.

“Is this about Falleen?”

You _really_ did not want to talk about it. “You should probably save your breath,” you replied instead, your tone clipped and sharp. “I would rather not have to carry you all the way to the tank unconscious.”

“You disobeyed my orders,” Vader continued as though he didn’t hear you. “I specifically told you—”

“ _Yes_ ,” you snapped, your patience wearing thin. “Forgive me for my curisority to want to explore another world,” your comment was dripping with pure sarcasm and you yanked the top of the suit with extra force.

You were startled when Vader’s metal fingers closed around your hand, stopping your movements as he firmly held you in his hold. 

“Falleen is not a place to wander by yourself,” his voice was quiet, void of any anger as you watched the junction of his metal fingers entwined with your own flesh skin. “Especially for a woman—”

You snorted again. “Well— glad we covered the basics,” you were trying to pull your hand away but Vader only tightened his hold, pulling you back to him. 

“That’s not what I meant,” he rasped. “Falleen men— and women— they all have powerful pheromones,” he paused to let his words sink in. “if I didn’t find you there in time, Xizor— he would have—” he trailed off, and you didn’t need him to finish his train of thought. You knew what would have happened had Vader not stepped in on time. You finally raised your head to find his eyes.

“And you couldn’t have told me that _before_?”

“I didn’t think— well I wasn’t sure if pheromones would even work on you— see as you are untouchable by the Force I assumed—” he stumbled with his words.

You shook your head. “But did you have to be such an _ass_ about it?”

He stared at you in shock, so you huffed and dropped your gaze, resuming the work of undressing him. You were just about to pull the leather suit past his hips when he stopped you once again.

“I’m sorry.”

You froze, shooting your gaze upwards to find his own gaze on your face. You couldn’t help but note the color of his eyes— _blue—_ but so unlike that of Xizor’s. 

“Okay,” you blurted out, unused to Vader’s apology and quite unsure of what else to say.

His lips twitched, the corners lifting slightly into what you presumed was a form of a smile which was concealed by heavy scarring on his face. “You know I don’t throw away the apologies just at anyone,” he started. “Or any at all.”

“Yes, I’ve noticed,” you dryly replied and his smile fell like it was never there to begin with. “Can we finish this so I can go?” you were still quite displeased with his actions earlier that day, and all you really wanted was to be left alone with your own thoughts, away from Vader’s piercing gaze.

“Am I that repulsive to you that you can’t stand another minute in my presence?” his voice instantly took an icy tone. “Or do you need another boost of pheromones to want to touch me?”

His words hit you like a ton of bricks and you stumbled away from him as though being shocked from an electric current, your eyes wide as you stared at him. 

“ _What_?” you managed to choke out. 

He snarled, his features twisting into an angry scowl. “Or do you claim not to remember?” he continued, raising himself to his full height. “Fine then, get out,” he hissed.

He stalked past you, heading straight for the medical droids in the corner, the heavy thuds of his metal feet hitting against the hard floor of the chamber. When you failed to move, because you couldn’t, still rooted to your spot, he flung the equipment around the room with the surge of his power.

“I said _get out_ ,” he snarled again and this time you moved, a shuddering sob wrecking through your chest that you didn’t even know you were holding in until tears sprung free from the corners of your eyes. You crossed the room in quick steps heading straight for the doors before you stopped, unsure even yourself why you needed to tell him anything at all when all you wanted to do was run away.

“It reminded me of Earth,” you choked out, trying to contain your tears. “Falleen— I just wanted to see for myself— and then I blacked out,” you bit your lip. “And the next moment I’m soaking wet and _you—_ ” your voice hitched and you really wanted to rub at your eyes, just then remembering that Syko was on the other end of the airlock and that he’d see you cry and—

“It was your _own_ doing,” Vader hissed and if anything his words enraged you even more as you spun around and shouted.

“How was that _my_ fault?” you balled your hands into fists, digging your fingers into your skin just to ground you enough not to do something stupid, like wanting to slap Vader across the face. “I didn’t know— you told me just _now—_ and then you went ahead and made me feel ever _worse—_ ”

It was Vader’s turn to snort, although it came out more like a muffled raspy choke. “I suppose we are even then.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

His face twisted into a sneer. “This is why I prefer _droids_.”

You were about to retort back with an angry remark but something in the tone of his voice stopped you. “Then why would you let me—”

“Because I just wanted your _kriffing_ company,” he shouted, and his breathing changed as he gasped for breath, his time breathing on his own swiftly running out. 

You were stunned by his response and it took you a while to answer. “I just thought—” you shook your head, instantly feeling guilty. “I just thought you wanted to mock me— for earlier.”

Vader only grunted, his breathing becoming more ragged and by then you were already moving towards him. “What are you doing?” he snapped, glaring at you as you stopped in front of him.

“I have to finish undressing you.”

“The droids can do that—”

“Then you would have asked _them_ to do it instead of me,” you countered, already directing him to sit so you could finish taking the rest of the suit off his lower body. 

You both were silent after that, each in your own thoughts, your own mind replaying what transpired between you and Vader over and over again that you didn’t even register him speaking again after you were ready to guide him to the bacta tank.

“It’s been five years,” he sounded tired, almost reserved in the way he was speaking. 

“What?” you looked up and froze when you saw the look on his face, somehow not realizing how close his face was to yours that you could see every different-size scar littering his pale features. 

“Since anyone besides the droids has ever touched me,” he quietly admitted. “Sometimes I forget I’m even human.”

“But you _are—_ ”

“That’s not what most say about me,” he took a ragged breath and by then he noticed the look on your face. “Do not _pity_ me— I deserved the punishment that came my way by the hands of my old master.”

You were ready to argue that no one ever deserved what happened to him but his face nearing yours had made you forget altogether what you were going to say to him in the first place.

“I thought you were a dream,” his voice was but a whisper, so quiet you had to strain yourself just to hear his words. “All those years I thought I made you— and your world up— delusional with my own pain and grief... and yet here you are.”

You were frozen, captivated by his eyes that you missed the metal fingers stroking your cheek, his gaze roaming over your face, and for a brief moment you thought he was going to kiss you (and in the back of your mind you _wanted_ him to) when he leaned forward to close the space between your faces. But instead of feeling his charred lips against yours, he was pressing his face against the side of your neck, his nose nestled in between the strands of your hair, taking another long ragged breath as he inhaled your scent.

“You smell like flowers,” he softly marveled, and somehow _that_ made it that more intimate than if he’d kissed you. “I haven’t smelled anything like that since—” since the accident. Since he was confined into his suit. His coughing fit had broken the spell he had on you.

“Let’s get you into the tank,” you offered, guiding him to it and helping strap him to the supports that would then lift him inside the tank.

“Will you stay?” he’d asked you before you had the chance to place the breathing mask on him and you paused your arms mid air to look at him. 

“Do you want me to?”

“Yes— I’d like that— only if you wish to,” he added.

He was willing to let you stay during the whole procedure. To see him so vulnerable— and broken as he saw himself— while you would watch him being prodded and poked by the droids as they performed various of the tests to ensure all his electronics and life support systems were running as they should. 

So you stayed. Because he’d asked you. Because he wanted your _company_. Because he didn’t want to be alone. And because this time you didn’t want to leave him, recalling the time when you abandoned him back on Earth. You weren’t going to make that mistake twice. 

You stayed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...This was a difficult chapter to write... my thoughts were jumbled all over the place when I was typing it and I did it in the middle of the night so my brain was fried... but nonetheless I left is as it is without changing much of anything. Just two people who are angry with one another in one way or the other and who can't communicate for shit. This is what they get. 
> 
> I legit had lump in my throat typing out the dialogue between Vader and reader... Vader's pain, his vulnerability... it kind of hit me in the gut. I hope I managed to deliver that same sensation to all of you who are still reading this story. This was sort of depressing... hopefully not too much to ruin your moods and your weekend lol.
> 
> Thank you for continuing to like the story. I love all your comments ~


	27. Machine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for all your kind responses! I'm so overwhelmed with joy that you're liking the story so much. With that in mind, I just wanted to apologize ahead of time that you are probably going to hate me after this chapter... but the 'heavy angst' tag is there for a reason. I'm sorry ;_; *hides away*

You were practically flying down the corridors of the Star Destroyer, unshed tears stinging your eyes, your breathing ragged. Not because you were out of breath— even though you were— but because your chest felt constricted, as though something was pressing down on your ribs, causing you to choke. 

You could not believe this. After everything that had happened… should you have been surprised? You almost laughed at yourself. You probably shouldn’t have but you were too naive— too trusting. You had fallen right into the trap and you were a willing participant. You couldn’t even be mad at yourself as much as you were mad at  _ him _ . Scratch that— you were  _ livid _ . 

So when you burst through the doors into what you knew to be Darth Vader’s personal quarters, a sectioned off area on one of the floors designated exclusively for him, you weren’t expecting him to be in the company of an officer— some sort of Imperial insignia on the man’s uniform which you never learned the meaning of nor did you care too much about any of it at the moment, startling the man who was already deathly pale and standing rigidly by Vader’s desk, perhaps on the verge of dying for some ridiculous mishap. You hardly gave a shit about it.

“What the fuck is  _ this _ ?” your voice was so rigid that you almost choked out the words, tossing a datapad at Vader— who in his stunned silence failed to stop it with the Force as it hit him in the chest, miraculously missing the buttons of his life support unit. “Have you been  _ spying _ on me?!”

Vader, for his sake, had recovered almost immediately, looking down at the cracked datapad lying on his desk and then back at you. “What is the meaning of this?” he growled, and had an audacity to sound… perplexed that you had the sudden urge to strangle him right there and then. 

“I should be asking  _ you _ this!” you hissed, stalking up to the desk. You weren’t even looking for that datapad— it just happened to be sitting there on Syko desk and you were intrigued enough to pick it up. Until you found the contents inside of it, making your blood run cold. “You tricked me! You deliberately assigned me to that damn medical wing to  _ spy _ on me—”

Vader made a noise and suddenly the room had gotten much colder, the oppressing air so dense that it was hard to breathe. You disregarded it all together. The man, on the other hand, had gone deathly white and gulped, shooting you a warning look that practically screamed that you had pushed Vader too far. You didn’t care. None of it mattered— not the Force, not Vader’s infamous habits of losing his temper, and not the fact that you were missing all the obvious signs that Vader was barely restraining himself.

“We will discuss this at a  _ later _ time,” he hissed and it was the last straw that finally made you snap.

“Like hell we will,” you screamed back. “You never had the rights to do what you did! You violated  _ my _ privacy! You  _ lied _ to me! You  _ used _ me for your own gain— to do the goddamn research like I’m some sort of a rat lab! You’re fucking  _ psycho _ , you know that— I can’t believe I even  _ trusted _ you—” you were having a hard time controlling your tears, but by the end of your rather heated outburst you had given up altogether.

You barely even registered the man’s queasy mumble. “I— I will— if you allow me— Lord Vader—” but was swiftly cut off by the sickly crunching noise as the man’s neck was snapped with a twist of Vader’s fingers, rendering him dead in seconds, his body collapsing on the floor with a thud.

“Look what you made me do!” Vader roared, all pretense of trying to control his rage gone, now that you two were finally alone. His response only fueled your aggression and your emotional unbalance and you sneered.

“ _ Me _ ? That’s all  _ you _ — you kill people left and right, that’s nothing new,” you surprised even yourself at how cold you sounded, how you barely even glanced the dead man’s way, that you didn’t even flinch when Vader killed the man in front of your eyes. Perhaps his casual ways of killing people he deemed were incompetent were rubbing off on you— making you desensitized to the act.

“You know  _ nothing— _ ” he started and you let out a shrill of a scream, fed up with his excuses or whatever else he was going to say to somehow put the blame on you for things he’d done himself. 

“I know  _ one _ thing,” you jabbed your finger into the cracked pad. “This is all the proof I need,” and before you did something stupid, something that your unblanced emotional state urged you to do, you marched off from Vader’s quarters, determined to place as much distance as you could away from him. Your goal was to leave the ship altogether— now that you knew how to fly since you’ve spent a few flying lessons in Vader’s company. You quickly stuffed that thought as far back as your mind allowed you— you didn’t even want to think about him. Now that you knew what he thought of you— what he considered you to be— your heart gave a painful jolt. He never intended to find you a way home… all these long weeks turning into months were spent waiting, hoping. You could have done the search yourself. 

You were just entering the empty lift, trying hard to compose yourself, when you heard the unmistakable thuds of Vader’s boots loudly echoing the way you had come from as though he was running after you and before you could react, he had stalked inside the lift like a madman— with enough force to almost dent the doors that were closing you in. You stood, gawking at him, while the two of you were closed in the tight space, you barely having any room to move away from him. You almost jumped out of your skin when his fist collided with the panel, initiating an emergency halt on the system, stopping the turbo lift from moving.

It took you a moment to realize you were shaking— either from earlier adrenaline or fear settling in the pit of your stomach. If you couldn’t trust this man then what was stopping him from hurting you, or worse— killing you in his fit of rage. Because he could do that, couldn’t he? You were just a nuisance to him, a thorn at his side, and you had just provoked the beast with your words and actions. A deep longing set deep within you— you just wanted to go home. And somehow that thought, the fact that you probably  _ never _ would get home, stuck in this cold place like some sort of a prisoner, made you helplessly whimper.

Enough to cause Vader’s stance to shift, him staring at you through the lenses of his mask the whole time, feeling the glare of his eyes on your skin. “I gave the order to monitor you,” he started, his voice tense and sounding much harsher through the modulator. “It was done without your knowledge— for your own benefit of keeping you safe—”

You snorted. “You have a warped idea of trying to keep someone safe,” you spat.

“Regardless—” he snapped back. “It was done more so to learn of your…  _ condition _ . I thought that perhaps— your lack of midichlorians or your non-existent presence in the Force would be the answer to the enigma of you being here in my world.”

“Or maybe,” you hissed back. “You were just irked enough that you couldn’t use your fucking Force on me, or read my thoughts— that you just couldn’t help yourself but conduct your stupid, pointless, fucking  _ tests _ on me while I slept!  _ Slept _ ,” you repeated again, your voice rising. “I wasn’t even cognitive enough of that— did you fucking  _ drug _ me?!”

You didn’t even register the lift shaking, the walls warping as Vader unleashed all his fury into the Force. “I did what I thought was best for you—”

“Well you didn’t fucking  _ think _ !” you spat back. 

“ _ Enough _ with the language,” he roared. You remembered having to explain to him at one point your own version of the word “karking” when he asked what it meant. 

You couldn’t resist yourself this time as you tried to punch him, hurt him in some way as you reached for him, only for him to stop you with his own hands like you were nothing. You screamed and thrashed in his hold— all to no avail as he slammed your back against one of the walls and held you there in his grip. 

“Let— go of me,” you finally screamed, after exhausting all your strength to get yourself out of his steeled grip. 

“Not until you calm down,” he replied, which forced you to get worked up all over again.

“You fucking  _ bastard _ ,” you tried to kick him, only resulting in hurting your own foot as it collided with his durasteel shin and you howled in pain. “If it wasn’t for your fucking suit—” you hissed. You probably would have best him if he wasn’t wearing thick layers of armor— and if he was limbless. You probably would have gouged his eyes out. 

“ _ Calm down _ ,” he snapped this time, digging his fingers into your sides.

You did, shockingly, realizing that you wouldn’t accomplish anything with trying to get out of his hold until he decided to do so himself. “I want to go  _ home _ ,” you declared instead.

“I’ve done all the research I could,” he started. “I already told you your system does not exist—”

“I don’t believe you,” because you honestly didn’t.

“I’m telling you the truth— you did the search yourself— you saw with your own eyes—”

“The Empire could be blocking that information,” you interrupted instead, your mind whirling with all the possibilities you could have overlooked. “Just like you blocked anything and everything about your previous identity from the galactic network.”

“That’s—” he hesitated. “There would be no point for the Empire to do that— even during the Clone Wars I have  _ never _ stumbled upon your star system.”

“And you could be lying,” you looked straight at the opaque sockets of his mask. “Because what’s what you do best. You  _ lie _ .”

His vocoder made a distorted noise. “I  _ never _ lied to you—  I may have withheld the information from you but I  _ didn’t _ lie.”

You were past the point of giving a shit about what he thought. Perhaps it reflected in your eyes — or in your own expression— because Vader made another noise, sounding almost anguished. 

“I knew you would be against the idea— but I had no choice. I had the droids conduct the research—” you flinched. You told him you didn’t like the droids, instead preferring a human touch, opposite of what he preferred. He disregarded your opinion for the sake of doing what he thought was justified. 

“...I don’t care,” you finally whispered, all the fight leaving you. You just wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep.

“You don’t understand—” he started but you shook your head, feeling suddenly drained, almost lightheaded. You’d been feeling quite odd for the past few weeks ever since Falleen. 

“I don’t want to,” you choked, looking away.

“[Y/N]—”

“I want to leave.”

“You  _ can’t _ .”

“So you’ll just keep me here, locked away?” you looked up again. “Like a prized possession?”

“You’re not— that’s not—” he stumbled but you had already decided on your next action if you couldn’t leave Vader’s ship as he so insisted. 

“I don’t want to step foot in that medical lab  _ ever _ again,” your voice was quiet, distant even to your own ears.

“Alright,” Vader sounded uncertain, perhaps sensing that you had more to say and you did.

“And I don’t want to be in your presence ever again,” you continued.

“[Y/N]—”

“ _ No _ ,” you shook your head. “I refuse. I don’t ever want to see you. I don’t want to treat you—”

“ _ Please _ ,” was it you or did Vader sound desperate.

“—you have your droids for that,” you finished. “After all, it only makes sense for the machines to work on the machine. There’s no place for humans next to you since  _ you _ lack a human heart.”

Vader jolted out of your reach as though you shocked him. And perhaps you did, not physically, but mentally, with your own words. You knew you hurt him, wounded him like he wounded you, but you wanted to make him feel just as miserable and desperate as you currently felt. And if it took a few harsh words, then so be it. You were past the point of caring about what he thought. He made it clear to you with his actions what he thought of you. Nothing more than a lab research. It  _ hurt _ but you’d take all the time you needed to process all of it later on, confined in your own room, locked away for days. 

“...If that is your wish,” was his own thick response after he stared at you for what seemed like forever. You couldn’t see behind the mask but if you could, you would have noticed a wet sheen on his scarred cheeks.

You didn’t respond. You didn’t need to. You’ve said everything you wanted to say. It didn’t even register in your mind that the lift was moving until it chimed that it arrived at the floor your quarters were on. 

Vader hesitated for only a moment. “I—” he paused, shaking his head, the notion so subtle with his helmet and mask it was barely distinguishable. You imagined him wanting to apologize, but you both knew it would do nothing, so he didn’t. But before he disappeared he told you something you didn’t know— something that would haunt you for days, keeping you up at night.

“Elena Dalle— before her  _ accident _ five years ago— it wasn’t an illness which claimed her to succumb to a coma— it was a drug given to her over long periods of time to suppress her abilities,” Vader paused at the threshold of the lift’s doors. “She was once a Force-sensitive, hidden from the Jedi’s plain sight. Her parents deemed it necessary to hide her from me— once they learned of the attack on the Temple. The dose they gave her— her body went into a shock.”

You stared at him with wide eyes. You didn’t read any of it. There was  _ nothing _ on the file about you that said anything about it. How did he—

  
“Now there’s  _ nothing _ , not even a trace that the body you inhabit had once carried midichlorians in her blood. If I didn’t conduct my tests I would have  _ never _ found the truth—” he trailed off and then as though he made up his mind, he swiftly exited the lift and left you staring at the empty spot long after he disappeared, and long after the lift was impatiently beeping for you to get off. 


	28. Headache.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A much shorter chapter... but I needed to break it down like that once I started typing the rest only to realize it wouldn't fit into this one. Mind the tags: some mild blood.

It started as a simple headache that wouldn’t go away. Then the pain progressed into a migraine— leaving you immobile for a whole day. You attributed it to the recent events, after you and Vader had a nasty fallout. You hadn’t seen him since then, and it had been at least a week, maybe two. During that time you stayed in your quarters, keeping to your claim that you didn’t want to be anywhere near the medical wing, and luckily you weren’t forced to be. You tried to make your way down to the hangar bay earlier on in your self-imposed lockdown, but the fact that your access to it was denied and that several stormtroopers were forced to escort you out back to your own quarters told you everything you needed to know. Vader was keeping to his own promise— you weren’t allowed to leave. Which left you with the only thing to occupy your time— your own thoughts. 

That was when you noticed the unusual tiredness and fatigue settling over you, forcing you to take more rests and naps. Then the headache— and then, when you had just woken up from your nap to head into the fresher, you noticed a fresh smear of blood on your clothes. You rushed to the fresher to confirm your suspicions— you had a nose bleed. And it wouldn’t  _ stop _ . The blood continued to gush out even when you forced a plug made out of your own clothes deep into your nose— it only soaked the cloth through and forced you to change the plug. By the third try you knew something was wrong.

And if you knew anything about nose bleeds, it was that if you couldn’t stop the heavy flow within the first ten minutes, that something was  _ definitely _ wrong. Because if you could recall, you  _ never _ had a nosebleed. Not in that magnitude. Not that it caused you to become dizzy and faint to the point where you had to lean against the wall to support yourself. There it was again— that lightheadedness. The room was spinning around you, forcing you to close your eyes and take a deep breath. This wasn’t a respiratory infection— at least you could confirm that by the feel of your own lungs. Which meant that you had sustained some sort of injury.

You almost lost your balance when you whipped your head, sudden realization coming over you. Was it the tests that Vader ordered to be conducted on you? Was it some sort of a side effect? What sort of  _ tests _ did he perform on you? You never even asked him that— you hadn’t had much of a chance to read a full report. You only had enough time to realize what it was you were seeing on that datapad to come up with your own conclusion, the rest forgotten. Now you wished you didn’t throw away that damn datapad at him in the first place. You wanted to know— you  _ needed _ to know what the hell was done to you. 

So you made up your mind, stuffing a new plug into your nose, leaving your bloodied clothes on as you made your way towards the medical wing— much slower to your own frustration while you had to support yourself leaning against the walls, ignoring the strange looks of bypassers, mainly stormtroopers as they watched you from their positions. Maybe you should have changed— or waited until you could stop the nosebleed. You were almost certain this would be reported straight to Vader. But then again, what would he care?

To your dismay you found Syko in the medical wing. You were hoping to interrogate one of the droids, alone. But then it couldn’t be helped— you were feeling quite irritated so the bonus of having an actual human being overrode any unpleasant associations you had with Syko. You actually  _ wanted _ him to be the burden of your misery, it would be too gratifying to actually yell at him and see him squirm. 

“What did he do to me?” you demanded, startling the old man. He looked up and then, if it could be any more possible, paled even more upon seeing you. 

“I’m sorry? What—”

“Vader,” you marched up to the man, careful in your movements in order to maintain your balance. Your head was still spinning. “What did he do to me?”

“I’m afraid I don’t follow—”

“Cut the bullshit,” you snapped. “What  _ tests _ were performed on me? What did they inject in me? What did they use to cause me to  _ bleed _ ?” you gestured to your face, but then you didn’t really have to. The doctor was staring at you with wide eyes, his gaze continuing to drift down to your nose. 

“They were routine checks,” the doctor stammered. “Nothing more than some blood samples—”

“Stop  _ lying _ ,” you screamed and then almost collapsed if it wasn’t for you catching your fall against the desk. “I’ve been dizzy, I’ve been tired—  _ drained _ , I’ve been having constant headaches and now  _ this _ ,” you hissed. “Do not take me for a fool— I’m a fucking  _ doctor _ .”

The doctor stared at you, perhaps at loss for words when he failed to come up with a response. You huffed, feeling more tired. You needed to sit down.

“These are unusual symptoms,” Syko finally spoke. “I haven’t seen anything in your file about any sort of sickness or illness—” you shot him a glare. If you weren’t so focused on remaining standing upright you would have shouted at the fact that now  _ he _ had access to your medical records. “Perhaps if we conducted further research—”

You cut him off with a high pitched cry, glaring at him with such venom that if looks could kill he would have evaporated from acid in an instant. 

“Screw you and your  _ research _ ,” you spat. “You’re  _ not _ touching me— I don’t want you or your droids  _ ever _ touching me again.”

You turned around ready to storm out— at least you thought you did— but then everything just spun, and you didn’t have a chance to catch yourself this time. You thought you might have heard someone shout, maybe it was Syko or your own voice, but the last thing you remembered was falling— and then everything went dark. 


	29. Insufferable.

You woke up to the sound of steady beeping. You were comfortable, nice and cozy, and warm, and for a moment you thought you might drift off to sleep again. There was no splitting headache, no ache in your body— and if you concentrated for a moment you might have thought you just imagined everything— because you were feeling just fine. Then the beeping noise broke through your consciousness again— and this time you realized with a start that it sounded suspiciously like a heart monitor, or something equivalent to that. Then everything clicked in place and you opened your eyes.

Your worst fears were confirmed when you found yourself lying on the bed in what appeared to be one of the rooms in the medical wing aboard the Star Destroyer. And if your situation couldn’t get any worse you found a droid hovering over you, adjusting something above your right arm. And when you looked to your right you almost screamed. There was what looked to be an IV tube lodged deep within your vein, dripping some sort of liquid inside of you. You panicked— and the first thing you did when you realized you were able to move was smack the droid’s metal appendage away from you, startling the hunk of metal as it beeped with an indignation sort of noise. 

“You must remain lying down—” the droid started when you were scrambling to sit up but you ignored him. You had to get out of here. To think that you were brought here while you were unconscious so Vader could do more tests on you— you almost started crying right there and then. “Do not touch that—” the droid beeped in alarm when you yanked on the IV tube, ripping it out of your arm. You hissed, pressing a hand over the wound to stop the bleeding. 

“I cannot allow you to leave,” the droid continued. “You must remain—” you growled and then reached for the droid, manually overriding it as you shut it down. Useless thing. You looked around, finding the bacta patch lying on the station next to you, so you used that as you pressed it against the wound. 

Only then did you notice that you weren’t wearing the clothes you came in. If anything, you weren’t actually wearing clothes, just what appeared to be some sort of a medical gown. You flushed and then growled, your initial shock turning into insatiable anger. There were certain limits you wouldn’t pass— and this was one of them. Not only was your privacy violated but also your dignity. Was Vader present when you were being undressed? Did he have the satisfaction of watching you being so humiliated— so _used_? You gritted your teeth, trying to stop your tears. You were all alone in this metal hunk of space— cold and stark naked. You couldn’t even use anything to cover yourself, unless of course you used the blanket on the bed. So you did just that— just in time for the doors to swoosh open. The wheezing sound of Vader’s respirator instantly filled the room.

“What are you doing?” he demanded, just as you wrapped the blanket around you. “Why are out of bed— Where are you _going_?”

You were already marching past him, barely even sparing him a glance. You were too angry to even want to speak with him. Or look at him. Or be anywhere near his presence. Vader, apparently, had other plans as his figure dominated your vision, blocking your exit.

“I asked you a question— where do you think you are going?”

You counted to ten to try and even out your breaths, staring at the blinking lights of his chest box. “Where are my clothes?” you couldn’t hide the irritation in your voice, your fingers digging into your arm beneath the blanket to try and ground yourself.

“That’s _not_ what I was asking—”

“Where— are— my— clothes?” you hissed this time through clenched teeth. 

Vader paused. “You have a new set being delivered as we speak.”

“Where are my old ones?”

“Thrown out,” he answered. “I don’t see why—”

“Thrown out?” you repeated. “Just like that?”

“I fail to see how that’s relevant—”

“ _Because_ ,” you snapped, finally looking up. “You _undressed_ me.”

He stared at you. “I did _not_ ,” he finally answered, perhaps finally catching on as to why you were so upset. “Your old ones were smeared with blood. Which I might add—”

“That still does not excuse your actions,” you seethed. 

“ _My_ actions?” he was starting to lose his own patience by the tone of his voice. “These were not my orders. You were under the care of Doctor Syko. I was only informed of your condition _after_ you were brought here. By then you were under the droids’ care—”

You made a noise, highly unbefit that of a grown adult. “I told you _no_ droids— yet you insist on doing things that are out of _my_ comfort zone. Along _other_ things—” there was no point arguing, because he would never understand. And you were starting to get another headache, a growing ache somewhere at the front of your head. You didn’t even realize you were wincing until Vader picked up on it. 

“Get back to bed,” he barked and you scoffed at that.

“Like hell I will,” you spat back. “You think you can just continue _experimenting_ on me?” you were starting to get worked up again.

“That’s not—” his vocoder made a choked noise. “Do _not_ make me force you back inside the bed myself.”

“Try it,” you hissed, narrowing your eyes. “Or God help you I _will_ smash one of those buttons on your chest.”

He was having a hard time restraining himself if the creaking of the walls around you was any indication of how much of his mythical powers he was holding in as to not erupt the whole medical wing in one giant mess. 

“You’re _insufferable_ ,” he finally snapped.

“Oh,” you scoffed. “And _you’re_ not? I can call you by other names but I think we already covered the basics the last time we had this… discussion.” 

“You’re _not_ leaving this room,” he declared, deciding to ignore your comment for his own sake.

Oh, how much were you itching to act on your promise to smash one of those blinking buttons. He was testing your patience. Again— and again— and again. 

“ _Fine_ ,” you spat, stalking away from him to the opposite corner of the room— and away from the bed. “Happy?”

“No,” he hissed and then he finally noticed the dripping IV on the floor. “Did you rip that out of your arm?”

You almost rolled your eyes. “I know how to take those out— I think I’ve done plenty of those on you and many patients before you—”

“You shouldn’t have done that,” once again he disregarded your comment, his focus shifted to something under your blanket, perhaps the arm the IV was in that you were hiding from his view. 

“Yes, I should have,” you gritted out through clenched teeth. “I won’t let you poison me with whatever you were injecting me in the first place—”

“I wasn’t—”

“Whatever tests you performed on me made me feel like— like _shit_ ,” you couldn’t come up with a better word to describe how you felt for the past few weeks.

“That wasn’t my doing—”

“And now I feel just _fine_ ,” you continued, interrupting him once more with your heated tirade. “So you will cease this _immediately_ and let me go—”

“You’re feeling fine because of _this_ ,” he roared, pointing to the dripping IV. “You collapsed unconscious— you’ve been _sick_.”

“Sick because of _you_ ,” you screamed back. “I was feeling just fine before all this! What the hell did you do to me?”

“ _Nothing_ !” this time the glass shattered around you and you couldn’t help the startled scream that escaped past your lips. You were staring at Vader with wide eyes, your heart hammering inside your chest while he stood motionless on the other side of the room. “I did _nothing_ ,” he repeated more slowly once he was able to calm down. “You can read those reports yourself. They were just routine checks— blood samples. I don’t— there is something _wrong_ with you.”

You snorted at that, rolling your eyes. “There is _nothing_ wrong with me,” you seethed. “And you _will_ cease your probings.”

“You are not in a position to give me orders,” Vader bellowed. 

“Then don’t intrude on my privacy,” you hissed back. “No more testing and no more droids.”

The creaking of the leather of his suit was deafening in the silence of the room. You thought he was going to argue with you more but instead, to your utter surprise, he only made a disgruntled noise as though he had given up on this battle with you altogether and swiftly walked towards the exit of the room, leaving without saying another word. You stared, wordlessly, after him, trying to figure out what had just happened. Vader never ceased to surprise you— and even now after yet another fight with him, you were left wondering where it all went wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, she is still in his world and yes, they're still arguing. But not for long ^^ Hey, at least they're talking... again.


	30. News.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow... wasn't expecting to tick some people off with my last chapter. Let me just say this here before you dive in to the next update. If you're already hating on the story I suggest you don't read the rest because you're going to hate it even more. Can't say I'm sorry but that's how I've _always_ envisioned where it's gonna go. Because we're finally here. 
> 
> P.S. I'm sorry for not replying to all of your comments but TBH... the negativity was exhausting and I had a long busy day. Even if most of you were very supportive ~ so thank you!

_ Are you going to tell me what’s wrong with me? _

The answer to your simple question would haunt you for days. You thought it was simple— because up to that point you thought you still believed that your symptoms were a mere side effect of Vader’s transgression on your privacy— after his attempts at conducting research behind your back. Even after the headaches were back, even after the migraines had gotten so bad you couldn’t properly think, rendering you immobile— somehow you still refused to believe the truth. Even after the nosebleeds, which returned not long after you were allowed to return back to your quarters, you were stubborn in your determination to stay put and ride out the symptoms yourself, without any medical help. You thought you could deal with the fainting spells, with the dizziness, with constant aches in your body— until you had a convulsion. A  _ seizure _ . 

Which brought you back right where you started— back in the medical wing, back in the same room, strapped to the machines while you were unconscious and recovering from the sudden onset of an unexplainable illness. You didn’t even have strength in yourself to protest when you finally came around, your sight landing on the wrinkled face of Doctor Syko as he hovered over you. You numbly thought that at least the droids weren’t around— perhaps a coincidence of the moment, or perhaps Vader had finally acknowledged your dislike of the droids. 

By the grim look on the doctor’s face you knew that something was wrong. Your body felt tired, unusually heavy, and you had a hard time controlling it, like you lost control of the steering wheel, watching from the drivers side as the car moved itself along the highway. It was an odd feeling— even more odd than what you were feeling before you had the seizure. You should have known right away, you had all the textbook signs of what you were experiencing before it happened. You blamed your stubbornness, along with other things.

“Tell me,” you urged him when you finally found your voice, when you were finally well enough to sit up on the bed, still hooked up to wires and tubes, supplying you with the necessary nutrients. You didn’t pull on them this time— you didn’t have the strength nor energy to deal with it. You had a sudden aloofness about you, like you were too exhausted to fight the inevitable. 

“It is too early to say,” the doctor started, his voice carefully controlled. “More tests are needed—”

You watched his face. “You already know,” you interrupted him. “I can tell. You have that…  _ look _ .”

You’ve seen it far too many times on your fellow colleagues at work. When they tried to compose themselves, when they tried to be professional yet compassionate enough to announce some bad news— preparing themselves for what was to come from the recipients of those news. 

Syko’s features stiffened for a fraction of a second, like you had taken him by a surprise, but he quickly composed himself. “You need a much needed rest,” he replied instead, not what you were hoping to hear. “Your body sustained some injuries after your…  _ episode— _ ”

You reached for him, grabbing a hold of his hand before he had the chance to move away from the bed. “Don’t you think I ought to know?” you tightened your hold on him. “You’ve already done the bloodwork samples— you have a record of my recent ones as well. Something  _ must _ have come up.”

The doctor had a sudden fear flashing behind his eyes. “Lord Vader had given me  _ specific _ instructions—”

You shook your head. Somehow you weren’t too surprised that it was Vader’s doing to hold Syko’s tongue. What you were surprised about was the fact that you couldn’t even have the energy to be angry with him about it. You should have— but it was a lost cause with him.

“Vader is not here at the moment,” you replied. “And it’s  _ my _ health we are talking about— not his.”

The doctor hesitated. “Once I receive the most recent report perhaps then I’ll have a much clearer idea—”

“How bad is it?” you interrupted him, your voice distant but firm. 

“I’m sorry?”

“My illness,” you continued. “It  _ must _ be bad, right? I mean— nosebleeds and now seizures,” you laughed, but it was cold and void of any emotion. “Some sort of blood disorder? Blood clots? Or is it something else entirely? Do I have a tumor in my brain— I mean that would explain the migraines —”

“No,” Syko’s voice was surprisingly soft, unlike anything you’ve ever heard from him. “Nothing of the sorts…” he stopped, shifted his stance and then glanced at the door as though expecting Vader to be walking in at any moment. You drew his attention back by tugging on the sleeve of his uniform.

“Tell me,” you urged him again, your voice pleading.

He sighed. “I have yet to discover the reason for it,” he carefully started. “But it seems your body is rejecting… its surroundings. It’s attacking itself— if not stopped, your symptoms will get worse and then eventually…” he stopped, seeing the realization dawning on you. He didn’t have to say more, you already knew what the outcome would be.

“...And— how long?” you cleared your throat, suddenly feeling like it was about to close. “How long till…?”

“A few months,” he picked up on what you were going to ask. “Perhaps more, perhaps less… but with the way your illness is accelerating and your immune system breaking down… I’m afraid it is the latter outcome.”

You had grown too numb to process the news. “And… does Vader already know?”

The doctor nodded his head. “Lord Vader is fully aware of your condition. He had received the results earlier today.”

You didn’t want to think what Vader would do with the news, were too scared to think what he  _ could _ possibly make you do— would you spend the rest of your days here in this room, strapped to the machines?

“I suppose there’s no way to cure this… is there?” you automatically asked, felt  _ obligated _ to ask. You already knew the answer to that too. 

“...Not at the moment,” the doctor replied. “I’m afraid the fact that your body lacks the midi-chlorians is the main cause for your body to start rejecting its surroundings. I have never encountered a being without even the slightest count of these organelles… After all, midi-chlorians are necessary for life to exist. You are simply…” he once again stopped.

You simply did not belong here. You were never meant to be in this world. Just as Anakin Skywalker was never meant to be in your world. The universe was trying to fix the mistake. It was trying to get rid of you— the  _ abnormality _ . 

“I see,” you replied absentmindedly and then suddenly you zoomed in on the doctor. “Where is Vader now?”

You had certainly surprised the doctor with your off-characteristic question. He was most likely expecting you to break down— instead you were asking about Vader— the last person you wanted to see right at this moment. But you  _ had _ to see him. Before he got any ideas inside his head about you— about your health. 

“I believe he’s relaying this information to your mother as we speak,” you stared at the doctor with a mild shock, expecting anything  _ but _ that. You had almost forgotten about Lumiya Dalle— about your “mother” who was also recently widowed at the hands of none other than Vader himself. 

“He  _ called _ her?” you were baffled to say the least.

Syko had given you a funny look. “Of course not— Lady Dalle is here, aboard the ship. Lord Vader personally requested for her presence.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I scratched the whole thing and re-written this chapter after I had been thinking... But yes. The inevitable illness was part of my plan long before I started writing this story. I'm sorry if it made you sad :/
> 
> Also... sorry for any medical inaccuracies. Mind the tag :3 Didn't realize so many people here were with some medical background or even doctors lol.


	31. Nothing.

Your heart was hammering inside your chest when you finally found what you were looking for. You’ve never been in these parts of the ship— the lower levels of the detention center, or what some called, the interrogation cells. You shuddered, increasing your step, as much as your weak body allowed you to. You managed to pry the needed information from Syko, managed to distract him enough to escape, managed to get down there without getting noticed. You were shaking, rightfully so— either from fear or from the illness— you weren’t quite sure. You only knew one thing— you had to get to Lumiya on time before Vader did something foolish. 

Your progress was stopped when you were met with several stormtroopers guarding the entrance to one of the cells. Your pulse quickened— you’ve found the place.

“State your business,” one of the troopers gruffed through the modulator in his mask. 

“I’m here to see my mother,” you replied, trying to keep your voice steady. “Lumiya Dalle— she arrived here earlier today.”

The troopers exchanged looks. You didn’t find the comfort in their silence. 

“This is a restricted area,” one of them finally replied. “You do not have the authorization to see the prisoner.”

The  _ prisoner _ . Your palms were sweaty and you were fighting shivers.

“She is my  _ mother _ ,” your voice hitched. “That should give me all the right to see her—”

One of the troopers moved towards you, his steps menacing. Your eyes flickered to the blaster he was holding in his arms. Would he actually try to harm you?

“Can you tell Lord Vader that I’m here?” your voice shook. “I know he’s inside.  _ Please _ ,” you added when none of the troopers moved. 

Finally, one of them closest to the door lifted his arm, engaging his comlink to what you assumed to be Vader’s frequency, hoping and praying that Vader would answer your pleas and leave the room. You couldn’t hear what was being exchanged but it took a while— your hope swiftly dissipating— until the doors to the cell finally swished open and Vader stepped out, followed behind by the interrogation droid. You would have collapsed right there and then at the sight of the black orb if you didn’t try hard to maintain the appearance that you weren’t sick. 

You tried to look past the door but Vader’s body stepped in your line of sight, the doors swishing shut behind him as he made his way towards you.

“What are you doing here?” you shivered at his cold tone.

“Where is she?” you demanded instead. “Where is Lumiya— what did you do to her?”

You weren’t trying to sound so worked up, but you couldn’t help the gasps in your voice. You were still too exhausted to move, your body feeling sluggish and your senses disoriented. You were in no position to stand— and suddenly your head spun and you would have collapsed but then someone caught your fall, and you instantly recognized the feel of Vader’s armor against your skin.

“You’re in no position to stand,” he echoed your earlier thoughts as he picked you up to your swift alarm, carrying you away from the prisoner block. 

“No— wait,” you were trying to twist in his arms. “Lumiya— what happened to her? Why did they say she was a prisoner?”

Vader tightened his hold on you, refusing to answer your questions. You weren’t giving up just yet, still fighting him until you realized where he was heading— back to the medical wing.

“Vader—  _ wait _ ,” your voice took a panicked tone. “Don’t take me there—  _ please _ .”

And still he refused to answer, at which point you were earnestly starting to hyperventilate. “Can’t we just… talk?” you stammered out and he finally paused in his step.

“ _ Talk _ ?” his modulated voice was rather cold and distant. “So  _ now _ you want to talk?”

You almost reeled away from the hostility in his voice. Something about him was off— some sort of black cloud— a menacing aura around him that was seeping into your skin. You hadn’t recalled that about him in all your time that you spent with him. 

“Yes,” your voice quivered yet you refused to look away from his mask. “Talk— just not in  _ there _ ,” you were referring to the medical wing.

“You need medical help—”

“I  _ know _ ,” you interrupted him, your throat suddenly going dry. “But I don’t think anything would help me now. So what’s the point of locking me in that room against my will?”

You had stunned him speechless, his body stiffening. Not the reaction you expected from him. “You  _ know _ ?” did he honestly sound so surprised. 

You sighed, all the fight leaving your body, making you feel hollow and defeated. “Of course— and don’t take your anger out on Syko. Regardless of how much I dislike the man— I was pretty persistent,” you gave him a tired look, knowing he would understand what you meant perfectly. He did call you insufferable after all for a reason. 

He was still silent and you resorted to finally pleading with him. “Please— I don’t want to go back there.”

“You can barely stand,” he pointed out.

“Then I’ll sit,” you hadn’t given up. “Anywhere is fine.”

He finally grunted, making a sharp turn away from the medical wing, carrying you to the turbolift and up a few floors until you recognized the floor on which you stopped. He was taking you to his quarters. You weren’t going to protest— you did tell him anywhere was fine after all— and then you were inside his quarters, the same place where you had your fallout (it seemed so long ago) and then he set you down on what looked to be a never used couch as he stood in front of you.

“Well then—  _ talk _ .”

You swallowed. Why did all of the sudden it was much harder to speak with him? “Lumiya— “ you started, keeping your voice even. “What happened?”

Vader grunted again. “I don’t understand why you would care for a woman that had given up on you,” he spat. 

You tried to take even breaths. “Regardless of what happened— she is  _ still _ Elena’s mother.”

“You mean a mother that poisoned her own child for years?” Vader raised his voice. “That made her overdose on the drugs— forced her into a comatose state?”

“I don’t think she had much of a choice,” you replied back. “She was scared— she must have been scared of  _ something _ . You said so yourself— she was trying to hide her daughter’s abilities—”

“And look at what happened,” Vader roared and you flinched. “Your body is now incapable of fighting this illness because of that woman’s poor judgement.”

“You don’t know that,” you murmured. 

“I  _ do _ know,” Vader hissed. “Your body is attacking itself— you have no immunity against this world— you are  _ dying _ ,” why did he sound so anguished over your impending death? 

“Lumiya is not to blame for it,” you swiftly tried to change the subject. “Why was there an interrogation droid with you?”

“ _ Because _ ,” Vader snarled. “I wanted to  _ break _ that woman— I wanted to extract every piece of her rotting thoughts out of her head— I wanted to know the  _ truth _ .”

Your breath hitched in your throat as you stared up at him. “And  _ did _ you?” your voice was choked. “Did you break her?”

Vader’s silence was your answer and you couldn’t help but look away from him with tears in your eyes. You were too  _ late _ . 

“And did you find what you were looking for?” your nails were digging into the palms of your hands. 

This time it was Vader who made a choked noise. “She only possessed the name of the drug— one I had already done a research on— there was  _ nothing _ in her mind about how to reverse its effects— not even in the Sith texts— I-I already looked.”

You were staring straight ahead of you. “Did you know that he died?” you suddenly asked and Vader stirred.

“What?”

“Alexander Walker,” you elaborated, your mind distant as memories flooded in your mind of the day you found out. “He died from  _ pneumonia— _ of all things.”

Vader stared at you. “How is this  _ relevant— _ ”

“I always wondered,” you continued. “Was it  _ your _ presence that kept the man alive? Maybe he was already dead— and you were some sort of passerby in his body.”

“What are you—”

“And then when he died… they couldn't find even a trace of the substance in his body — the midi-chlorians… it was like they were not even there. Peculiar, isn’t it?” you finally looked up.

“I don’t give a  _ kark _ about him,” Vader hissed. “It’s  _ your _ life that is on the line—”

“Exactly,” you were surprised how calm you sounded to your own ears— how  _ cold _ . “Maybe it’s not the drug that caused this body to not possess any of the midi-chlorians. Maybe it’s just me.”

“I don’t understand,” Vader sounded even more agonized.

“ _ Anakin _ ,” you sighed— you weren’t even aware that you called him by his old name. “I’m not supposed to be here. Don’t you understand? The roles are reversed— my consciousness was transferred to this body— an identical replica of my other self— along with one thing that differs me from Elena Dalle. I never possessed any of the midi-chlorians back on Earth— you told me so yourself. Your world is just trying to fix its mistake.”

“ _ Fix it _ ?” Vader snarled. 

  
“I’m  _ meant _ to die,” you whispered. “And there’s  _ nothing _ any of us can do about that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eh... another depressing chapter... I'm sorry ;_;  
> It's almost Christmas time and it should be a _happy_ time of the year yet here I am with my sopping and heartbreaking chapters.   
> I was having somewhat of a hard time writing this chapter for some reason. Maybe because it's now extremely awkward and tense between the two, yet the unexpected illness bridged them together, unwillingly. Idk... let me know how you feel about this.


	32. Time.

It took a lot of arguing. That’s the only way you could describe how the last few days had gone once you announced your theory to Vader. He was less than pleased, and if anything he was that much more insistent about you going back to the medical wing. 

“But I _don’t_ want to,” you wailed at one point, tired of trying to explain to him over and over again that it would do you no good.

“I don’t give a kriff about what you _want_ ,” he spat back. “Doctor Syko proposed some ideas, some treatments that could help—”

“No,” you shook your head.

“Don’t you _understand_ ?” Vader was losing his own control. “The longer we wait, the less chance we have that something _could_ work.”

You scoffed, shooting a displeased glare at the datapad he’d given you earlier with the proposed treatment. Vader was willing to go through a blood transfusion. Of all the things you thought, _that_ was the least one of them you were prepared for. He was willing to give you his own blood— a chance for your body to receive the needed midi-chlorians. Was it a coincidence that he was a perfect match as a donor? You might have thought so, but you could only guess what could happen should it _not_ work. If your body was already attacking itself, then adding another foreign body to your system could only make your condition worse. You could very much die— a risk Vader knew but was too fixated on the chance that it could work. 

“I understand very well,” you replied. “But forcing me to go through this… I asked for my own autonomy. Why can’t you understand _that_?”

“Just as you’ve allowed me my own choice?” he roared.

“What are you even talking about?” was there even any point with this argument— you were tired, oh so _tired_. 

“Back in your world,” he growled. “When I asked you to not bother with me— yet you insisted on treating me.”

“That was _different_ ,” you jumped to your feet, glaring at him. “And if I remember correctly you soon assumed that I would _always_ be there, even after you treated me like… like some sort of… like your personal servant,” you finished, for better lack of word. 

Vader growled. “My chances of survival were far worse than yours are,” he pointed out, ignoring the whole comment about you calling him out on his less than ideal treatment of you back on Earth. 

“But you _survived_ ,” you couldn’t help but blurt out. “You are _here_ , in your own world. What if— what if when I die… I’ll wake up in my own world?”

You couldn’t help but notice how Vader’s body flinched. “And what if you don’t?”

You shook your head, sighing as you collapsed back on the couch. You were back in his quarters. Vader insisted that if you weren’t going back to the medical bay then you’d be closely monitored by either the droids or him personally. You chose the latter option. 

“I don’t know,” you finally replied after a long beat of silence. “I think… I think something happened before I woke up in this world. I don’t remember much… expect pain. And blood,” your voice cracked. 

Vader soon joined you on the other end of the couch. “There must be some sort of explanation.”

You couldn’t shake the feeling that he might be right— that there was a chance that you wouldn’t be waking up in your own world. “How— what happened before you woke up in the hospital?” you were always wondering about that.

“You know the answer to that,” he growled. “My old master decided to leave me for dead after he—” he stopped and then let out what seemed to be an agitated sigh. “When I finally regained consciousness I was on the operating table on Coruscant. I thought I dreamed up the whole thing.”

You stared at him with a shocked expression on your face. “But… you were on Earth for at least two months… close to three,” you exclaimed. 

“According to the Emperor… I was only out for a few hours,” Vader replied. 

You thought about the new information, your thoughts whirling inside your head. “And it’s been five years since then…” you whispered.

“Yes.”

“It was only a moment for me,” you continued as though you were in a trance. “One moment I was on Earth and the next moment…” you shook your head. Lumiya had told you you were in a coma for the last five years. But could it be… that you were just transported into this body immediately, prompting you to wake up? What if Elena Dalle’s own consciousness was gone? You _were_ just a passerby after all. 

“ _Time_ ,” Vader finally spoke at your side before he jumped to his feet. 

“What?”

“Time— the Force— it all makes _sense_ ,” he was not making _any_ sense to you. 

“Vader, what are you—”

“You must go with me to Mustafar.”

“Wait— _what_?” you were staring at him like he had sprouted some wings or horns from his head. 

“It contains the focal point of the Dark Side of the Force,” he was rambling, pacing in front of you, engrossed in his own thoughts to pay any attention to you. 

“Hold on a second—”

“The key…” he abruptly stopped as he turned to you. “You _will_ come.”

You could hardly find any words, still staring at him with wide eyes. “And what the hell is Mustafar?”

You’ve heard of that name before— Vader had told you about it at some point, a slip of conversation but you were never curious enough to ask, and even forgot about it with everything that was going on. But somehow _that_ place held an important part, some sort of key in everything, something that was crucial in Vader’s life. You just didn’t know _what_.

“A planet,” his voice was back to its monotone tone, void of any emotion. “You’ve seen it before— through my flashbacks.”

You were trying hard to remember what he meant by that, scrunching your face in concentration until it dawned on you.

“You’re _kidding_.”

___

You realized with a sinking feeling that Vader was, in fact, _not_ kidding. If anything, you were now very concerned that there was something very _wrong_ with him. Maybe some sort of mental damage was done to him after his accident that forced him to build a freaking _home_ on the hellish rocks of the lava planet. You were staring at him the whole time he was descending, and still refused to take your eyes off of him when you were both safely inside the black structure of his fortress. 

“ _What_?” he finally snapped when he couldn’t take any more of your staring. 

You stirred. “Should I be… concerned?” you slowly started, your mind still refusing to believe that you were actually on this damn planet— in _person—_ after you’ve dreamed of this place in your vivid nightmares.

“Concerned about _what_?” he was refusing to look at you.

“ _You_ ,” you started. “I mean… that’s just… _disturbing…_ even for _you_.” 

He finally looked at you. “I’ve built this place in remembrance for what happened here. This place allows me to hone my abilities in the Dark Side. It proved to be useful so far.”

You were too stunned to speak for a moment. You’ve known patients suffering from PTSD from these types of accidents but most people would rather shun away from things that triggered their episodes rather than face them full force. Vader, in fact, was using his tragedy for something far worse. Instead of healing and trying to forget about what happened here, he used any means necessary to torture himself— over and over again— in what he called his ways of “hone his abilities” whatever the hell that meant. 

“Don’t look at me like that,” he finally broke the silence. “I requested this planet to be my homeworld.”

“ _Why_?” your voice broke.

“I already told you—”

“Why are you doing this to yourself?” you continued, not allowing him to speak. “Why all this pain— this torture. Why are you punishing yourself?”

Vader gripped the controls of the shuttle in which you arrived. “You don’t know what you speak of.”

“But I _do_ ,” you exclaimed. “This is… _wrong_ ,” you had a lump in your throat which prevented you from speaking further, lest you started crying. 

“We are already here,” Vader announced after he raised himself from the seat. “I won’t leave without answers. Come,” he was lowering the ramp while you were rooted to your seat.

“I don’t want to be here,” you softly murmured. 

Vader growled behind you. “Don’t be difficult.”

You shook your head. “I’m not trying to be. But I _can’t_... “ you couldn’t help the gasp as it escaped you— the first sign that you were barely holding on to your tears.

Vader was in front of you in seconds, turning the chair around so you could face him. “You don’t have to look,” surprisingly his voice sounded softer, even through the vocoder. “Close your eyes and I will carry you.”

“Do we really have to be here?” you couldn’t help the whine but you also couldn’t stop yourself even if you tried— you were _terrified_ of this place. 

“Yes,” of course he’d answer you with that, what else did you expect? “I _know_ I can find the answers here— the Force has guided me before and it will again. _Trust me_.”

You almost laughed at the irony. He was asking you to trust him after he so blatantly destroyed it. He must have noticed your look, or guessed what you were thinking because he reached for you, his gloved fingers swiping at the lonely tear trailing down your cheek. 

“You have no right to trust me again,” he spoke. “But I promise I _will_ find a way to cure you.”

Was it an empty promise, you wondered. Or was it something Vader was trying to convince himself. Because he truly believed there was a way— enough to bring you here when he knew he was the one to send you into that nightmare the night Alexander Walker died. Between the two of you it seemed you were the one to end up with a psychological trauma, more so than him. It showed in the way your body trembled, in the way you were digging your fingers into his armor when he finally picked you up and carried you off the ramp into the depths of the fortress. 

But you weren’t going to close your eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was planning on bringing her to Mustafar at some point and it just so happened while I was typing this chapter that it just made sense to go ahead and send her there. What type of Vader's story would it be if we didn't go to the homeboy's place where he burned, hm? Hope you enjoyed it ~


	33. **Christmas.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to switch it up a little and post a Christmas special. This takes place sometime between Falleen and her sickness... or you could just pretend it never happened and continue on with the story as it is. But this thought wouldn't leave me alone and I wanted to write something happy and funny before diving back into sadness with the upcoming chapters. 
> 
> With that in mind I just want to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy Holidays! Stay safe, enjoy your time with the families and get your bellies filled with all sorts of yummy foods ^^ 
> 
> XOXO~

It all started with the visit to Chandrila, a planet in the Core World of the galaxy. It had something to do with the rumors that the planet was supporting some sort of movements— first stages of rebellion, but of course they were only speculations. Nonetheless, Vader was forced to make a stop there, to appease the Emperor and ensure there was order in the galaxy. You, of course, begged him to take you with him. After the stunt with the Falleen he was more than reluctant to take you  _ anywhere _ . 

“I won’t wander anywhere, I promise,” you were practically running after him down the corridors of the Star Destroyer. 

“This is a mere political visit and nothing more,” Vader replied back.

“And I will stay out of your way,” you were still insistent. “Assign a stormtrooper to me for all I care, I just want to see what it looks like.”

“It looks just like any other ordinary planet,” Vader hissed when he finally arrived at the hangar bay, marching directly to his prepared shuttle, ready for take-off. 

“Maybe to you,” you ran in front of him and blocked his pathway. “You might have seen hundreds of these planets. But to me— I’ve only ever been on Earth. And I haven’t even seen my own planet from its own orbit. But this— this is one in a lifetime opportunity for me,” you might have been exaggerating it a little but you couldn’t help your excitement. “And it looks just like Earth.”

“You’ve said the same thing  _ last _ time,” Vader growled, less than pleased that you stopped him with your nagging. 

You sighed. “I can’t help it— I  _ miss _ my home.”

Vader stared down at you and then a noise escaped his vocoder, and you imagined him rolling his eyes and letting out a frustrated sigh. “ _ Fine— _ but you  _ will _ be escorted,” he gestured for something in the distance and when you turned you found several stormtroopers coming your way.

“You want them  _ all _ to escort me?”

“I’m not taking my chances,” was his response. “If I hear you causing any…  _ difficulties _ , you will be immediately taken back aboard the ship.”

You couldn’t help as you rolled your eyes, your face still turned away from him. “Jesus, you like your control don’t you?”

“What did you say?” Vader growled behind you.

“Nothing,” you smiled at him. “Have a marvelous time negotiating a peace treaty or whatever it is you do,” you waved your hand as you walked away from him in the direction of your assigned troopers. 

You could practically feel his glare on your back, smiling to yourself as you crossed over the hangar bay. Vader’s foul mood wasn’t going to deter you from enjoying your exploration of the planet. Because that’s exactly what you were planning to do.

___

“Uh, mam,” one of the troopers behind you broke you out of your thoughts. “This is past the perimeter of the city. We have specific orders to stay within the range.”

You ignored him, increasing your step as you continued on your voyage outside the city. You thought you saw something in the distance that looked suspiciously like what you thought it was, but you had to first confirm it with your own eyes.

“Mam—”

“I heard you trooper,” you finally replied. “But your job was only to escort me, correct? Keep me safe— out of trouble.”

“Well, yes, but—”

“And that’s what you’re doing,” you looked back behind your shoulder to see several of them trailing behind you. “I’m not doing anything that necessitates for you to report back to Lord Vader.”

“Our orders—”

“No, no,” you shook your head. “ _ I _ was told that I had a free range of where I could go and what I could do. As long as I stayed out of trouble. And all I’m doing now is going for a walk,” you stopped and focused the troopers with your glare. “But you could go ahead and report this to Lord Vader and interrupt his...  _ meeting _ with your pointless reports and then ignite his rage for being interrupted. It’s your choice,” you shrugged your shoulder.

The troopers exchanged looks between each other. “You’re only going for a walk,” one of them finally quoted you and you hid your smirk. Bingo.

So you spent the last hour or so treading through the green foliage of the planet, taking notice of different fauna and flora of the place. It truly was a magnificent planet, covered in greens and blues with a mild climate. And you were right— it did resemble Earth, more so than Falleen. And as far as you knew there were no Falleens lurking around the shadows— it was a mixture of different species, most of which were Humans. If you pretended, you could almost imagine yourself running through the forests of Earth when you were little, camping with your parents.

Your heart gave a jolt when you found what you were looking for and you couldn’t help the squeal that escaped you, startling the troopers. You ran ahead, forgetting about your promise, tuning out the shouts of the troopers until you stopped in front of the dense forest, packed with the all familiar trees.

“Hey, you—” the troopers finally caught up. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“We are far out as it is, we should be turning back,” the other one supplied.

“Right, I’m sure by now Lord Vader is already heading back from the meeting,” the third voiced. “And I don’t know about you,” he directed his helmeted gaze at you. “But I don’t want to be caught in his wrath for disobeying his direct orders.”

You scoffed. “He doesn’t need to know—”

“Doesn’t need to know about  _ what _ ?”

The way each trooper stiffened would have been funny if it wasn’t for the fact that even you could feel the tension rolling off everyone’s bodies at the sight of the Dark Lord walking towards you.  _ Where the hell did he even come from? _

“Lord Vader— sir,” one of the troopers started but Vader simply raised his gloved hand and you cried out.

“Wait,  _ no _ ,” you thought for a second he was going to choke the poor bloke but instead Vader stopped, holding his hand in a non-threatening way.

“I thought I was rather clear about my orders,” he continued, his masked gaze on you.

“Yes, sir—” the trooper closest to you started but you beat him to it.

“It was my fault,” you interrupted, biting your lip. “I… um…  _ persuaded _ them to come with me.”

Vader stared at you, standing motionless and so out of place amidst all the greenery with his black suit that it was almost surreal. “We will discuss this aboard the ship. Come,” he was already turning but you cried out, surprising even yourself when you reached for Vader and grabbed a hold of his large gloved hand, tugging on it.

“Wait, just wait—” he was far too stunned to resist you as you dragged him forward. “Do you know what this is?” you pointed behind you.

The silence that stretched from both Vader and stormtroopers told you everyone were shocked, for different kinds of reasons. 

“It’s a  _ tree _ ,” Vader finally hissed. 

“No—  _ no _ ,” you shook your head, almost laughing. “It’s a  _ pine _ tree,” you exclaimed, letting go of his hand and then stepping away so he could take a better view.

Once again your response was met with silence. They must have thought you lost your mind. 

You finally laughed. “It’s a pine tree,” you repeated, looking at the tree in wonder. “I can’t believe it.”

You felt Vader’s gaze on you so you turned your head to give him a look, then shooting your gaze towards the troopers behind him. If he wanted your explanation, then first he had to get rid of the extra ears, all their attentiveness focused on you. 

“Give us some space,” he ordered and the troopers followed his command without any objections, stepping away from you at once. Only when Vader was certain your conversation wasn’t going to be heard did he finally demand the explanation. “Talk.”

You would have rolled your eyes if you weren’t in such a good mood. “This same tree grows on my planet too,” you told him excitedly as you ran your fingers through the prickly branches, inhaling the smell of pine. “It’s one of the most sought out trees during a certain time of the year.”

You couldn’t help but smile at your luck. During the whole time you spent in this world, you made sure to count the days, trying to ground yourself as you visualized the days back on Earth. And if you did your math correctly, then you were more than certain that it was almost Christmas time back home. The thought brought you happy memories but also made you nonchalantly sad as you realized you would be spending Christmas all alone in the unknown world that didn’t even have the knowledge of such a merry holiday. 

“Certain time?” Vader questioned, his hidden gaze still on your face, drinking in the small smile that graced your lips.

“Christmas time,” you looked at him. “Oh, it’s the most wonderful time of the year,” you couldn’t help but sing the melody, still beaming at him.

“I… see,” he slowly answered and you laughed again, finding it amusing to see him so confused.

“Can I ask for a favor?” you suddenly asked.

“Depends on what it is,” was his automatic response.

“Can we take it back to the ship?” you looked at him with hope in your eyes.

“The tree?” 

“Yes, the tree,” you almost laughed again. “It’s the perfect size too. I think it could fit quite nicely in your quarters.”

“What… for?” you imagined him looking at you with a bewildered look on his face, perhaps considering what was wrong with you to put you in such a good mood.

“Oh, it’s a tradition,” you answered. “Every household has one of those trees— some have fake ones, some have more that one. I personally prefer a real one, it adds a perfect touch to the Holidays.”

“The Holidays?”

You smirked. “If you allow this tree on your ship I will tell you all about it.”

You were almost beyond yourself when Vader agreed— motioning for the troopers to carry the tree when he cut off the base with his lightsaber. It was a surreal sight, having the tree hauled up on the transport and then back to the ship, everyone openly gaping at the object when you finally landed in the hanger bay. The fun was just about to begin.

___

“You need…  _ what _ ?”

You looked up from your spot. “Ornaments— lots of them.”

“What—” Vader stopped, contemplating with himself if he really should know, and then advanced further into the room where you had just finished fluffing up the tree, admiring your work. “I don’t understand the point of it at all.”

“The point,” you huffed as you turned around. “Is to bring joy and happiness. Don’t you have anything similar in your home world where you grew up?”

Vader sneered behind his mask. “The only thing Tatooine ever cared about was Boonta Eve.”

You cocked your head to the side. “What’s that?”

“Commemoration of the Hutt by that name,” Vader replied, stopping arms length away from the tree. “Supposedly he ascended to godhood— a whole bunch of bantha poodoo if you must know my opinion on the subject. But it brought large crowds from across the galaxy to witness a pod race.”

“A race?” you perked up. “Like…”

“A racing sport,” he turned to look at you. “Involving podracers.”

“Huh,” you shrugged. “Well… that’s  _ different _ .”

“Regardless,” he motioned toward a tree. “What sort of…  _ ornaments _ do you require?”   
  


“Well…” you paused for a moment to think. “Usually I would always decorate my tree with glass balls, some hand ornaments, some bows… and lights. Oh… and we need a topper,” you placed your hands on your hips. “But I have a feeling you won’t have any of that on your ship.”

“You are correct—”

“Oh!” you exclaimed. “You could ask your men to see if they have anything on them that they wouldn’t mind giving away… something small.”

Vader stared at you. “You want  _ me _ to ask for their  _ personal _ stuff?”

Your face fell at the absurd idea once Vader voiced it out loud. “You know— never mind. You’re right— that was foolish of me,” you turned your head away. “It can stay bare like this, it really doesn’t matter.”

Vader watched your expression, his hands balling into fists. “Anything could work then?”

“What?” you looked up. ”Oh— in this case, sure. But you don’t need to worry—”

“Come back tomorrow,” he suddenly cut you off. “I have… a meeting here shortly.”

“Oh…” you looked away again. “Right— of course,” you nodded your head and then quickly went around him, hoping he didn’t see your doleful expression. You were completely unaware of the reason for Vader’s abrupt gruffness and neither did you pay much attention around you, because if you did, you would have noticed strange behaviors of most men aboard the ship. 

___

“Do you…  _ like _ it?”

You were staring with your mouth wide open at the display in front of you, not believing your eyes. Because what stood in front of you was not a bare tree, but instead stuffed with all sorts of things you could never imagine seeing on one single tree. It was filled with the most random stuff— silverware, random metal parts, different mechanical tools, droid pieces, even what looked like pieces of stormtrooper armor, useless trinkets, random clothing and other things you didn’t have time to describe in full detail. It was chaotic, it was the most bizarre thing you’ve ever seen, but it was also the most beautiful thing you’ve ever laid your eyes on.

“What’s wrong?” Vader was the first to notice your tears before you even registered them. “Do you not like it? I can immediately ask the droids to clean it up—”

“No,” you shook your head and then smiled. “No— this is…  _ beautiful _ .”

“You don’t need to lie—”

“I’m not,” you cut him off. “I’ve never seen anything quite like that, honestly. But it’s beautiful in its own way,” you walked around the tree, admiring the work. “Did you do this all by yourself?” you found his hidden gaze behind the mask.

“I… had help,” he was reluctant to admit that. “The droids… and I used the Force,” ah, so that explained the reason for some things to look like they were thrown so haphazardly on top of each other. 

“It’s still missing one thing,” you gestured to the top. “A topper.”

“Would this work?” he pulled out one of the stormtrooper’s helmets and you couldn’t help but snort, your body shaking with silent laughter.

“What’s so funny?” he snapped, clearly becoming offended and you had to stifle your laughter to answer him.

“I’m not laughing at you,” you told him, schooling your features. “I just…  _ thank you _ ,” you softly smiled, rendering Vader speechless behind his mask. He quickly snapped himself and placed the helmet on the top of the tree and you nodded your approval.

“I think even your Emperor would find this display worthy,” you joked.

“I doubt it,” was Vader’s icy response and you frowned. “I would rather not talk about him while I’m entertaining you with your silly traditions.”

“Hey— they’re not  _ silly _ ,” you glared at him. “This is supposed to be  _ fun— _ aren’t you having fun?”

He looked down at you. “So… what else does your world do beside decorating a tree?”

“Well… I suppose each culture is different… but mainly exchanging presents and singing Christmas carols.”

“Presents?” Vader was on alarm.

You wondered if you should even be telling him about the whole Santa Claus, but against your better judgment you did, telling him stories of the old past. You could only imagine him scowling behind his mask, perhaps considering your world to be insane for believing in something which clearly was not real. 

“It’s about the holiday spirit, Vader,” you explained to him. “Even if Santa is not real— it’s the joy on children’s faces that makes it the best holiday there ever is.”

Vader was silent after that and you started to think he was questioning his agreement to help you set up the tree but it was his admission that surprised you the most. 

“I don’t have a present for you,” he quietly stated.

“What?” you looked up at him. “Oh— you’ve already given me one,” you gestured toward a tree. “You allowed this tree to take up a space in your quarters and even decorated it,” you smiled at him again. “So thank you— really.”

You could feel his stare on your face. “You’ve been doing that a lot.”

“What?” you frowned.

“Smiling— and laughing.”

“Oh,” you weren’t sure how to take his comment. “Does it… annoy you? I can stop if that—”

“No,” he cut you off. “Don’t. I… I can understand now— about the holiday spirit,” he looked away. “It makes you happy.”

You looked back towards the tree. “It does, doesn’t it?”

“You were singing something— earlier,” he suddenly turned around and walked off towards the far wall of the room. “What was it?”

“Um,” you were watching him with a piqued interest, trying to figure out what he was doing with the panel on the wall. “Oh, well, it’s just one of the songs I liked listening to during Christmas.”

“Can you… sing it?” he sounded unsure and his questions surprised you. 

You laughed again. “I don’t think I’m a good singer.”

“I disagree,” he was dead serious. “Your voice… it’s soothing.”

“Oh— well,” you cleared your throat, suddenly becoming flustered. “Just don’t laugh at me.”

“Never.”

You were still unconvinced but you closed your eyes, recalling the words of the song as you softly started singing it.

_ It's the most wonderful time of the year _

_ With the kids jingle belling _

_ And everyone telling you be of good cheer _

_ It's the most wonderful time of the year _

_ It's the hap-happiest season of all _

_ With those holiday greetings and gay happy meetings _

_ When friends come to call _

_ It's the hap-happiest season of all _

You felt a tap on your shoulder and when you opened your eyes Vader was standing in front of you, and a weird blinking light was flashing behind you, casting glows on his sleek black armor.

“Turn around,” he allowed you the room to do so and when you did you gasped. “I tweaked some old wiring and used some old comlinks and spare droid parts… I don’t know if that was what you had in mind when you told me—”

“It’s  _ perfect _ ,” you cut him off, staring at the display of lights in front of you. The tree was dazzled with it, blinking steadily with an array of colors. 

“It’s the best I could do,” he almost sounded like he was trying to apologize but you instantly cut him off again by turning around and grabbing a hold of his hand. 

“I think it looks just as beautiful as that nebula.”

His vocoder made a distorted noise. “Nothing looks as beautiful as compared to you.”

Your eyes widened at that and you felt Vader stiffening beside you, perhaps baffled by his own admission. 

“Now I know you’re just making fun of me,” you smirked at him.

“I would never—” he paused, realizing that you were teasing him by the mischievous sparkle in your eyes. 

You laughed, tugging on his hand. “Want to know what other tradition I enjoy the most? Something my parents would do on the night of Christmas.  _ Dancing _ .”

Vader stopped you. “I don’t dance.”

You shrugged your shoulders, spinning away from him. “Alright then, suit yourself.”

You started slowly spinning around the room, recalling the fond memories of your childhood. You didn’t even realize you started singing again as you closed your eyes, succumbing to the pleasant recollection of your time back on Earth.

_ There'll be parties for hosting _

_ Marshmallows for toasting _

_ And caroling out in the snow _

_ There'll be scary ghost stories _

_ And tales of the glories of _

_ Christmases long, long ago _

_ It's the most wonderful time of the year _

_ There'll be much mistletoeing _

_ And hearts will be glowing _

_ When loved ones are near _

_ It's the most wonderful time of the year _

This time you were stopped by arms encircling your waist and when you opened your eyes you found Vader holding you in his embrace, his mask tilted down and staring at you.

“I thought you said you didn’t dance?” you raised your brow.

“I don’t,” he agreed. “But I suppose this…  _ event _ calls for a once in a lifetime opportunity for me to learn.”

“Wait— are you telling me you’ve  _ never _ danced?”

“I thought I made it clear,” was his gruff response.

“I just thought… you meant you don’t dance… now. You know, suit and all,” you probably should have kept your mouth shut by the stiffness in Vader’s arms. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that—”

“So, what do I do?” he interrupted you. 

You found it hard to concentrate. “Oh— well— I suppose you can just follow me and I’ll lead.”

“Lead?” he didn’t sound pleased and you laughed again.

“Yes— you’re just going to have to live with yourself and let someone else lead you this one time,” you smirked. “And watch your feet— don’t crush me.”

Vader growled but nonetheless followed your instructions, awkwardly shuffling around that you had to keep your laughter in check lest he would become agitated with you and abandon this feat altogether. He managed to find a rhythm and soon you were moving more easily, growing more comfortable in his hold. 

“Just like that,” you praised, looking down and not noticing Vader’s own stare at you, his focus drawn to your face. “You’re doing quite well despite this being your first time—” you looked up to see his mask near inches from your face. “Um… Vader?”

“What’s… mistletoeing?” 

You suddenly flushed, your cheeks blazing under heat as you stammered your response. “Oh— that— just another tradition.”

“Hm?” suddenly you noticed his arms pressing you almost right against his body. Was that your own heat radiating off from you or could you actually feel his own heat through the leather of his suit? “Tell me.”

You let out a nervous laugh. “It’s actually a very silly one,” you cleared your throat. “Kissing under sprigs of mistletoe. You are allowed to steal a kiss from anyone caught standing under the mistletoe.”

“Is that so?” Vader’s voice rumbled and you shivered in his hold.

“Yes,” you whispered. “But there has to be one hanging above to do so.”

For a moment— just for a split second you thought that Vader would do something. He was still wearing his mask, you thought with disappointment. But if he wasn’t— what would you have done?

“It appears we must search for one then,” he finally announced, snapping from his own daze as he straightened out.

“Wait— what for?” you were confused.

  
“So you could demonstrate that tradition to me,” he answered without missing a beat and you gaped at him. “After all, it seems I should know of  _ all _ your Earthling traditions about the Holiday.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, apparently, Chandrila does have pine trees growing there I just don't know if they're the same ones as the ones on Earth but let's just pretend for the sake of the story :)


	34. Truce.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hit a writer's block with this chapter... which is why it took me so long to post. I had several ideas with how this scene was gonna go and well... took me a few tries and complete rearrangement of some parts to finally come up with his piece. I don't know if I like it enough but if I spend any more time on this it will just drive me insane. 
> 
> Also, I realize the timeline is off once more. Technically Vader's fortress is not yet built. I believe it'll be a few more years in canon for him to finish building it. But I'm altering the timeline again.
> 
> Hope you like this...

The fortress, as you learned, was brand new, only recently constructed right before your arrival to this world. As such, it lacked everything you expected the home of Darth Vader to have. But then again, you weren’t all that surprised by lack of personal things. It was bare, cold, a place of steel and obsidian that made the surroundings inside dull and dark and  _ freezing _ , despite the fortress erected literally on the volcanic world of Mustafar, the fires raging down below and expelling sulfur and ash in the air. 

And as such, you were glued to the spot on the upper levels of the fortress, behind the force shield and special glass that prevented you from inhaling the dangerous vapors of the planet. You were standing on the bridge spanned between the two peaks of the fortress, staring down below at the shores between the fiery red lava. Or specifically at the  _ spot _ not far off from the structure. It was hard to miss, even hard to forget and it was  _ right in front _ of your eyes. You felt bile rising in your throat but you fought it down several times in the last hour. You thought that if you stared at it long enough that the significance of it would diminish and you’d be able to breathe. But each time you looked on, you replayed the scene of Anakin’s fall inside your head,  _ over and over again _ , and the bile would return. 

A clank off to the side startled you from your thoughts and you turned around to find the doors hissing open and Vader stepping through.

“I thought I told you to stay put,” he didn’t sound angry but there was  _ something _ that caught your attention. You supposed if he was angry he was hiding it well. You did deliberately disobey his specific instructions to stay inside the room he brought you in, claiming he needed to meditate before leaving to tend to his reasons for wanting to be here in the first place. You promised him you wouldn’t wander anywhere, but that was some hours ago and you grew tired of sitting around. You spent at least an hour or so standing on the bridge. 

You turned back to the scene outside. “It happened out there, didn’t it?” you didn’t need to ask, you already knew. You just wanted to break the tense silence.

“You shouldn’t be wandering this place by yourself,” he continued. “There are traps, along with droids—”

“So what happened to your old master?” you were still staring straight ahead. “Is he still alive?”

Ah,  _ there _ . You thought you might have noticed the glass shaking but that could have been your imagination. It seemed you hit a nerve with your question.

“As far as I know,” Vader seethed. “He won’t be for long— as soon as I find him—”

“You’ll kill him,” you finished. “So you’ve been searching for him this whole time?”

“Yes,” he paused. “Why are you—”

“And your wife,” you continued, missing how visibly Vader’s body stiffened. “She died here as well? After you choked her—”

“ _ Enough _ ,” a chilling hiss escaped Vader’s mask and then he was right next to you, trying to intimidate you with his presence.

“You don’t like talking about that,” you switched your gaze to him. “Yet you build this fortress on this planet as a  _ reminder _ ,” you quoted his earlier words. 

“You will cease talking about her,” he threatened you. 

“Hm?” you almost scoffed. “Or what? You’ll threaten to kill me  _ again _ ? Is this some sort of symbolism for people to die on this planet?”

Vader made an anguished noise. “I did not bring you here to hear you lecturing me—”

“Oh, I’m not lecturing you,” you dismissed the warning in his tone. “But since you brought me here, might as well lay all the cards out and get to the bottom of the problem.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Well,  _ you _ of course,” you fully turned around to face him. “Don’t you think you need… help?”

“ _ Help _ ?” he echoed. If you could see his face you would imagine him wearing a confused expression on his face.

You nodded. “Maybe therapy? Did you have any sort of contact with anyone post your accident, besides droids? Talk things through—”

“ _ Talk things through? _ ” he seethed. “Are you even listening to yourself?”

“You went through a big change,” you continued. “In a short amount of time, I might add. Most people won’t be able to handle the stress, let alone deal with it the way you seem to deal with it. I think it’d help if you let someone help you—”

“Is the sickness getting to your head?” he suddenly snarled. “What kind of nonsense are you spewing?”

You tried not to get worked up as you took a big breath. “I didn’t realize how serious this was.”

“What,  _ this _ ?” he gestured around. “You think I’m insane for claiming Mustafar as my home?”

“Well, at least you acknowledge it,” you almost lurched away from him when he menacingly leaned over you.

“I am  _ not _ ,” he growled. “I do not need help— this isn’t the reason why I brought you here.”

You weren’t about to give up. “You think I don’t recognize the signs? I’ve seen it plenty of times in my patients. Either you’re deluding yourself or you’re suffering from a personality disorder, or both. Why else would you insist that you’re no longer Anakin Sky—”

“ _ Quiet _ ,” his voice boomed and this time you took a step away from him. “You know  _ nothing _ .”

Your gaze skimmed over his body, finally stopping at his mask. It seemed there was no point arguing with him on this topic— at least not here. 

“Fine,” you conceded. “Does that mean you’re done with whatever you needed to get done? Because I’m itching to get the hell out of here,” you meant to take a step around him but he appeared in your view, stopping you before you moved.

“What happened on Falleen?” he suddenly asked.

You were thoroughly confused by his odd question. “What?”

“Before Xizor,” he clarified. “You went outside, didn’t you? What happened?”

You stared at him with a bewildered look on your face. “I don’t understand—”

“Your symptoms appeared  _ after _ Falleen. As far as I know you were healthy before that trip,” you scrunched your nose in disgust. He was already monitoring you at that point, weeks leading up to the trip to Falleen and then what happened in the hyperbaric chamber afterwards. 

“I don’t remember,” you were starting to get another headache. “I was walking through the forest, then I saw an animal of some sorts and then I fell—” you suddenly paused, looking down at your hand, or specifically a finger you pricked when you fell on top of the flower. You had completely forgotten about it until now. 

You looked up at Vader. “How did you know?”

His mask let out a distorted noise. “The Force showed me images. They were obscured… everything about you is.”

“That’s it?” you exclaimed. “That’s all that you saw? You dragged me here just for your Force to show you the past?” 

You seemed to aggravate him with your comment because the next moment he erupted as he started pacing in front of you. 

“I should have  _ never _ taken you with me,” he hissed. “You should not have disobeyed me— your curiosity will be your own downfall because you don’t listen. Look where it got you,” he snarled your way.

“I was told my own body was attacking itself,” you were beginning to get defensive. You hardly appreciated Vader’s tone. “I don’t see how a trip to Falleen is relevant. For all we know I could have already been sick and you just didn’t know, not until my body was overwhelmed.”

“Because of the toxin in your body,” he spat. “Whatever was injected in your body accelerated the process. We would have had more time, enough to find cure—” his vocoder made a garbled noise and you stilled, registering his words.

“So there’s nothing then?” you saw how he stiffened, how he turned away and stared out into the wilderness of red lava down below. “The Force didn’t show you the outcomes because there’s no future for me here, right?”

“There are ways we haven’t yet tried,” he started, not answering your question. “I can master the Dark Side. There are methods to cure people, even save them from dying. My master told me there is a way.”

You suddenly froze in your spot. You’ve heard this somewhere before. When you somehow connected with Anakin’s mind back on Earth. 

_ Only through me can you achieve a power greater than any Jedi. Learn to know the Dark Side of the Force and you will be able to save your wife from certain death.  _

“ _ Oh my god _ ,” you breathed, realization finally dawning on you. Everything clicked into place. The reason for Anakin’s turn. The absolute desperation to save his wife from dying in childbirth. The agony at not being able to save his own mother and the fear he was feeling at losing the only person he loved the most. The lies he was fed by the voice in those visions— presumably his own master, the Emperor. 

“I won’t let this happen again,” Vader continued as though he didn’t hear you. “I’m much stronger than before. I’m more powerful. I  _ know _ I can save you.”

You stared at his back with wide eyes. “You know you can’t stop people from dying, right?” you asked with a broken voice. “Death is a natural part of life—”

“Well it  _ shouldn’t _ be,” he spat. “Not if I can help it.”

You shuddered, cold seeping into your clothes and raising goosebumps on your skin. You stepped closer. 

“Vader,” you called out. “You’re not God. There is no being powerful enough to stop anyone from dying.”

_ Sometimes there are things no one can fix _ , a voice slithered inside your head. Padme’s.  _ You’re not all powerful, Ani.  _

“Well I am  _ now _ ,” he snarled. “I’ve become the most powerful Sith. There are no longer any Jedi that could try to stop me.”

You were shaking now as you stepped right behind him. “You don’t need to do this,” you couldn’t help the waver in your voice. “Don’t lose yourself even further in darkness. It’s not worth it.”

You were startled when he abruptly turned around. “I’m doing this for  _ you _ ,” he growled. “Don’t you see I can save you?”

“I never asked for it,” you cried out. “I don’t want to be another reason why you’re like this. I’m so sorry about your mother. I’m so sorry about your wife,” you had to fight the tremors in your body to stay where you were. But you had to press on for him to understand. “Your master  _ lied _ to you. There is no power out there that could fight the death itself.”

You thought the air would crack from the tension between you and Vader. “I won’t let you die,” he snarled again. 

“Please, don't—”

“I won’t let you be taken away from me,” he almost shouted in despair. “I can’t lose another person that matters to me.”

You stared at him with wide eyes, your breath hitching in your throat. “ _ What _ ?”

“I screwed up,” you imagined his face in anguish— you wished you could see his expression now. “You must hate me for what I’ve done, but I— I haven’t felt this way in five years. You’re the first amongst them all, even my own master, who saw me as a person. You were kind to me, even after everything I’ve done. I don’t deserve this—” his voice abruptly cut off, like a broken string. 

You weren’t expecting this conversation to take such a sudden turn and you were too shocked to say anything else.

“Which is why I can’t let you die,” he continued. “I don’t think I can take it again.”

You had to swallow a lump in your throat. “I don’t want to be probed and picked with the tools,” you raised your hand to stop him from speaking. “And I don’t want your dark magic— I’m sorry.”

“Don’t you see—”

“You have to respect my wishes,” you continued. “If I’m meant to die then so be it. But I want it on  _ my _ terms.”

Your answer had angered Vader as he balled his hands into fists. “I can force you.”

Your face fell at that. “Then I will definitely hate you for it.”

“At least you’ll be  _ alive _ ,” he snarled. 

“ _ Please _ ,” you stepped up to him, your body almost touching with his. “I don’t want to spend the rest of my days fighting with you. Don’t you think we’ve done enough of that? There’s always  _ something _ we’re arguing about. Can’t we call a truce?”

“Even if you still refuse my help?”

You nodded your head and then gave him a small smile. “If I really mean that much to you as you claim then you’ll agree.”

“That’s a dirty trick,” he spat.

“Not a trick,” you shook your head, bringing your hand up to trail your fingers along the smooth surface of his mask. “It’s negotiation— I’d rather spend the rest of my time with you than in the medical wing.”

“I can still convince you,” he insisted, his voice returning to his normal volume. You supposed it was a good sign. 

“I don’t think so,” you smiled. “I’m quite stubborn.”

“You must be forgetting who I am,” yes, you supposed Vader was easing up. He was throwing his sarcastic remarks back at you. 

“Yes, you’re worse than me,” when had he tilted his mask to now hover over you mere inches away from your face? “Can we leave now, please?” you whispered. 

Vader hesitated and you waited with stilled breath for his decision. “You know it’s only going to get worse?” he was referring to your illness. 

“I know—”

“And trips to the med bay would be necessary,” you scowled at that. 

“I know,” you sighed. “We’ll figure it out when it comes to that.”

He was still staring at you, not moving. “I won’t stop searching for answers.”

You supposed it was inevitable. You were suddenly too tired to argue. You’d been standing for hours, and the sheer strength of supporting yourself had exhausted you. So you did the only thing you could in your position— you leaned your weight against his body, pressing your cheek against the cool metal of his chest plate. 

“I know you won’t,” you whispered. “But please don’t lose yourself in this. I don’t want to lose you either,” you meant it both ways. You didn’t want him to succumb to the depths of his darkness to search for your cure. You’ve seen what it did to him both times— with his mother and his wife. It scared you to imagine that somehow you wormed yourself into his heart to become another beacon of light he was terrified to let go of. And what the consequences of it would be should he lose control. 


	35. Arrangement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a clear idea what this chapter was going to be like until I started typing it mid-way and then... well that kind of got out of hand and here we are now :o

“You should be resting.”

You looked up from your spot to see Vader entering the room.

“I  _ am _ ,” you made a notion with your hand to show that you were not exerting yourself by sitting on a couch right behind the large viewport overlooking the grand space outside the Star Destroyer. You found this to be your most favorite spot in the last few weeks ever since returning from Mustafar. Which happened to be in Vader’s own quarters— and ever since you commented that you would rather spend your time here than in your own quarters, or worse— cooped up in the medical wing with the snarky old doctor, Vader had surprisingly agreed to let you stay. 

It wasn’t like you were treading on his privacy— Vader barely stayed in this room. There was nothing in this room he could use anyways. The bed that was positioned in the center of the room was untouched, had been so ever since he took control of the  _ Devastator _ . You knew he relied only on the hyperbaric chambers and there was one positioned in the other room adjacent to the one you stayed in. And you knew, from observing him in the span of the last few weeks, that he barely even slept. When you questioned him he told you he didn’t require as much sleep and that he got his rest by meditating throughout the day. What he didn’t tell you— and he didn’t need to because you could clearly see it— was that he was in constant pain and even rest could not take the pain away. That and his  _ thoughts _ .

“I don’t consider you reading a rest,” he dryly commented and you had the urge to scoff.

“Well what else should I do?” you lowered the datapad you were holding in your hands to look at him. “You already practically forbid me from doing  _ anything _ . Next thing you’ll tell me I can’t even breathe on my own,” it was meant to be a joke— you didn’t realize what you’ve said until it was too late and by then the damage had been done. You saw him stiffen even through the layers of his suit.

“I’m sorry—”

“Have you been doing your exercises?” he interrupted your apology.

“Yes, every single day,” you sighed. “Look, I was just joking, I can breathe just fine—”

“What about the vitamins? Are you taking them as directed?”

You were starting to get annoyed and you huffed to convey your annoyance. “Vader, seriously, please stop. I can still function on my own, that one time was just a slip up—”

“The recurrence of your seizures is not what I would call a ‘slip up’,” his voice took an icy tone. “After that last one you could hardly breathe—”

“I know,” you interrupted him this time. “I  _ remember _ .”

You stared at one another, giving Vader what you hoped was a measured look for him to drop the subject. You didn’t want to talk about the progression of your illness, or how fast it seemed to be deteriorating your health. The doctor had given you months but you wondered if it was a miscalculation on his part. Just a week ago you had the scare of your life when you couldn’t breathe after waking up from another seizure. Or how long it took your body to recover this time when for the past few days all you could do was lay in bed, your limbs almost paralyzed. The doctor explained to you that your body was going after the nervous system, targeting the main muscles. There would come a time when you wouldn’t be able to breathe on your own— either that or you would die of heart failure. You didn’t want to think about it now.

You decided to change the subject. “So, I think I’ve figured out what planet that is,” you glanced behind you to look out the viewport. Vader’s room, it seemed, had the best view out of all the officers stationed aboard the Star Destroyer, not counting the main control room of the ship. The ship was stationed above the planet’s orbit for the last few days and you had taken it upon yourself to figure out the name of the planet without relying on the data from the ship’s computers. Another reason for taking the spot on the couch as one of your favorites— you liked looking out the window. 

“All it takes is pulling up the computer’s system—” Vader started and you laughed.

“Oh, what fun would it be?” you smiled. “I was doing my research,” you lifted your datapad to indicate what you were doing by what he called ‘reading’. “And I think I came to my conclusion that this must be Hoth.”

Vader, in turn, crossed his arms over his chest. “You came to this conclusion because of the climate, appearance, or the location of the planet?”

You picked up the tone of his voice and you frowned. “So… not Hoth then?”

“What would the Empire gain from the remote planet that is completely off-route towards any trade marks or Imperial outposts?” you opened your mouth to speak but Vader continued. “Not to mention lacking any valuable resources? The planet’s been in the Ice Age for decades— there is no population, only predators lurking in the snowy terrain.”

“Alright then,” it was now your turn to cross your arms over the chest as you mimicked him. “Pray and tell me then what this planet is then.”

“Ilum,” he responded.

You raised your eyebrows. “That’s it then? You won’t explain to me the reason why your ship’s been here for days nor the reason for the Empire’s interest in this planet?”

“You have your resources,” he indicated towards your datapad. “Since you’re so keen on reading.”

You huffed, your annoyance creeping back up. “There were countless planets with the same layout and climate as this one. I simply took a guess.”

“A wasted time,” he replied as he turned around, ready to head out into the main area. “There is no need for a guessing game when you have tools at your disposal ready to be utilized.”

“I can’t imagine a time when you didn’t have all this technology to help you,” you rolled your eyes and when Vader didn’t stop you swiftly followed him out. “You know my world just recently invented the Internet— prior to that people had to rely on books and maps and old phones—” you trailed off when you noticed, or rather  _ felt _ the look Vader was giving you and you had the urge to laugh again. He wouldn’t understand.

“You shouldn’t be standing,” he commented instead.

“Oh for Christ’s sake,” you went around him. “Since I’m still capable of standing and walking I might as well do it until I no longer can— and don’t tell me otherwise.  _ Please _ .” 

Vader growled but you dismissed his disapproval. “I haven’t  _ just _ been doing my research on Hoth,” you walked up towards another viewport spanned across the large room that was used as the conference space. “I’ve also been reading up on  _ other _ planets.” 

“Fascinating,” came his dry response and you whirled around to focus him with a glare.

“You know, besides being on Coruscant and Falleen, I haven’t been anywhere else,” you leaned yourself against the wall as you watched him. “But I’m sure you’ve been all over the galaxy at this point.”

“My position requires me to do so,” he replied.

“And ever since I’ve joined you on your ship, we’ve traveled to at least a dozen more planets,” you continued. 

He tilted his helmet, regarding you. “Your point?”

“My point is that I would like to  _ live _ my life,” you sighed, getting ready for an argument that was sure to come with your announcement. “And I would like to visit as many of these planets as I can before I…”

“ _ No _ ,” Vader’s voice came out as a harsh growl. 

“Do you honestly think keeping me confined in these quarters is going to keep me from dying?” you continued.

“Stop saying that,” he growled, stepping towards you. 

“We’ve already established that,” you weren’t giving up. “Nothing can do me more harm at this point. The only thing that’s wasted is  _ time _ .” 

“I don’t care—”

“Well, I  _ do _ ,” you insisted. “Haven’t you ever heard of people wishing their last wish before their deaths? Well that is  _ my _ wish.”

“ _ No _ .”

“Why  _ not _ ?” you exclaimed. You didn’t even care how petulant you sounded to your own ears.

“It’s too dangerous,” Vader’s voice boomed the closer he stepped to you. “We don’t know what can happen should you breathe in another planet’s atmosphere. The travel to and from— the physical requirements it takes on your body. You could as well excelerate your illness and we still have no cure—”

“Vader,” you stepped up to meet him, your head tilted to find his hidden gaze. “I’ve thought about it all, in the last week lying on that bed. I don’t want to die like this. And don’t say ‘I won’t’ because we both know that’s not true,” you gave him a pointed look. He had not given up on saving you ever since returning from Mustafar. Another reason for keeping close to him by staying next door to his sleeping arrangements. You weren’t sure what you were expecting from him but you didn’t wish for him to submerge himself in the Force to look for answers. 

“I can’t return to Earth— I’ve already accepted that. But what I won’t accept is limiting myself on opportunities that exist in your world. I want to see other planets. At least a few— but even that would make me happy.”

“Happy?” he echoed. 

“Happy,” you nodded your head. “And I would like for you to be there as well.”

You surprised him with that comment as you observed him. “I thought if anything you would rather avoid my company,” he stated matter-of-factly.

“What gave you that impression?” you finally broke your gaze and went around him again. “And does that mean you agree with the terms?”

“What?” he turned around as you were faced away from him. “That wasn’t—”

“To make memories,” you continued as though you were finishing out the silent thought. “That’s the only thing I can give to you. My existence will disappear from this world but at least you’ll still remember me.  _ If _ you chose to remember me. I suppose that’s your choice entirely.”

“Forgetting you is unlikely to happen,” you smiled the way he said it. Like you were the worst thing that could ever have happened to him. And perhaps you were— just in a different sense.

“I didn’t move in next door if I was avoiding your company, you know,” you turned around. 

“I have my own conditions,” he started after watching you from his spot. You nodded your head, giving him permission to continue. It was only fair that he would ask for something in return. “ _ If _ I agree to this,” he was particularly adamant about the ‘if’. “You are to follow my exact orders. Failure to do so will send you back to this ship.”

“Okay,” you weren’t going to argue with him on that one.

“You will be properly assessed by the doctor prior to any travel,” he continued. “The last thing I need is another…  _ emergency _ .” 

“Shall we document it on a paper to make it official?” you teased which resulted in Vader’s glare through the opulent lenses of his mask. “Alright,  _ fine— _ ”

“I want you to spend the night with me,” your neck almost snapped from how fast you whirled your head to stare at him. 

“ _ What _ ?”

“In my chamber,” he quickly clarified, seeing the astonished expression on your face. “Today is my monthly maintenance.”

“I don’t think I’m in any position to tend to you,” you solemnly replied. 

“That’s not why I’m asking you to stay with me,” he almost sounded… hesitant. 

“Then why?”

“Keep me company,” he stepped up to you, closing the short distance. “And to make memories, as you claim.”

“In your chamber?” you raised your brow. 

“Would you rather it be somewhere else?” you almost choked on your own saliva, your eyes widening. Did Vader insinuate something that you thought he did? Or was it all in your head?

“No— chamber is fine,” you cleared your throat.

“Good,” he nodded his head. “Then perhaps I’ll consider your request.”

“On the premises that I’ll be spending this night with you?” you were still slightly dazed. 

“You make it sound like I’m forcing you to do something that I clearly  _ can’t _ ,” he sounded exasperated even through his vocoder. “You’ve seen it with your own eyes.”

“Yes— well,” this conversation surely took a sudden turn and you had to keep your face from heating up. “I’m just… clarifying the details for this…  _ arrangement _ .” 

“Hm,” he side stepped around you, heading for the door. “I suggest you take your rest. You might need it later tonight,” he was gone before you had the chance to process his words and by then you were left speechless staring after him, your mind whirling.

Either Vader had always been such a tease and you’ve just never noticed behind all the metal armor and full-clad suit or he was dead serious and he clearly insinuated something you didn’t dare hope to get your hopes up. Because why would your heart skip a beat? 


	36. Peace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't quite know how I feel about this chapter. In all honestly I never considered going quite that route before until I started typing this and then I couldn't stop. I suppose you all be the judges of my imagination. Let me know what you all think. Enjoy ~

The night had come sooner than you expected. Yet there was still no word from Vader. You were pacing up and down the length of the room, trying to decide if you should make your way to the medical wing before him, or wait and see if he’d call for you. For a moment you thought that maybe he reconsidered his request for you to join him— after all, you weren’t sure what he was expecting from you in your position. The idea was bizarre and your stray thoughts were making you anxious until you heard a noise on the other side of the door and you hastily entered the main lounge. 

“You’re  _ here _ ?” you were expecting for him to be already in the medical wing. “I thought you’d be in the chamber by now—”

“I never specified  _ which _ chamber,” he retorted matter-of-factly and you stared at him, your mind going blank until he continued. “We’ll be staying in my quarters tonight.”

“But… your maintenance—”

“That can wait,” he gestured for you to follow him but you stayed rooted to your spot. “ _ Come _ , or have you forgotten your agreement to stay with me?”

You frowned, looking at him and then trailing your gaze behind him towards the door behind which laid his  _ other _ chamber, one you’ve never been privy of or had any desire to explore. You could have only guessed it was his  _ private _ one, one where he usually meditated and spent whatever hours he could get to rest. 

“I don’t understand,” you started, flipping your gaze back to him. “What sort of…  _ arrangement _ is this?” 

“Just for you to stay with me,” he motioned for you again. “That’s all I ask for.”

He was already unlocking the door with a set of code on the panel and the doors hissed when they slid open, offering you a brief view of what laid ahead— except it was too dark to see. Your curiosity won over your reluctance and so you followed him in, stepping inside a much smaller room, cramped with various medical equipment and pipes that you supposed acted as delivery mechanism for the rich oxygenated air Vader required to breathe. The doors shut behind you and for a moment it was pitch black to see until Vader used another panel on the wall to regulate the low lights and the start of the process to bring the room to the adequate oxygen levels for him to safely remove his mask. You paid no mind to him— because your eyes were glued to the one piece in the room which was positioned right in front of you, dominating the already cramped space, like it did not belong in here but yet still existed to taunt you. 

“You don’t use beds,” you blurted out loud, your comment blunt and to the point as you turned around to find him watching you. “What’s  _ this _ doing in here?” you pointed to the bed right next to the leather chair pushed up against it— one you supposed should have been in place of the bed. 

“For you,” he replied, stepping closer. “I had it moved in here for the night.”

You frowned. “Why?”

“Did you expect to sleep on the floor?” his comment made you pause for a moment. “I ensured your comfort beforehand.”

“Vader,” you started, trying to keep your voice neutral. “What’s the  _ real _ reason for me to be in here? You could have just as well stayed with me in the other room where there’s much more space without having to resort to these measures,” by the end of it Vader was already in front of you, crowding over your small form.

“That’s for you to decide,” he replied and your breath hitched. This couldn’t be what you thought it was, could it be?

“Is this some sort of a…  _ test _ ?” you slowly asked, your gaze on his mask. Was he trying to gauge your reaction? Or was this his way of trying to see what you’d do without having to initiate the first move? 

“If that’s what you’d like to call it,” his answer shouldn’t have surprised you but it did and you softly gasped, opening your mouth to speak only to be interrupted by a noise on the panel indicating that the oxygen levels were adequate for Vader to remove his mask. You hesitated, unsure of what to do, until Vader moved, reaching upwards with his arms to start removing his armor and you beat him to it, halting his movements with your own hands.

“Let me,” your voice was shaky and you flushed, hoping he wouldn’t notice as you started peeling off the upper layers of his suit, starting with the helmet and mask. You were glad, for once, that it was taking much longer than it would have if he only activated the mechanisms in the room to help him remove his suit, just so you could settle your thoughts and your fastly beating heart. You were avoiding his eyes when you finally removed the items, working on the collar, trying to pretend that your hands weren’t shaking. Undressing him now, without any need besides the one he had only  _ hinted _ at, was proving to be much difficult and awkward and you hoped he wouldn’t notice your nervousness as you finished with the collar. 

“Do you normally remove all of it when you’re here?” you asked when the silence had become too uncomfortable to bear.

“Might as well,” he replied with such nonchalance that you finally looked up at his face. 

“So you don’t then—”

“I don’t get the chance to enjoy much peace when I’m in here,” he continued. “Not with  _ someone _ on this ship needing  _ something _ from me,” he rolled his eyes. 

“So how’s it different tonight then?”

“I did tell the Admiral very  _ explicitly _ that if someone were to bother me they’d meet their unfortunate end by my hand,” he actually had the audacity to smirk at that and you balked. 

“Vader, you can’t just—”

“I  _ can _ ,” he pointed out. “This is  _ my _ ship, I get to have some privacy once in a while.”

“Hm,” you snorted and noticed the look he was giving you so you shook your head and continued with the task of removing his suit. “So… how long can you breathe on your own in here compared to your other chamber?”

“Long enough,” his tone made you look up at him again while you were in the process of removing the lower parts of his armor. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Leave the under layer on,” he instructed when you were about to start removing the body glove that covered his whole body from the neck down.

“Are you sure—” you stopped talking when he reached for you, his gloved fingers (he insisted on keeping his gloves on) swiping across your cheek.

“Yes,” his voice had lost its volume and you leaned forward without meaning to just to hear him, before you realized he leaned in too. 

“What are you—”

“Can I…?” he asked and you froze, looking up into his eyes to see his searching gaze behind which you saw another emotion flickering through. You didn’t dare to ask what it was he was asking about— instead you nodded your head, holding your breath when he leaned in some more, his hand sliding under your chin to lift up your head. There was slight hesitation, a second in which you were unsure of what he’d do, and then you closed your eyes and let him take control as his charred lips brushed against yours and you instantly responded, leaning in forward to seal yourself against him. The movement had taken him by surprise for the second it took you to work your lips against his, moistening the dryness and tasting a strong whiff of medicine against your tongue, before he regained his control and proceeded with answering your insistence with his own as he crushed himself against you and ravaged your mouth. It left you breathless and dazed, a spark igniting somewhere deep within you from the whirlwind of emotions running through your body, and you only pressed yourself even closer against him, your fingers digging into the leather as you let out a pitiful whine that he instantly swallowed. He let go— his breathing slightly ragged and uneven— and so was yours— and then you stared at one another, trying to catch your breaths.

“I… haven’t done that in a while,” you didn’t know why you felt the need to explain yourself but you did, biting your lip and drawing his darkened gaze back to your mouth. 

“Neither have I,” his own voice was even lower, strained and hoarse.

“Five years for you.”

“Five years,” he confirmed. 

“You are still—” you paused, trying to decide on the best words to use to describe what had just transpired. “You are good at that, you know? Kissing, I mean,” you flushed again and he actually  _ smiled _ , making you freeze not for the first time in the span of minutes. 

“I would hope so,” was his response, which made you laugh at  _ how _ he said it, like it was the most obvious thing in the world and then you instantly felt better, the tension leaving your body.

“What makes me think you were full of yourself when you were younger?” you couldn’t help but ask.

“Perhaps I was,” he sighed. “Along with  _ other _ things.”

“ _ Good _ things,” you added as you stepped away from him, making him frown.

“What are you doi—”

“Do you think you’d want to try and actually sleep?” you gestured towards the bed. 

“That’s the  _ last _ thing on my mind right now,” he responded as he stepped closer to you and once again you stepped back, trying to create at least some space between the two of you until you realized he cornered you against the wall. 

“Vader—”

“Do you have  _ any _ idea what I want to do right now?” you suppressed a shiver from the tone of his voice.

“Does it have anything to do with the fact that you’re invading my privacy?” you meant it as a joke but his face darkened and you instantly felt another tension buildup up from the mere proximity of your body to his.

“You allowed me to kiss you,” he stated and you tried to formulate a response but he continued. “Allow me to show my… gratitude for the things you’ve done for me.”

“You really don’t need to,” you started. “You’ve already expressed it enough—”

“I  _ want _ to,” he argued. 

“Vader,” you sighed. 

“You have no idea of the possibilities through the Force,” he suddenly started. “I could do so much… could show you so much,” he shook his head and then abruptly leaned forward again, pressing your body against the wall. “But I  _ can’t _ do that because of whatever kriffing entity decided that not only are you not worthy to stay in my world, you are also untouchable by the Force itself.”

“I don’t understand.”

“There are… ways to use the Force for other measures besides fighting,” your eyes widened, realizing what he was trying to say.

“Oh,” you tried looking away but you couldn’t. “I see… well then, I suppose there’s a reason for it—”

“But that doesn’t mean I still can’t give you pleasure in another form,” this time you gasped, feeling yourself flush and stutter your response.

“Please,” you tried to keep your voice even. “This isn’t about me. You really don’t need to expel your efforts on me—” your voice died when you felt Vader’s hand on your arm, trailing his fingers along the length of it to the fingertips until he continued with the motion along the side of your hip.

“Let me do this for you,” he whispered and you froze, unable to look away, unable to do anything but watch his face, his eyes, and feel his fingers on your hip through the layer of your nightgown and robe, inching closer and closer to the center of where you felt the pull, where you felt the heat spreading through your body.

“Do… what?” you whispered back. 

“This,” his fingers brushed against your inner thigh and you reacted, biting back a rather embarrassing noise as you separated your legs to give him a silent permission to continue. Even through the material of your clothes you could feel his searing touch, his fingers teasing and rubbing against the skin, so close yet so far away from his destination. You’ve never felt so desperate for someone’s touch as you did at that moment. 

“Vad—” you stopped yourself, biting your lip. “Can I call you by your other name… please?” 

“I don’t think—”

“I think,” you started, catching on to what he was about to say. “That given the...  _ circumstances _ I am allowed to call you by your given name.”

He let out what you presumed a growl of annoyance but otherwise had not said anything else. Instead, he touched you and you grabbed a hold of his arm to still his movements, earning a curious look from his eyes.

“Step back,” you ordered and before he mistook it for rejection you continued. “Let me help you with the offending item,” you saw the plain confusion on his face and almost laughed. He could be so intimidating yet so clueless at times. Or perhaps he had just forgotten what it was like to be with a woman. He complied and you wasted no time getting rid of the robe covering your nightgown, nor the nightgown itself, slipping it off your body and dropping it by your feet. You heard his sharp intake of breath and you kept your gaze on his face as his eyes raked over your exposed body. 

“I thought it was only fair for you to see me like this,” he was still not talking, even after some minutes passed of him just taking you in with his gaze. “When I’ve already seen your body countless times before.”

“Yours does not compare to mine,” he finally responded, stepping closer to you.

“I beg to differ,” you lifted your chin, pressing your head against the wall as you watched him advance onto you. “I think we’re rather alike. We are both imperfect. I’m  _ defected _ and you’re… you’re  _ you _ .”

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

“It doesn’t have to—” he touched you again, this time more firm and without a teasing touch, his gloved finger grazing against the spot between your legs that made you arch your back and muffle a moan. 

“ _ No _ ,” he growled. “I want to hear you.”

“I can be… rather loud,” you gasped, grabbing a hold of his waist to stabilize yourself. 

“Good,” he increased the pressure and you felt like someone ignited you with a torch. “I’m rather hard of hearing,” he was referring to his hearing loss after the accident but it still made you catch your breath when you tried to laugh at his rather bad joke, only to let out a moan when he slid his finger past your folds. 

“Anakin—” you gasped, your lower body spasming under his expert ministrations. Who would have thought his stiff fingers could be used in such a way to give you pleasure, especially considering their size. He had large hands and with the gloves the mere presence of three of his fingers were giving you the sensation that you were overly full, your body unused to such a deed after your abstinence from such physical pleasures in a while. 

“Do you like it?” you almost cried from how unsure he sounded. It seemed ever since his ability as a man was stripped away in the fires of Mustafar, he was doubting himself with you even through your pleasured cries filling up the room. 

“God—  _ yes _ ,” you breathed, working your hips in tandem to his thrusts. “Faster— please,” you breathed.

“As you wish.”

You could feel his gaze as you writhed under him, your own eyes closed as you enjoyed the feel of his fingers inside of you, his movements increased and precise as he continued hitting that spot deep within you, his fingers curling and making you see the stars. You lost track of time, the only cognizant part of you focused on his hand between your legs, his other working circles around your breasts and squeezing. You must have screamed and moaned repeatedly for your voice to go hoarse, but he was relentless, riding you through several orgasms until you were spent and tired and  _ soaked _ . You had buried your face in his neck, his warm breath ruffling your stray hairs as he coaxed your final release out of you, now lazily trailing his hand playing with your breast down your back. 

“I’m sorry about your glove,” you spoke after a while, after you were sure you could stand on your own when you didn’t feel like your legs would give out under you.

“Do not concern yourself about that,” was his response. 

“Still,” you murmured. “It’s now useless.”

“It’s only  _ wet _ ,” you flushed, feeling silly for being so embarrassed about the fact that you ruined his glove with your fluids. “I will still use it.”

You shifted in his hold, lifting your head to find his gaze. “I wish I could do something in return—”

“You’ve done enough,” he interrupted you. “You took care of me both on Earth and here. I couldn’t ask for anything else besides the obvious,” you knew exactly what he was referring to. For you to live and stay with him. 

“Then lay with me,” you gestured towards the bed. “If I can’t do anything else, then I’d like to at least offer you some comfort.”

He hesitated as you watched him come up with his decision. “I will require a mask soon,” you nodded your head, understanding that soon he won’t be able to breathe on his own. 

“I can see a nasal cannula from here,” you looked back at him. “Would that be enough for you not to be in your suit?” 

“Yes,” you smiled at that, gesturing for him to follow. You didn’t bother putting on your clothes, the body heat emitting from the inner layer of his suit was enough to keep you warm, and you’d soon be under the covers he prepared for you before he had any knowledge he’d be spending the rest of the night with you in one bed. 

You ensured his comfort as you helped him attach the oxygen cannula over his nose, allowing him to take up as much space as he needed in the bed before you climbed in and pressed yourself against him, wishing you could feel his body directly against your own skin. You knew he was sacrificing his ability to spend however much time he needed healing his body in the bacta tank with you but a part of you did not care. You were content with being with him, with wrapping your arms around him as you carefully pressed your head against his shoulder, entangling your legs with his own, listening to his breaths and making sure he was alright before you both fell asleep. 

“Anakin,” you softly spoke in the darkness when he turned off the lights with a flick of his wrist.

“Yes?”

“If I were to ask for you to take me to  _ any _ planet, would you do it?” you held your breath, waiting for his response. 

“What planet are you thinking of?” he carefully started after a moment of silence, perhaps sensing that he won’t like whatever it was you came up with. 

“Well— a few,” you started. “But I was thinking of visiting your wife’s planet first.”

You felt him tense beside you. “Why?”

You weren’t so sure yourself except that it seemed like it was him who needed to visit that planet more than you.

“I think it’s only fair after you dragged me to Mustafar,” you shifted in his arms, lifting your head to try and find his gaze in the darkness only to see pitch black. “Unless that planet is another volcano place.”

“No,” you almost frowned, thinking he was rejecting your request until he continued. “It’s one of the most beautiful planets I’ve ever laid my eyes on,” you could hear the fondness in his voice and you smiled. “I think you’d like it.”

“So… does that mean it’s a ‘yes’?”

“You remember my conditions,” he reminded you of your conversation a few hours prior. 

“Yes,” you rolled your eyes. “How could I forget? I’m sure you’ll remind me every chance you’ll get.”

“Hm,” he wasn’t as amused by your response. “You could have asked for a much worse planet than Naboo,” you figured it was the name of the planet where you’ll be going next. “So I won’t reject your request.”

You wondered what he meant by the ‘worse’ planet. Even though you had a suspicion you knew  _ exactly _ which planet he was referring to. You wouldn’t press for it now anyways— one planet at a time was enough to get you through. Arguing could come later, for right now you just wanted to sleep.

“Thank you,” you quietly whispered. He didn’t question you on what you were thanking him for. It could as well be for everything he’d done for you today. Instead he leaned forward, capturing your lips in a soft kiss as his way of expressing his own gratitude. 

You stayed up long enough to hear the change in his breathing, tell when he finally succumbed to his much needed sleep before you allowed yourself that luxury. You imagined this must have been the first time he’d fallen asleep on the bed in the company of another human being since his accident, and for once that thought did not make you sad. If anything, it only made you smile as you buried your face in his chest. Because if anything, you knew that Anakin was finally allowed his much needed peace. 


	37. Festival.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out to you guys ;_;  
> If you're still here, thank you for patiently waiting for me. For some reason this particular chapter gave me a major writer's block. But I managed to finish it (thanks to the snow day today that let me go off work early :)) I hope whoever is still waiting on this that you would enjoy it. I promise I'll try to finish this soon!

“...So, the Festival of Light is still celebrated even after the fall of the Galactic Republic?” you were reading up on the culture of Naboo, scrolling through the datapad as Vader was readying the ship for take-off. 

“The tradition maintained,” was his reply, his focus shifted between your questions and the controls before him. “Naboo is also the Emperor’s homeworld. He allowed the people to keep their holiday in exchange that they would celebrate it for the creation of the Empire. The principle behind it changed… but the festivities associated with the holiday stayed the same.”

You glanced at him. “You’ve attended the festival before then?”

“Not recently,” you inclined your head, waiting for him to elaborate. “It’s been many years…” you noticed the way he was reluctant to speak of it, or any topic associated with Naboo altogether, He could tell you the principles and the traditions if you asked, but anything that was borderlining into personal territory he tried to avoid. As though he was trying to block it from his memory. 

“Ah,” you nodded your head. “Were you with Pad—”

“ _ Yes _ ,” his reply came much quicker and much colder this time around. “I would rather not speak of it.”

“Why not?” you earned a glare from him that you could feel even through the lenses of his mask. “You did agree to take me there and you knew I’d have questions—”

“And I’m starting to regret it already,” you could feel his irritation even without hearing his natural voice. 

You frowned and quickly looked away. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea in the first place. “If you’re having second thoughts then maybe it’d be best to—”

“ _ No _ ,” you were startled from the abruptness in his voice. “I agreed to take you there and I will keep to my word,” you felt the vibrations under your seat as the ship lifted up from the ground and Vader was easily guiding it out from the exit of the hangar. 

You remained silent, words eluding you for a moment as once again the stars and the bleak vacuum of space captivated you as you watched everything turn into white and blue streaks of lights as Vader lurched the ship into hyperspace. You resumed your reading shortly after, deciding that Vader was in no mood for small talks. For the past few weeks leading up to your departure he had been more curt with his responses to you on any matters regarding this trip. You knew he wasn’t exaggerating when he told you he was regretting this decision. You tried to remain optimistic and hopeful his mood would improve, but it seemed like the air was turning much colder and thicker with each passing moment the closer you reached your destination. It was almost suffocating. You audibly sighed, unaware that you did so, drawing his attention to you. 

“Are you alright?”

“ _ Fine _ ,” you didn’t mean to sound so curt yourself, but you couldn’t help but feel frustrated. You dropped the datapad on your lap and sighed again. Vader was surprisingly quiet, as though he knew you had more to say. And you certainly did. “I just… this is the first time in a while since I’ve been to another planet since Falleen. And I should be more excited but…” you trailed off, shaking your head. “Never mind.”

“There is something bothering you,” he voiced and you hid your expression as you turned your head the other way away from Vader. 

“Yes,” your fingers were playing with the hem of your jacket. “ _ You _ ,” you waited for him to say something but he stubbornly remained silent. You were starting to grow agitated with the whole thing. 

“You don’t want to go to Naboo,” you stated as you turned your gaze back to him to find him already watching you. “And there’s a reason why. And something is telling me it has nothing to do with your memories of that place.”

“Perceptive,” he replied. “I admit I have been less than… amiable with you in the last few weeks,” you almost made a comment stating he was right about that but he continued. “But this has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me.”

“Classic,” you rolled your eyes. 

“What is?” he was confused. 

“It’s not you but me sort of thing,” you almost laughed at how absurd it sounded. But at least it cleared up some tension between the two of you. 

“It’s… complicated,” he finally stated and you raised your brow at that but refused to comment. If he was reluctant to even tell you of his reasons for not wanting to be anywhere near Naboo, you knew you wouldn’t be able to extract any other information from him when he was in one of his infamous moods. You decided to drop it for now, at least until you were done with your visit to the planet.

“We’ll be arriving just in time for the festival,” he announced after a while, when you thought you had dozed off only to be woken up by the sound coming off from the console that the ship was about to exit the hyperspace. You straightened out in the chair, your excitement washing away your earlier annoyance with Vader and soon your vision was greeted by a planet basking in many blues and greens. You watched with the renewed anticipation as Vader slowly lowered the ship in the planet’s atmosphere, the early hours of sunset painting the sky in many hues of purples and pinks, until you cleared out from the upper levels of the atmosphere through the clouds and then you gasped, your breath catching in your throat at the display presented before you.

You were flying over the vast greenery fields, some of which were utilized for agriculture but the rest were left untouched— many native flowers covering the grasslands, surrounded by slopes and mountains with waterfalls and rivers. You passed a particularly lavish spot that looked untouched, noticing something moving down below until you realized it was some sort of animal. When you looked closer you could spot several of them moving about and grazing on the grassland.

“What are those?”

“Shaaks,” Vader responded, gliding the ship closer and closer to the capital of Naboo. 

“How peculiar,” you smiled. “We have nothing like that sort back on Earth.”

“I won’t be able to get us much closer to the city until nightfall,” Vader continued and you glanced up to see what looked like domes glistening in the sunset rays at a distance. You understood the necessity for Vader to cloak both yours and his presence when coming to this planet. Even though Naboo lacked any sort of Imperial presence on the planet, Vader’s all too-easily recognizable look would draw plenty of attention if he was to walk around in the broad daylight. You also had suspicion that he did not inform anyone on his Star Destroyer of where he was going. 

Vader had offered the Imperial codes to the Theed Hangar, guarded by the Royal Guards without giving out his own identification before approaching the capital, ensuring that you both would be left alone without rousing any suspicions. You understood his reasons for wanting to take as many precautions as you could and wait until the sun set completely but it didn’t stop him from gliding the ship up and above the Royal Palace of Naboo, which was situated on a tremendous cliff in the city’s central district, offering panoramic views of the sweeping countryside below and beautiful waterfalls, accentuated by the mountainous view off to the distance. It was here where the Festival of Light would take place and you had the perfect view from up above to witness it. 

You were too caught up in the beauty of Naboo to notice that Vader was watching you. The city almost looked like it jumped out of the picture that was painted by one of the Renaissance artists back on your home world— the surrounding structures all had their elegance to them and created a harmonious style with the nearby nature of the planet. The many domed buildings maintained a handcrafted aesthetic, mixed with the sleek and mechanical parts of the city. You’ve never been to Rome but you pictured it to be about the same style as Naboo. You could at least proudly say that you’ve been somewhere where no other human from Earth had ever been to. 

The Festival of Light started soon after. It was nothing of what you imagined it to be but everything that you thought it would be, considering this to be an alien world. It was over too soon and by then the whole city was basked in darkness as the sun finally set, only for the buildings to be lighted with multiple lights, twinkling like white stars against the black sky. There would be more small celebrations happening all across the town, with many Nubians drinking and celebrating on the streets. 

Vader finally elected to land in the most inconspicuous part of the city, away from prying eyes. You almost laughed when you noticed him draping himself with another cloak on top of the one he had wrapped around his neck guard, hiding his mask and his chest box under the black robe. He blended too much with the darkness but it was a necessary precaution to avoid being seen. You opted to walk around without concealing your features, the night air feeling cool against your skin. There was something sweet in the air— some sort of natural perfume wafting through the air, probably coming from all the flowers planted on the sidewalks of the city. You enjoyed the quietness, occasionally passing some bypassers who were ignorant of the tall figure walking beside you. Vader, for once, was in no hurry, matching your strides with his own. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” you finally asked after a while, glancing up at Vader.

“What?” you seemed to startle him from his deep thoughts. 

“Are you still in a bad mood?” 

“I wasn’t in a bad mood.”

“ _ Really _ ?” you quirked your eyebrow at him. “It seemed to me that way.”

He was silent— beside the usual sound of his respirator. You frowned, pausing your steps. Vader walked ahead but then stopped, realizing you were no longer walking beside him. 

“Is there something the matter?” he asked, turning around. 

“You tell me,” you stared at him. “And don’t act like there’s nothing wrong.”

“I told you,” his voice took an edge. “It’s complicated.” 

“Yes, well, everything that has to do with you is  _ complicated _ ,” you almost rolled your eyes. 

“You wouldn't understand,” he sounded dejected, which caused you to frown even more. 

“Vader—” you stepped up to him, feeling his wary gaze on you even through the mask. “Tell me what’s wrong. It’s not healthy to keep your feelings bottled up like that. And I know there’s  _ something _ there.”

You were staring at one another through the dark, the night preventing you from clearly making out the glint of his mask behind the hood of his robe. Finally, Vader shifted and turned, walking away from you. You were about to call out after him, too stunned to become angry, but he motioned for you to follow him.

“Come.”

You did so without questioning, confusion washing over you as Vader took deliberate turns through the quiet streets of Theed, until after what seemed like an hour, he stopped at the outskirts of the city— a quiet and serene place compared to the rest of the city. You looked on with confusion, trying to figure out where you were. You looked up at Vader to see him staring straight ahead at the nearby structure, which was hidden in the shadows. 

“It’s a tradition to cremate the bodies of Naboo’s Monarchs within two days of their death,” Vader started and you listened— it seemed important that you listened to this. Something about this place seemed important. “The belief is that it returns the life force of the dead to the planet. The ashes would then be thrown from the bridge into the Solleu River before it plunges over the cliff. Then there’s nothing left— only the thought of the dead as they’re mourned at the Temple.”

You stepped closer to Vader. He continued, as though lost in his own thoughts, barely noticing your presence. 

“The rules were broken five years ago. Instead of cremating her, they placed  _ her _ body in a mausoleum and erected a statue for her,” you looked up at Vader in alarm. “The people of Naboo loved her that much to let her go. And now it’s a constant reminder of what was lost— what should have been.”

It finally dawned on you where you were as soon as the clouds cleared overhead and the moon’s light shone on the single structure up ahead— a final resting place and a burial site of none other than Padme Amidala, former Queen and then Senator of Naboo. You could make out the words atop the vault, the inside of it open and beckoning for anyone to enter. A stone statue was placed beside the mausoleum, overlooking her resting place. You took in her features, comparing them to the visions in your dreams. She looked beautiful— peaceful like that, her memory forever etched into the stone. 

“Do you know that I missed her funeral?” Vader spoke beside you and you turned, startled by his admission. “I had just awakened from my surgery— I could barely even stand let alone walk. But I could have made it. I decided not to. I watched her funeral from the HoloNews.” 

“Vader…” you didn’t know what to say to that. What could you possibly say to make it any better?

“I’ve never gone to visit her.”

You whirled around. “ _ What _ ? Are you saying— wait—  _ never _ ? Is this the first time since…?”

“I’m a coward,” something unintelligible came out of Vader’s vocoder— you almost imagined it being a dry laugh. “Even now I can’t bring myself to face her.”

You turned fully around, placing yourself before Vader to try and catch his attention. He snapped his head down to watch you just as you placed your hand atop of his arm. 

“You’re not a coward,” you softly spoke, your words almost drowned in the soft wind. 

“If I’m not a coward then what am I?” he spat. “What do you call someone who deliberately refuses to pay their respects to the person that used to mean a world to them?”

“It’s your guilt preventing you from doing something you should have done a long time ago,” you squeezed his arm. “But it shouldn’t hold you in place forever. At some point you should make an effort to overcome that guilt.”

“I  _ killed _ her,” he pointed out. 

“Yes— and you should probably go and apologize to her,” this was merely a suggestion, your voice was still quiet. You didn’t want to push him too far. 

He remained standing, almost blending in with the night; his rigid body could easily be mistaken for a statue. You sighed, almost giving up on the effort to make Vader see the reason. You finally understood his reluctance to come to this planet in the first place. It was almost comical in a sense to think that he was terrified of the one thing that he claimed he loved. It was sad too— sad to think that he never said his goodbyes and properly grieved the loss of his wife. 

“Won’t you come with me?” his voice pulled you back.

You shook your head. “I think you should do this alone. I’ll be right here— waiting,” you gave him a small smile, squeezing his arm once more before pulling away. You stepped aside, giving him room to move ahead. He hesitated, his movements indecisive. He briefly glanced your way and then back towards the mausoleum, then nodded his head as though making up his mind, before proceeding to the entrance of the vault. You watched his back until he disappeared inside and then you waited. 

You didn’t know how much time passed, only that the lights in some buildings soon diminished and then went out completely— the festival coming to an end and people returning back to their homes. You didn’t mind this at all— at some point you made your way to the bridge not far off from the mausoleum, which crossed the river to the other side of the city. You wondered if this was the bridge Vader spoke of when telling you of the Nubian’s tradition of their dead. You stood there for a while, breathing in the night’s air. And soon Vader joined you as well, coming up beside you without saying a word. You glanced up at him, watching from the side to see if anything had changed. Because there was certainly a lighter air around him— sad and melancholic, but lighter. 

“Thank you.”

You were surprised at the sound of his voice breaking the comfortable silence and the actual meaning of his words. 

“How… are you?” you asked.

“Better,” he admitted. “They’ve done a remarkable job with her grave site. You should see the stained glass window with her image,” you smiled at that. 

“I’m sure it’s beautiful,” you inclined your head. “I’m glad you did this.”

He turned his head your way. “I’m not so sure I feel the same way.”

“But it feels better?” you reminded him. “It won’t ever be the same… but at least it’ll get easier. Now you can visit her any time you want.” 

He hesitated again, something in his body language causing you to suspect there was something more Vader wanted to talk about but not finding the courage to ask. You found this side of him… perturbing. 

“What is it?” you asked. 

“Where—” he trailed off, then tried again. “How would you feel about this being  _ your _ resting place?” 

The question caught you off guard. You never thought about the  _ after— _ you were always stuck up on what was before, how much time you had left to do what you wished to get done. But it never occurred to you how Vader perceived this in his own mind, what his thought process was once you were gone from this world. 

You looked away from him into the distance, down into the darkness with the water rolling past the edge of the cliff. 

“I don’t think I’d want to be buried,” you finally spoke after you had the chance to think about it. “I think I’d want to be cremated instead,” you looked up to see him watching you. “But if you wish— I don’t mind you sending my ashes over the bridge.”

“Then I won’t have anything to remember you by,” he spoke.

“You’ll have this memory,” you smiled. “And your wife— Padme, always waiting for you,” you broke away from the railing, suddenly feeling the need to walk. “Do you want to head out back to the ship?” you asked him. 

“Yes,” it seemed Vader felt the same way. There was only enough sadness you both could take in one day. He started walking and you resumed your place by his side, slowly making your way back to the ship. The town was fast asleep by then but the stillness was soothing. You hardly even noticed where you were until you reached the small landing platform with Vader’s ship. You wordlessly climbed inside the cockpit, waiting for Vader to engage the controls and lift the ship into the atmosphere.

“Is this what you had in mind when you asked me to bring you here?” Vader suddenly asked.

“It’s everything I hoped for and more,” you responded. “What about you?”

“I wasn’t planning on visiting Padme,” he admitted. “That was why—”

“You were reluctant to come here,” you beat him to it. “I know. I understand.”

“I hope I didn’t spoil your time here with my—”

“You  _ didn’t _ ,” you didn’t let him finish that thought. “Thank you for allowing me to come with you in the first place.”

“No— thank  _ you _ .”

You weren’t going to argue. Nor correct him on his misplaced gratitude for a chance for him to come to Theed in the first place. It was bound to happen sooner or later. You were only happy that it happened now, while you were by his side. 


	38. Eyes.

You knew convincing Vader to take you to the next location would be difficult. But you never imagined it to be almost impossible. He was adamant he would  _ never _ step a foot on that forsaken planet ever again. 

_ But I want to see where you were born _ , you argued with him. 

_ It’s nothing but a desert planet _ , would be his only response before he would either leave the room or swiftly change the subject. 

It took weeks arguing and you trying to persuade Vader to take you to Tatooine before he finally changed his mind. Or rather a rapid decline of your health that forced him to reconsider your request. 

_ You’ve been to Earth before _ , you’ve told him.  _ Even if it was fleeting. You were still there. Now I want to visit your homeworld. _

When you recalled that conversation you didn’t finish that particular sentence. You didn’t tell him that you thought Tatooine would be the last planet you’d visit before your death. Because the time was ticking and you were getting worse. You tried to hide it, tried to pretend that everything was alright, if not for your sake then for Vader’s. But you couldn’t hide it forever. 

The night before your departure Vader was called off to Coruscant, unexpectedly. You remembered how angry he was, how desperate he was to delay his departure until the following day. It seemed the Emperor had other plans. He came to you that night and demanded for you to wait until his return. You swiftly declined— you didn’t think you had that much time left. Vader had given you his ultimatums as his conditions and you had nothing else to do but agree if only to make that trip. 

You asked him to stay with you that night. And you asked about his mother for the first time. And as always, he was still reluctant to speak of anything that involved his old life. You coaxed it out of him regardless— slowly and painlessly as he opened up to you. You liked hearing him talk of her— his voice would change even through the modulator. He’d only ever told you good things about her, never the bad. He’d talk about his time as a child and her ever solid presence by his side. You remembered the rest from the vision you shared with him— about his life as a slave and his mother’s death at the hands of Tusken Raiders. But you didn’t need for him to relive those memories again. So you only listened and let him tell you what he could. By the time you woke up the next morning, he was already gone. And you were greeted by the troopers Vader assigned to you as your entourage to take you to Tatooine. 

_ Only an hour _ , you recalled Vader telling you of his conditions while you were transported on a small shuttle.  _ That’s all you get. You’ll have the troopers loyal to me take you to Mos Espa spaceport. You’ll have a tracker on you the whole time. If you feel any danger you signal for help and you’ll be immediately extracted.  _

You questioned Vader’s odd paranoia even for a man who was always paranoid about something. He’d told you Tatooine wasn’t a place for a woman like you. You couldn’t even get offended by his blant reply— you’ve done plenty of research on the planet before making your request. You read about the hardships of people living on Tatooine and their harsh ways of life. Still, you agreed to his demands. Vader was sacrificing a lot for that one hour to cave to your request. 

“Stay close to us,” one of the troopers told you when you finally landed outside Mos Espa. You were in the most inconspicuous vessel Vader could possibly pick out but you understood the need for that, as well as yours and the troopers’ outfits. Tatooine was in the Outer Rim territories, controlled by the Hutt Space. The Hutts had a shaky relationship with the Empire and even the threat of Darth Vader was not enough to scare them. Bringing the Imperial presence on this planet was foolish if one did not have a good enough reason for doing so. Another reason as to why Vader was so against coming here in the first place. He couldn’t walk around unnoticed like he did on Naboo. His presence here would be far too recognizable and it would be dangerous to travel here at night time. So you had to do what you could to hide your appearance as you wrapped yourself in a covering to protect yourself from the twin suns’ heat. 

It was just as Vader described it when you finally made it to the entrance of the city. Mos Espa was one of the few port cities of Tatooine and as such, the city was filled with dwellings, workplaces, and commercial operations of many kinds, along with entertainment venues. It lacked the color— everything here was in color of sand, to the point of almost blinding you as you stared at the buildings blending in with the sun. It was mid-afternoon, past the highest peak of the suns, but the heat was still unbearable and your clothes only proved to be a hindrance to your breathing. You pocketed the device in your clothes that was meant to administer some relief that Doctor Syko had given you before your departure. You were saving it for extreme measures, so instead you proceeded inside the heart of the city with several stormtroopers dressed in garments that made them look like simple workers/smugglers trailing behind you, keeping their respective distance from you. 

Halfway through your hour the heat had become intolerable and you stepped off to the side, hiding behind the building’s shape as you leaned against the wall, looking over at the people passing you by. There were many creatures here that you’d never seen before and you tried your best not to ogle them. A commotion up ahead caught your eye. It was a young man, arguing with what appeared to be a store owner about some sort of part for a vaporator. You tuned them out, staring up at the sky as you finally unwrapped the head covering from your face, breathing a sigh of relief. 

“You’re not from here, are you?” a small voice caught you by surprise and when you glanced down you realized you were no longer alone. A child was standing next to you in the same shade, looking up at you as he studied you. You didn’t realize you were doing the same, staring at the child’s face in wonder, almost like you were transported back to that vision so many months ago, looking through Padme’s eyes at the young face of Anakin. 

“I’m sorry?” you finally asked when the child seemed to ask you a question, which you completely missed.

“You’re really pretty,” the child— a boy— stated, with a slight blush coloring his cheeks. “I’ve never seen anyone like that around here.”

“Why— well— thank you,” you smiled at him, inclining your head to the side as you watched the boy. “Are you here by yourself? Where are your parents?”

“My parents are dead,” the boy replied with such determination that it caught you off guard. He seemed much older than he looked. “I’m here with my uncle,” he pointed straight ahead to the same young man you noticed earlier, now this time arguing even louder than before. 

“Oh,” you didn’t know what to say to that. “Do you live around here?”

“We live on the farm,” the boy scrunched his nose as though he disliked the thought of admitting this to anyone. 

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” you lowered down to the ground, now on the same eye level with the boy. 

“Yeah— well— I don’t want to spend the rest of my life here,” he shrugged his shoulders and looked away, as though ashamed of admitting this to a stranger. 

“Yeah?” you were intrigued. “Then what do you want to do?”

“I want to travel to every single planet in the galaxy,” the boy turned back to you and grinned. “I want to visit them all,” that drew a smile to your own face. 

“If you want to do that then you must first learn how to fly,” you joked with him.

“Oh— I know  _ how _ ,” he answered with such arrogance that you almost laughed out loud. “In a few years I can even enter the podrace, but my uncle does not want me to.”

You’ve heard of podracing from Vader— he once mentioned it as the most common sport here on Tatooine. Common, but very dangerous. 

“Your uncle is right,” you pointed out. “It’s dangerous for someone your age.”

“I’m almost  _ six _ ,” the boy countered. “I’m a big boy now.”

“I’m sure you are,” you hid your smile but the boy still looked at you with suspicion in his eyes, not believing your ruse. 

“You don’t believe me,” he accused you. “Then you must know I’ll be the best pilot the galaxy has ever known, just like my father was.”

“I know someone who claims  _ he’s _ the best pilot in the galaxy,” you recalled Vader’s words the first time he taught you how to fly. 

“Oh yeah?” the boy perked up. “Then who is it?”

“I’m sure if you ever get the chance, you’ll meet him,” you smiled at him, seeing as he pouted. “Don’t worry, he’s hard to miss.”

“Luke,” his uncle’s voice finally reached you and you looked up to see him waving at the boy. “Come here boy. We’re leaving.”

The boy— Luke— sighed and rolled his eyes. “I better go before Uncle Owen gets mad at me.”

“Yes, you probably should,” your own time was up as well. You had to head back to the ship. “It was nice meeting you, Luke,” you nodded at him before he had the chance to run off to his uncle. 

“Yeah,” he nodded back, and turned to leave but halfway through he stopped and turned around. “You just watch me,” he called after you. “I’ll be the most famous person in the entire galaxy.”

You didn’t reply. You watched as Luke disappeared with his uncle in the speeder, before heading back to your own ship. 

It was only after you boarded and headed back out to Vader’s Star Destroyer that it dawned on the reason why Luke reminded you so much of Anakin. It was the eyes— the resemblance was so uncanny. You didn’t think you’d ever seen a being with such a pretty color of blue, not until you met Anakin. 

And now Luke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got to me the most... and tbh that's not how I envisioned for it to end. In my original draft Luke would tell the reader his full name... but I changed it. I think I like this version better. It hurts to know how close the truth was to the surface... but I love hurting you all so that's nothing new lol. Hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
